Hello, men of the world! Is David Beckham's bodacious H&M ad making you feel down about, er, down there? Are you envious of Jon Hamm's ham? Would you consider dropping thousands of dollars to look a little more like these well-endowed KINGS OF MEN in the lower torso department? It appears penis-enhancing surgery is on the rise, and the media's starting to blame Becks and other able-bodied celebs for stirring up the penis envy.

A London plastic surgeon says he's seen an uptick in patients coming in for penoplasty, a procedure in which fat from other parts of the body is injected in the penis to increase its girth. "For millennia, having a bigger penis has been a status symbol, a sign of strength or masculinity, and it’s only very recently that men have been able to do something about that," Dr. Roberto Viel, who says he performs about 15 of these surgeries a week, told the Sun. "If there’s a solution, why not use it?"

Well, cost, for one thing. A lengthening surgery at Viel's clinic costs 4,000 pounds; for the penny-pinchers, there's a slightly more economical girth-increasing surgery for 3,850 pounds. Plus, there are a few unsightly risks involved. According to New York plastic surgeon Dr. Adam Hamaway, a botched penoplasty can make a penis look like "a round, lumpy ball," which, if you're wondering is exactly what the ladies like. "They have an erection and it looks a little wider and lumpy. It doesn't get hard," he told the Daily News in an article peppered with pictures of Becks and Hamm.

But hey! But what's a little lumpy penis risk as compared to looking like all those undie-clad Beckhams and peeking Hamms hanging around? "I was thrilled with the results and felt like a man for the first time in my life," one penoplasty survivor told the Sun. "I’ve just started dating a wonderful girl. I’ve not told her about the op but I hope if things get a bit more serious and I decide to tell her, she’ll understand.” And if viewing Beckham's physique makes this surgery sound appealing to you, well, now you know how us XX-ers feel every time Kate Upton plays with a penguin on the cover of Sports Illustrated.