A San Francisco-bound United flight at Dulles Airport outside DC was evacuated around 12:41 p.m. today after experiencing engine problems. "The emergency chutes were deployed," an airport spokesperson told the Washington Post, and everyone—including passenger and Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg—slid down to safety. Will Ginsburg now have to recuse herself from Slip 'N Slide v. Jetliner Puffy Slides, Inc.? more ›

Last night, United Airlines' computer system crashed—"a network connectivity issue" supposedly (whoever unplugged the Cat 5 cable is probably in trouble)—which resulted in complete chaos for its passengers. Planes couldn't depart, flights were canceled, and reservations and ticket processing systems were down. As one resigned passenger Tweeted, "Cutting losses: after 15 hrs (9 @ LAX), 2 cancelled flights, 3hrs on phone & $200 in cab fare, I gave up on @United & cancelled all flights." more ›

Airborne onanism is costly these days! Alleged wanker Kyle Pearce, a 25-year-old Floridian (Go Gators!), was arrested on May 19th after witnesses saw him remove his penis and masturbate "to the point of ejaculation" during a United Airlines flight to Denver. An 18-year-old woman sitting across the aisle from Pearce told police, "I heard a noise and looked over and saw his penis. He was wearing jeans tucked into cowboy boots... He told me his name was Kyle. He ejaculated & got some on the seat." Wow, that Kyle sure knows how to break the ice! more ›

The MTA has removed a United Airlines ad seen on a subway entrance across the street from the World Trade Center site, after some passersby said it was inappropriate. The ad copy, which is part of a national campaign, reads, "You're Going To Like Where We Land," which, considering where United Flight 175 landed on 9/11, seems a tad tone deaf. But it also seems to be an honest mistake; United's contract with the MTA and its third-party vendor doesn't specify the geographical location of each ad, and the MTA moved swiftly to take it down yesterday. more ›

After temporarily reinstating the flight numbers for the flights that crashed into the World Trade Center and at Shankville, Pennsylvania on September 11, 2001, United Airlines apologized, blaming it on a technical error, "We apologize for the error. The numbers were inadvertently reinstated." more ›

Oh, United Airlines, you know just how to treat a customer. Instead of wrecking luggage, this time the airline attempted to force a musician to buy his cello a first class seat. Maybe they were just worried if it broke in coach they'd have another YouTube sensation on their hands. more ›

Isn't is nice how airlines continue to come up with new ways to surprise us? Like, hey, your dog is dead! Or, hey, we're gonna make this trip take 10 extra hours, get to know your neighbor! Or that time they let you sleep on the empty plane. The latest: the luggage you carefully chose and packed for your trip has been inexplicably and utterly destroyed. more ›

Like many airplane passengers, Ginger McGuire fell asleep during her one hour flight from Michigan to Philadelphia on Tuesday night. But when the plane landed at 12:30 a.m., she didn't wake up, and kept on sawing wood as the other passengers left the plane and the flight crew walked away, locking the doors behind them! When the heavy sleeper finally awoke around 4 a.m., she was all alone. But instead of saying to herself, "Hey, free plane!" McGuire paced and worried. more ›

United Airlines and Continental Airlines have agreed to merge to create the world's largest carrier by passenger traffic. According to Bloomberg News, the deal will be "stock swap valued at more than $3 billion" and "United and Continental together would take the top spot in global traffic from Delta Air Lines Inc., with hubs in New York and Washington and the most traffic among U.S. carriers on high- fare Atlantic and Pacific routes." The merged company will keep United's name and base in Chicago; the NY Times says the deal, should it be approved, "would give the airlines the muscle to fend off low-cost rivals at home and to take on foreign carriers abroad." more ›

What happens in Vegas may stay in Vegas, but what happens on your flight there will end up in the papers! The Daily News reports that passengers on a United Airlines flight bound for Sin City had to tackle a New York man who approached the cockpit door with a large bag while in the air on Saturday. Six passengers restrained him after he tried to open a side exit door, and then started banging on the cockpit door. Around 5 p.m. the flight made an emergency landing in Denver, where the unruly man was arrested and interviewed by the FBI — he is currently undergoing medical evaluation. more ›

There are early reports of an emergency landing at Newark Liberty International Airport shortly after 9 this morning. WABC reported that United Airlines flight 634, arriving at Newark from Chicago, had issues with its landing gear and was forced to make an emergency landing. The flight, from Chicago's O'Hare Airport had a scheduled departure of 6:01 AM and had 53 passengers. Twitter user Debbie Frank updates, "On runway. Newark just closed. Another aircraft with bad landing- mechanical issues. Emergency vehicles. Zero idea just how bad." Jim Hoffer of WABC says it was a right wing landing gear issue and that an air traffic controller says there were no injuries, but the emergency exit chutes were deployed. The plane, an Airbus A319 apparently arrived just 15 minutes late, if not at the actual gate. At this time, it's unclear why the landing gear failed. more ›

On this day 49 years ago, two planes collided in midair above Staten Island — causing the United Airlines flight to crash into a Park Slope intersection (7th Avenue and Sterling Street) and a TWA aircraft's wreckage to land in Miller Field on Staten Island. The crash killed 134 passengers as well as 6 people on the ground — one young boy survived the crash, but died at the NY Methodist hospital the next day. The Bowery Boys note there are still scars to be seen on Sterling Place, and more images of the aftermath can be seen at the Brooklyn Public LIbrary. more ›

But it was a false alarm! According to Reuters, a crew on a United flight from Los Angeles to JFK Airport (with Cairo as the final destination) was suspicious of two Middle Eastern men because "one of the men got up to use the plane's restroom just before take-off, ignoring orders from the flight crew to remain in his seat." more ›

More troubles from the airline sector: United Airlines and Continental Airlines announced measures to cut costs through decreasing its workforces and total number of flights. This comes as other carriers have announced higher fares, less flights, and additional charges. more ›

An unidentified man was forcibly removed from a United Airlines at JFK before it took off last night because he wouldn’t sit down and stop praying. A San Francisco author named Ori Brafman, who was on the flight, told WNBC the Orthodox Jewish man ignored instructions from flight attendants to remain in his seat. During the minutes before take off, he walked to the back of the plane to pray, and when he continued to defy attendants' orders, they summoned airport security. more ›

When it comes to driving routes for a JFK airport pickup, George Costanza advocates taking the Grand Central to the Van Wyck, deriding Kramer’s L.I.E. route as a “suicide mission.” In the current New York Magazine cover story, “How to Escape Airport Hell”, the editors invited chauffeur Kevin Sullivan to weigh in. While he comes down squarely on Costanza’s side, he also shares some invaluable alternative routes to all three airports in the unlikely... more ›

Toys R Us cannot live down the tempest in a nursing bra cup. Last week, breastfeeding mother Chelsi Meyerson claimed employees at the Times Square store harassed her to stop nursing her son in the store, urging her to move to a private room. more ›