2005_02_artsvdaydog.jpgWe planned on giving you a whole list of things to do on this rainy, cold Monday (aka: Valentine's Day) but let's face it, your destiny is sealed. Either you're "coupled" and you're going to spend the night in a dimly lit Italian restaurant. Or you're going to sit home alone on the couch with a dozen mini cupcakes from Sugar Sweet Sunshine watching Bridget Jones' Diary. Okay, maybe we have a few suggestions up our sleeve...

Ultra-hyped Brits the Kaiser Chiefs are at Mercury Lounge tonight, but it's sold out. So...now you're single and missing a really hyped up show. But have no fear, the folks at UCB Theater have a full night of heart-wrenching entertainment for you. First up is Love Rules! at 8pm followed by Love Sucks! at 9:30. Something for everyone! Aziz Ansari tells us that he'll be declaring his love for M.I.A. during the Love Rules! portion, and apparently there's something about Interpol too. Aziz is such the hipsters comedian.

After the show: drink. Nothing is better for curing the Valentines Day blues then doing shots with strangers at a bar. Enter Valentines Singles Night at 12" Bar [179 Essex St] which involves an intimate space, one small bathroom and free shots. It's like a recipe for love! Or lust, whatever.

So, put down the cupcake and get out there. And just think, you don't have to deal with those gross orange whipped filled chocolates. You know, the one's you bite into by accident because there's no way of telling what's inside! Who needs that kind of surprise? Not us.

Update, V-Day links: Seattlest has some ideas that can translate to our city as well, especially since we're pretty sure there's a Toys in Babeland on Rivington Street. Not that we've ever gone in. And Ben Brown turns you on, to internet dating that is.

[img via Fred Flare]