What with military strikes, natural disasters and other real life stuff going on, we completely forgot about the whole Charlie Sheen public breakdown tour. Sadly, neither Sheen nor his rapidly dwindling fanbase forgot, and last night was the first stop of Sheen's "Violent Torpedo of Truth/Defeat is Not An Option" traveling show in Detroit. And as you can imagine, everyone had an
excellent, life-affirming absolutely miserable experience.
By all accounts, Sheen bombed big time in the Motor City, the first stop of his 20-city tour. There was so much booing, he ended the show 20 minutes early. "75% poorly produced videos 25% @charliesheen on stage. My row once full now has 5 ppl," tweeted FreepMike. Things started out disastrously when Sheen was forced to come onstage to ask people to stop booing his warm up comic Kurt Fox. Some Goddesses made out on stage, Sheen burned his Two and a Half Men t-shirt, and then addressed his congregation from a presidential-style podium that proclaimed “Warlock States of Sheen.”
The night descended into one long, terrifically unfunny and sustained paranoid rant; Sheen mocked Sarah Palin and Thomas Jefferson, told jokes about crack, and generally alienated an audience who spent over $80 each to see him. There was video of him playing Call of Duty, there was a nonsensical question-and-answer in which he didn't answer half the questions, and there was live tweeting from the stage. Even when Sheen premiered the video for the song he produced with Snoop Dogg, people weren't having it. Throughout the night, disappointed fans showed their appreciation with cascades of boos as they slowly filtered out of the awkward, pained proceedings.
But what did they expect from a coke-addled, mentally disturbed egomaniac? From what we've read and seen, Sheen did an accurate impression of his absurd "performances" from his morning talk show breakdown from last month. Even Sheen acknowledged that he had no idea what he was doing: "Is anybody else as confused by this shit as I am? " he asked the audience at one point, brushing against self-consciousness. Entertainment Weekly has five suggestions on how to improve the show ("hire a writer"), although they don't list "shut it down immediately," which surprised us.
The next stop for the show is tonight in Chicago, which could be a litmus test for whether the show goes on any further after the Detroit fiasco. According to TMZ, the rest of the tour was already not selling well—they have between 200-300 seats available per show—and "tonight's performance could send the rest of the tour into a tailspin. And staffers at several ticket agencies tell us there has been a rapid rise in the number of people trying to unload their tickets since last night's disastrous performance."