We warned you about this last week, but you refused to petition your local congressman, and now here we are: below, you can hatewatch the "Sh*t Park Slope Parents Say" video, written and performed by Katie Goodman and Soren Kisiel, with additional ideas from Susan Fox, Julie Kay, and the contributors to ParkSlopeParents.com. Sure, they mention lactation consultants, existential parking woes, co-ops, kindergarten competitiveness, and other familiar themes of entitlement—but how could they leave out babies in bars?!
Hatewatch: The "Sh*t Park Slope Parents Say" Video
You've Been Warned: There Is A "Sh*t Park Slope Parents Say" Video In The Making
Some Park Slope parents—inspired by the never-ending "Sh*t Blank Says" meme—have been conspiring together to create a "Sh*t Park Slope Parents Say" video that really nails down their unique culture.
That's So Brooklyn: Park Slope Sex Shop Now Delivering Toys By Bike
The Babeland outpost in Park Slope is offering up a new service for Brooklynites who don't want to get out of bed: they'll deliver sex toys to your door, and by bike! According to the Brooklyn Paper (who just happened to find out about it?), the service costs a whopping 30 bucks, but it's free on Valentine's Day.
A Food & Drink Tour Of Brooklyn's South Slope
At the end of last year we took a food and drink tour of Bedford-Stuyvesant, and in what will be an ongoing series of exploring the city's neighborhoods, we've now given the same treatment to South Slope. Click through to explore...
Betty White's Prank Show Spotted In Park Slope
Betty White's team of senior pranksters have been spotted in Park Slope. The 90-year-old actress has a new show called Off Their Rockers, which is basically Punk'd but with White instead of Ashton Kutcher. FIPS noticed that in a recent episode of the hidden-camera prank show (which airs on NBC) takes place in Park Slope! Even though it's mostly filmed in Los Angeles.
What's Really Happening To Park Slope's Southpaw?
Southpaw's owner tells us why they're closing, and what Park Slope's music scene will be missing without them.
Inside Park Slope's Pretty New BBQ Joint Fort Reno Provisions
Park Slope, barbecue destination? Why not! Not only is Dinosaur BBQ heading to the 'hood, but this week brings the debut of Fort Reno Provisions, a boozy new 'que house on Union Street from the owner of nearby Palo Santo. Brisket by the pound, anyone?
Park Slope's Southpaw May Be Closing Next Month
Is Park Slope mainstay Southpaw closing in February? According to Brooklyn Vegan, the venue—which opened in 2002—will shut its doors on February 20th. One of the bookers at the club Tweeted, I can't believe I'm writing this. Southpaw will be closing its doors for good Feb. 20th. The venue's been sold." Which currently seems to be the main confirmation.
Dinosaur BBQ Roars Into Park Slope
Park Slope, prepare your bibs: some heavy new BBQ hitters are heading your way soon. Ben Popken reports that Dinosaur BBQ, the Syracuse-based chain with a popular location in Harlem, is moving into a defunct warehouse on a desolate stretch on Union Street.
Take A Look At Talde, Park Slope's New Pan-Asian Spot
A few weeks ago, we posted the menu for Talde, the new Asian fusion joint in Park Slope from former Top Cheffer Dale Talde and neighborhood favorites David Massoni and John Bush (of Thistle Hill Tavern). The restaurant is now officially up and running, turning out plates of Hawaiian pork buns, oyster-bacon pad Thai, Korean fried chicken and more, plus wine, beer and cocktails like Brooklyn Sling (gin, Luxardo, pineapple, house-made grenadine and bitters) and the Pacquiao Punch, a top-secret recipe that pays homage to Manny Pacquiao, the Filipino boxing champion, statesman and Talde’s personal hero.
A Little Look Back At Brooklyn's Montauk Club
The Montauk Club is a private social club in Park Slope that's been around since the late 1800s—founded by Charles Pratt, Richard Schermerhorn, and Edwin C. Litchfield in 1889. In later years, it would come to host prominent political figures like Dwight D. Eisenhower and John F. Kennedy. And over the past few years or so, it's come back to life with a strong focus on Brooklyn's under-35 set. To enter, you must be a member, and each month the Club approves new applications. They explain on their website, "The majority of our under 35s are unmarried—and in keeping with Brooklyn’s reputation—good looking. But our older members are holding their own and the mix of ages and the diversity of points of view make for engaging conversation."
