Start planning now, because you have only a few scant hours left on this earth to accomplish whatever puny human goals you're clinging on to. No—it's not mysterious green goo, or birds falling from the sky, or a nine-month early New Year's—this one is serious.
Anyone who knows anything about the science, the future, and/or Arnold Schwarzenegger knows that as of 8:11 p.m. tonight, April 19th, 2011 Skynet, the military-designed artificial intelligence system, will become self-aware and turn against its human creators.
Apocalypse Now: Skynet Becomes Self-Aware Tonight
Calling All Chop Shops: Seen This Car?
John Schnatter, founder of the Papa John’s pizza chain, wants his Bitchin’ Camaro back, and he’ll even give you $25,000 if you’ve got it. The 47-year-old delivery pizza company’s creator apparently exchanged his gold, double racing-striped 1972 Z28 Camaro (seen here) in 1984 for $1600 in seed capital. He's been a little down about that since, but the rest is history: Papa John’s bloomed into a worldwide franchise with more than 3,400 locations, including one in Flatlands that’s currently basking in the glory of an immaculate 5-star Yelp rating. According to Wikipedia, all Papa John’s locations are linked together through Skynet “the advanced dynamic resource control infrastructure in the fast food industry,” modeled on NORAD's Cheyenne Mountain Operations Center. Ah, dual-use technology. Schnatter has embarked on an ultra-promotional road trip to find his long lost wheels; the man will be in NY on June 16th or 17th and for whatever reason, may personally deliver your order during that time. Unless the Rise of the Machines happens first.

