Ladies, meet Martin Berres, a 62-year-old single man who describes himself on his MySpace page (martynycforever!) as a "classy native New Yorker." His heroes include Niccolò Machiavelli, and he is "in better shape and health than most men 1/3 my years. Do not let the age mislead you; I am young in heart and looks... I consider myself to be a find." Marty would love to meet you provided you meet the "paramount" requirement of "outside beauty" and "inside beauty." Oh, and you should also have lots of money and jewelry he can pawn—according to two women who say Berres swindled them out of $400,000. more ›

Stay classy, Scarsdale: In the same week that the Mad Mom roadside abandonment story made headlines, another Scarsdale mom is in the news for stealing an estimated $12 million in gold from the Queens jewelry manufacturer where she worked as a vault manager. And according to her own confession, she did it one piece at a time over the course of six years! 50-year-old Teresa Tambunting's gold-hoarding hobby went unnoticed until January, when auditors at Jacmel Jewelry's Long Island City headquarters reported losses over the normal 3% rate. more ›

In these desperate times, even basic necessities like groceries are becoming a luxury for more and more New Yorkers. Thankfully, there's a way to adapt to a reduced income without sacrificing your appetite—assuming you don't have any ethical qualms about theft. One local freelancer who often subsists on a very limited budget has for years eaten like a gourmand by stealing groceries from fine supermarkets. This person agreed to speak with us on the condition of anonymity, for obvious reasons, and shared some invaluable tips for hungry shoppers in search the best five finger discounts in town. more ›

That Saks is den of thieves! First a jewelry saleswomen is accused of bilking the store over $1 million, then a suit salesmen is arrested for stealing from office buildings, now a "public-relations finance manager" has been arrested on charges she stole more than $680,000 from the department store. 52-year-old Ava John's job required her to pay outside vendors hired by Saks for special events at the store. According to the Daily News, John allegedly spent the last five years creating fake invoices for her friends and relatives, who would get a taste of the loot in exchange for cashing the checks. She may have raked in more than $680,000 in the scam, which has also implicated her 32-year-old niece, who allegedly helped by incorporating a bogus bridal consultancy, the Post reports. more ›

A former Saks Fifth Avenue suit salesman allegedly used his employee-discount threads to glide past security in Midtown office buildings and steal cash and credit cards from empty offices. 34-year-old Edward Proctor was arrested last week and accused of lunchtime stealing sprees at CBS offices and another building on 49th Street in May and June. “I was in the next room eating lunch when he went behind my desk," one victim tells the Post. Proctor successfully robbed workers on the same floor at CBS twice in the same month; police only tracked him down after he allegedly used one of the credit cards to pay for his parking at a garage. He’s out on $40,000 bail, which, one hopes, wasn’t paid with plastic. more ›