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- According to a new report, the first person to become sick with coronavirus was a vendor in a large Wuhan animal market.
- At least the sex parties in NYC are apparently better than ever.
- Sen. John Kennedy insulted Dr. Saule Omarova, the Biden administration's nominee to be comptroller of the currency, using Red Scare-era tactics to try to imply she is a communist.
- Like a college student who just realized he isn't close to finishing his thesis, Mayor Bill de Blasio is frantically trying to fulfill his promise to ban horse carriages before the end of his term.
- What's wrong with this picture: A 20-year-old man pleaded guilty "to rape, attempted sexual abuse and two misdemeanors in attacks on four girls." He faced eight years in prison, but instead was given eight years’ probation.
- If you come across a stream that smells like beer, that's probably because it is filled with alcohol.
- Here's an adorable excerpt from Mel Brooks' forthcoming memoir about his adorable romance with Anne Bancroft.
- Look, no one is denying that Mike messed up bad, but the person who wanted revenge on Mike and decided to spray paint his car only to spray paint someone else's car messed up as well.
- Emmanuel Olunkwa, the new editor of the architecture magazine PIN-UP, has some thoughts on what object in NYC should be redesigned: "New York City windows, because you can’t clean them, whereas in Europe you can completely open them from the side."
- Jonah Hill will play Jerry Garcia (!) in a Grateful Dead biopic (!!) directed by Martin Scorsese (!!!).
- And finally, here's the cutest subway rider we've seen in awhile:
Extra Extra: It's The End Of NYC As We Know It But The Sex Party Scene Is Fine
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