Proving what we already knew about those Standard Oil-emulating, stripper tears-drinking, tax-dodging, climate science-denying bastards, a study published in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences suggests that rich people are more likely to lie, cheat, and break the law without compunction, for their personal gain. The study's abstract notes "that upper-class individuals’ unethical tendencies are accounted for, in part, by their more favorable attitudes toward greed." more ›

There's nothing we love more than when Science goes out of its way to conduct decade-long studies to tell us things we already know, like the fact marijuana doesn't hurt your lungs, or women don't like sex because of supply and demand. Now, a recent study has confirmed something we've always known in our hearts: our depression is linked to our mothers. "Freud comes in to this," said co-author and psychiatrist Dr. Igor Galynker of Beth Israel Medical Center. "He blamed everything on the mother and it turns out the mother is absolutely the strongest gauge of depression you have." more ›

Instead of Twitter-crying about your landlord forgetting to turn your one wheezing radiator on, you should be thanking him for getting you ready for swimsuit season. New studies have revealed the existence of brown fat in humans, which burns calories "like a furnace" when the body gets cold. Look for Brown Fat Smoothies soon at a McDonald's near you. more ›

According to a 20-year study [pdf] federally funded by the National Institute for Drug Abuse and published in the Journal of the American Medical Association, marijuana, the illicit substance grown naturally from the earth that around 100 people every hour are arrested for possessing, doesn't harm your lungs. So what was true in 1972, 1995, and 1999, remains true today! We're awaiting the emergency press conference in the Rose Garden, and a tipster tells us that Burning Spear's tour bus has appeared on Pennsylvania Ave. more ›

Is it time for SpongeBob to move to Adult Swim? According to a report [PDF] entitled "The Effect of Fast-Paced Cartoons" in the American Academy of Pediatrics's journal, four-year-olds who watched 9 minutes of SpongeBob SquarePants performed significantly worse in mental function tests than those who watched "educational television" like PBS's Caillou. However, those who watched PBS described being "so bored my eyes hurt real bad" and had an unslakable thirst for complimentary tote bags. more ›

Any idiot will tell you that eating chocolate protects your skin. This is just hard science, like gravity or magnets. But Uncle Science now says that eating chocolate can lower your blood pressure and reduce the risk of certain cardiovascular diseases. Finally, watching TV and eating Triple Double Oreos will cancel each other out. more ›

According to the UK's Telegraph, a "finding" in the British Medical Journal states that cyclists shouldn't be forced to wear helmets, because "they may give up cycling altogether and lose the health benefits of regular exercise." Wow! British Medical Journal? Findings? Excuse us while we shake our luxurious mane in this deliciously dangerous breeze! But what's the science behind this proclamation? A poll of 1,439 people on the BMJ's website "believed that the use of cycle helmets by adults should not be mandatory in the UK." Ah, those internet commenters/poll users: always looking out for our health. more ›

A recent study conducted by Columbia University's National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse (CASA) revealed that 9 out of 10 Americans who are medically addicted to substances began using them before age 18. One out of 4 Americans who began using before 18 are addicted, compared to 1 in 25 who begin at 21. The study [pdf] claims that adolescent substance abuse is "America's #1 Public Health Problem" because the "costs to federal, state and local governments of substance abuse, which has its roots in adolescence, are at least $468 billion per year." more ›

The World Heath Organization' International Agency for Research on Cancer today announced that it now classifies radiofrequency electromagnetic fields as possibly carcinogenic to humans [PDF]. What does that mean in English? The agency now considers mobile phone use to be in the same "carcinogenic hazard" category as lead, engine exhaust, DDT and coffee. Our theories about how Scully got cancer have clearly been vindicated! more ›

We already knew that breastfeeding can be a touchy issue with lawsuits, Facebook feuds and subway rallies (also toys)but now a new study has come along which suggests that although breastfeeding may be economical and healthy, the social and workplace costs can be potentially great to mothers. According to the study breastfeeding mothers are viewed by potential employers as being "significantly less competent in general, in math and work specifically." more ›

Lately, it seems like all "scientific" studies seem to only be good for two things: learning that dumb stuff you already knew was true is true, and learning that good/bad behavior is the opposite of what you expect it to be. Appropriately, two new studies fall into each category quite comfortably: according to a new report by Drugfree.org, teenagers don't think binge drinking is a big deal. And according to a new study by the University of Copenhagen, wasting time browsing the internet might be good for your job! more ›

The artificial turf being used to replace natural grass in NYC parks has been pointed out as a source of unhealthful emissions, but it's also just plain hot. The Daily News dispatched reporters with thermometers to five City parks with artificial grass and found that urban athletes had more to fear than ill-fitting footwear when it comes to blistered feet.

Over two mildly warm days last month, The News took surface temperature readings at five synthetic fields across the city accompanied by NYC Park Advocates, a group that has been critical of the fake grass. more ›