As the world mourns the marital vows of Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz, we wonder: what will become of their son Bronx? Is he being torn apart by divorce like Robert Moses once tore apart his namesake borough? Is Bronx Wentz our burned-out tenement, our spiritless public housing tower of 2011? more ›

Upon hearing that Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz named their baby "Bronx" (Bronx Mowgli Wentz, to be exact), we asked Bronx Borough President Adolfo Carrión, Jr. what he thought. He told us: “It’s great to hear that Pete Wentz and Ashlee Simpson named their son after such a great place. I hope baby Bronx gets the opportunity to see what a beautiful and eclectic borough he was named after.” But just what are the chances of these three taking a family trip to the borough? At the very least, the MTA really should start making onesies so they can make him look all legit. more ›