Here they come... It's hard to believe, but this month one of the most irresistibly ridiculous events in NYC will celebrate its tenth anniversary. Idiotarod, the clandestinely-organized and unsanctioned costumed foot race will once again flood the sidewalks of an undisclosed part of Brooklyn. (The route hasn't been officially announced but come on, it's in Brooklyn.)
At first glance, the cynical layman may be tempted to lump the Idiotarod in with other fratastic displays of mass exhibitionism like Santacon and the No Pants Subway Ride. But the level of zany creativity and hardcore endurance required of Idiotarod participants sets it apart from lesser flash mobs. You're never too old for this shit, we hope. Here's the official announcement, which just came in over the wires:
Today, the Department of Homeland Absurdity announced that annual New York City Idiotarod will take place on January 25th, with the starting point to be announced the evening prior. This year’s event marks the 10th anniversary of the event, which brings teams of costume-clad racers with themed shopping carts to the streets of New York City for reasons few understand.
After a relatively disaster-free 2013 in the city of New York, last year’s management, the Federal Emergency Racing Agency (FERA), has licensed the race to the multi-discipline scientific research organization, IDIOT Labs. This agreement allows IDIOT Labs to oversee and study the event. Purely in the interest of science, the organization with have free reign to examine all facets of the race and racers, with the hope of answering age-old questions like, “Why anyone would want to do this?” and, “How can they seriously be out in this weather wearing that?”
Pitting racer against racer and cart against cart, the annual Idiotarod event strives to showcase the creativity of NYC's underground. The event awards cash prizes for originality, imagination and artistry alongside wacky hijinks, zany antics and unabashed bribery. As established in prior years, Idiotarod X will not tolerate food throwing and other behaviors that put the non-racing population or property at risk. The race will conclude with an awards celebration at a location to be announced.
Entry: For legal reasons, all teams must fill out the official racing registration and medical release form, available from email@example.com. All forms must be received by 11:59pm ET on the Thursday prior to the race (January 23rd), however due to the potential for bureaucratic snafus, earlier completion and submission is highly suggested. Incomplete, illegible or ill-tempered forms will be rejected. Entry responses will be judged, with a prize awarded based on expediency, hilarity and originality.
Start place/time: Idiotarod X will commence at 12 noon on January 25, 2014, rain, snow, sleet, slush, arctic vortex or shine. The official starting location will be released the evening prior to the event.
Check-in: Upon arrival at the starting location, each team is required to check in with an IDIOT Labs official for their race package. There is a $5 per team member processing fee that will be collected at the initial check in. This is a 100% volunteer-driven event, and collected processing fees will go directly to the prize pool and event administration.
Prizes: Under the direction of IDIOT Labs, official prizes, both monetary and sentimental, will be awarded in various arbitrary categories.
Contact: To race, volunteer or submit press inquiries, please email firstname.lastname@example.org
For additional Information or to join the conversation, Idiotarod can be found on Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/groups/IdiotarodNYC/ or Twitter.
You have a little over a week to steal a shopping cart and enlist your friends to transform it into a giant flaming catapult.