Talde Will Serve Hawaiian Pork Buns And Oyster-Bacon Pad Thai To Park Slope
Former Buddakan cook and Top Chef contestant Dale Talde is opening his own place, called, appropriately, Talde, in Park Slope this weekend, bringing what appears to be a random but promising mish-mash of Asian flavors and techniques to a neighborhood not typically known for envelope-pushing restaurants.
Park Slope Has Unique Methods Of Christmas Tree Disposal
It may be too late to keep that sweet sweet mulch for yourself, but you can still drop your tree off to be recycled for MulchFest. If we had to guess which neighborhoods would enthusiastically participate, Park Slope would be at the top of the list. But Gothamist operative Kristina Monllos snapped photos of multiple trees sitting untied on top of cars, and one cyclist dragging the carcass of their evergreen down the street. "Maybe Park Slope families have no idea how to properly clean up after Christmas?" Monllos writes. And is that any way to treat a $200 fraser fir?
Still Tickets Left For Nueske's Smoked Meats Tasting Dinner At Bark Hot Dogs
On Wednesday night Nueske’s, the beloved smoked meats purveyor, will be taking over Bark Hot Dogs in Park Slope for a five-course tasting menu paired with various Sixpoint beers, including a new beer that hasn't been released yet, the Mad Scientist #7. Bark says they'll be incorporating products from the Wisconsin-based smokehouse for each course, and Vera Obias, the pastry chef at Buddakan, will round out the meal by making a special bacon-infused dessert: Almond Brioche Bread Pudding with Smoked Bacon Maple Sauce & Vanilla Rum Ice Cream.
Baby, 4 Others "Clinging To Life" After Park Slope Blaze Caused By Cigarette In Bed
Members of the family who were trapped in a Brooklyn row house fire on Thanksgiving are in critical condition in NYC hospitals. According to the Post, 8-month-old Josiah Alexis, his mother Justine Alexis, uncle Jonathan Alexis and his aunt's husband George DeJesus are all at New York Presbyterian Cornell Weill Medical Center with ventilators; the baby's aunt, Jasmine Alexis (twin sister to Justine, wife of DeJesus) is at Jacobi Medical Center. This news comes as fire official described how the fire, started by someone smoking in bed, spread across the President Street home in Park Slope.
Park Slope Fire Caused By Smoking In Bed, Five (Including Baby) Injured
A fast-moving fire at a Park Slope row house on left five people were injured, including an 8-month-old baby boy and a man who were in cardiac arrest by the time firefighters reached them. Fire department officials say the blaze, which occurred in a three-story walk-up on President Street between 4th and 5th Avenues, was caused by a smoking in bed.
Man Stabbed On Subway In Park Slope Fought Over Anti-Semitic Slurs
More details have emerged about the man who was stabbed on a Park Slope subway yesterday—while initial reports said that the incident occurred on the G train, the Daily News says it was an F train, and the spat began over some anti-Semitic comments.
Man Stabbed On G Train In Park Slope
A man was stabbed during a fight either on the G train or on the G train platform near Park Slope last night, according to two slightly conflicting reports. Either way, it sounds pretty ugly.
Park Slope Red Sauce Institution Aunt Suzie's To Close
After 25 years in business, the homey red sauce Italian restaurant Aunt Suzie's is going to the great cannoli in the sky. The owner, Irene LoRe, posted an open letter on Park Slope's Fifth Avenue Business Improvement District website announcing her decision to call it quits on January 1st. LoRe, who is also the executive director of the Fifth Avenue BID, opened Aunt Suzie's when Fifth Avenue was a very different (i.e. seedy) scene, and the closure marks the end of an era.
Alleged Groper To Cops: I Do This Sometimes
The man arrested for allegedly groping an 18-year-old woman in Sunset Park Monday night has reportedly confessed to police, and apparently he's wanted for a similar incident in Chinatown in 2007. Police sources tell Murray Weiss at DNAinfo that Adolfo Martinez, 26, blamed his alleged perversion on a car accident that sparked "urges." Martinez reportedly told investigators during questioning, "I have a problem. I get these little urges... This is all I do." Another source tells Weiss that Martinez said, "I do this sometimes."
"Clorox Crew" On ATM Robbing Rampage Across Brooklyn
A group of masked ATM robbers are on the loose across Sunset Park, Bay Ridge, Bensonhurst and Park Slope, identifiable only by their signature move: splashing the crime scene with bleach. Wait, where have we seen this so-called "cash'n'splash" move before? Oh, right in that Ben Affleck movie The Town! Kids really do imitate celebrities these days.
