Spring weather arrived suddenly this week, giving you plenty of excuses to roll around in the grass outside. But in case you need one more, look no further than the dream job offered by this Craigslist ad—do you have what it takes to push Henry the tortoise around in his stroller in Central Park?

Henry's owner Amanda, who lives in the Harlem/Morningside Heights area just above the park, told us she has had Henry (who you can follow on Instagram) for two years: "Before me, Henry had never been to the park and got all of his exercise walking around the apartment. I take Henry to Central Park every weekend in the summer, but weekdays are harder" because of work, she explained. "I'm hiring a tortoise walker, because I want Henry to enjoy more park days when it's 70+ out and when I'm on vacation. Tortoises like him need exercise, and I feel bad that he doesn't have a backyard."

The ad reads:

I'm in search of a responsible animal lover to take Henry, my 16-year-old African tortoise, to Central Park on warm weekdays. I live a few short blocks from Central Park and have a pet stroller to get him to and from. Once he's there, Henry can roam freely under your watchful eye. No tortoise experience necessary, but you must be an animal person and also good with people. (Trust me -- they'll want to talk to you!) If you're sociable and like to hang out in Central Park anyway, this is an easy gig.

You probably want to know more about Henry: does he wear a leash? Is he surprisingly quick on his feet? What's his favorite color? Do tortoises go to the bathroom? What's his least favorite meme? Do tortoises eat children? Do children eat tortoises? Some of the questions were answered in the listing:

A little more info about Henry:

-He doesn't wear a leash and is surprisingly quick, so you'll need to keep an eye on him.
-He weighs about 16 pounds, so you'll need to be able to lift him in and out of the stroller. Also, we live in a walk-up building.
-Henry is surprisingly energetic and fearless. The biggest thing to watch out for is him eating trash or kids trying to feed him.
-No poop scooping required!

Amanda added that although Henry doesn't show affection like a dog (or recognize his own name, he IS a turtle after all), he is very curious about people: "He gets into everything. He always comes to the door when anyone comes over and follows anyone repairing anything (Time Warner guys, my super, etc.) He loves baths and getting his head and chin rubbed. He also scratches at the refrigerator for food and snuggles for warmth in the winter."

But that's not all! You might as well ask what Henry can't do, because there's so much he can do.

He can wear pumpkins on his head:

Pumpkinhead. #tortoise #turtle #sulcata #pumpkin #halloween #tortoisesofinstagram #cute #petstagram

A photo posted by Henry (@thenotortoisebig) on

He can make children happy:

He can skateboard:

He can get stuck under benches:

Shhh. I'm hiding. #tortoise #turtle #sulcata #centralpark #nyc #tortoisesofig #reptilesofig #petsofinstagram

A photo posted by Henry (@thenotortoisebig) on

He takes sponge baths:

He can pull you over for speeding:

He's definitely a hit in the park. "People LOVE Henry. He draws large crowds and the NYPD has pulled us over twice to take pictures with him," Amanda said. "He really brings out the best in people. It's the most I ever talk to strangers in NYC — and it reminds me that most people in the city are friendly."

On second thought, you definitely shouldn't apply to be Henry's walker. Forget this ever happened. Next time you see me, don't be surprised if it looks something like this.

[h/t Hunter Walker]