Someone has been hanging up these signs around New York City (this one was spotted in LIC) which signal the hatching of some downright evil plans. The poster is looking to form a team of minions for some unspecified dastardly deed. The sign announces:
"Evil genius seeks minions to sacrifice their lives in world domination attempt. Must be prepared to work 24-7 for fascist psychopath for close to no pay. Messy death inevitable but costumes and laser death rays provided. NO Weirdos."
There's a phone number included (1-800-MWA-HAHA) which we just called, and it goes to Cap Rock Telephone Cooperative, where a nice woman who answered asked if we were calling because of the "Mwahaha sign." Shamed, we hung our head and apologized, as we inquired how many others had called her today—she told us she's heard from over 500 hopeful minions in the past few hours (likely because the sign also got posted on Reddit).
Keep your heads up, prospective minions, there's bound to be another job that comes along... but please stop calling that number.