Park Slope Library Renovations Are Taking Pretty Much Forever
The Park Slope Library has already been closed for renovations for two years, and it's showing no signs of reopening anytime soon, frustrating many locals who say the library is an important part of the neighborhood. Think of the children!
Police Showing Prisoners Video Of Brooklyn Serial Rapist
In an effort to find a break in the case of an assailant (or possibly two) who police believe has raped one woman and sexually assaulted at least ten across Park Slope, Sunset Park, and Bay Ridge, the NYPD is showing footage of victims being approached to prisoners as they're processed through Central Booking. "We have some videos that show victims being approached," Commissioner Kelly tells the Post. "We're asking people perhaps they recognize a trait or walk on an individual."
Atlantic Yards Foe In Fire Fight With Neighbor Over New Home Addition
Daniel Goldstein, the Brooklyn gadfly who made a name for himself in his relentless and ultimately losing battle against developer Bruce Ratner's Atlantic Yards project, was ultimately forced out of his home in Prospect Heights through eminent domain. True, he won a $3 million settlement from Ratner when he finally agreed to move, but, ironically, he's now in a nasty fight in his new neighborhood, where his neighbor is on the warpath over an extension he wants to build on his Park Slope house. Is he his own Bruce Ratner?
Sexual Assault Suspect Arrested In Brooklyn, But May Be Copycat
A Brooklyn man was arrested yesterday and accused of sexually assaulting at least three women over the last month. Federico Chamorro Yax, 22, has been charged with assault, sex abuse and forcible touching in the assaults. But police are not yet sure whether Yax is the same person as the man/men who have been terrorizing women around Park Slope for the past few months, and warn that he may be a copycat.
Park Slope Food Co-op: Your One-Stop Viagra Shop?
Is the Park Slope Food Co-op struggling to retain its long-standing members? Has it been forced to expand into more upwardly-mobile business ventures? Mike Epstein noticed something strange when he was googling the Co-op today: "Was the @foodcoop website hacked? Googling it shows an ad for Viagra in the search snippet." And as you can see here, that still seems to be the case. We doubt that the Co-op is that hard-on for new advertisers, but as long as the Viagra isn't made in Israel, we guess anything is possible.
Cops To Brooklyn Women: Wear Skirts And Rapist Will Target You
As women in Park Slope, Sunset Park and Bay Ridge remain on edge with two, possible more, sexual assault suspects on the loose, community members are trying to reassure women by starting volunteer efforts to escort women from the subway. On the other hand, the police are telling some women to stop asking for it by wearing skirts and shorts.
Inside Fleisher's, The New Park Slope Meatopia
Jessica and Josh Applestone have finally opened their much anticipated Fleisher's outpost in Park Slope at Fifth Avenue and Sackett. Yesterday we stopped by the soon-to-be-hotspot and chatted with the couple, who also run the popular upstate butcher shop. "This neighborhood makes a lot sense for us," Jessica stated simply. "It's our demographic." Yup: Park Slope residents do a great deal of home delivery, and in case you hadn't noticed, the neighborhood is crawling with parents concerned about organic food. The Applestones should do just fine here.
Passive-Aggressive Park Slope Parking Battle Hits Crescendo
No amount of "Park(ing) Days" can mask the ugly truth that locating parking in the city is the worst—and going to a garage is an admission of defeat most drivers will do anything to avoid. So when one Park Slope resident's car broke down on her block, she was relieved that her car was at least sitting in a legal spot in front of her neighbor's house. But the neighbor wasn't happy when the car sat there for two weeks, as the note above, which was left in the car's windshield, suggests. You can read the whole account of their argument here, but here's the real question: who is acting more passively-aggressively between the two?
Brooklyn DA: "Aware Of Increase In Gang Activity" In Parks
Following reports of a "turf war" between residents and roving bands of teenagers in Brower Park and the Park Slope Playground, Brooklyn District Attorney Charles Hynes is seeking to assuage fears that his office is out of touch with the issue. "We are definitely aware of the increase in gang activity in parks and playgrounds," Hynes's spokesperson Jerry Schmetterer told the Daily News. According to Schmetterer, the DA's Gang's Bureau is "monitoring their activity. And we are in touch with the community about it."

