This Sunday marks the return of National Go Topless Day, a celebration of women's legal right to bare their breasts in public. Even in Times Square. Never forget: no matter what the morality police might have you believe, it is completely legal to go topless in NYC. Seeing women's breasts will not permanently scar the children. But it is still illegal to go completely nude in public, so wear your Never Nudes.
The annual event, which was founded by a very sexy UFO religion, has become a venerable NYC tradition, albeit one that sometimes attracts awkward, creepy onlookers. As ever, don't act like a gawking tourist if you do see (deep breath) breasts in public. But also keep in mind that this year could be a little more intense than usual, thanks to the incredibly silly war on breasts that City Hall is current waging against the "painted ladies" of Times Square.
According to the event's BoobMap, this year's gathering will start at 1 p.m. with a street parade beginning at Columbus Circle. Around 2:30 p.m., after going through Times Square, the parade will end at Bryant Park. There will be speeches at the park starting at 3 p.m. Women have the choice of going fully topless, or wearing red tape "to hide their (infamous!) nipples." Men are encouraged to wear a bikini top to show their support (which will be available there).
And if you happen run into de Blasio while he's addressing "quality-of-life issues" around town, let him know he's a great leader and a gallant American.