For reasons that are not entirely clear, someone is egging Mike Myers into adapting his once-popular, now pretty dated Austin Powers character into a Broadway musical. The only people benefiting from the potential deal are Myers, for whom this will likely be a total cash cow, and the legions of Midwestern tourists who will feed him. Why can't there just be more singing Mormons on stage instead?
Yeah, Baby? Austin Powers Might Be Coming To Broadway
Brooklyn Library Goes XXX
This is what you get for not keeping up with the digital age! A Brooklyn grandmother rented a VHS copy of Austin Powers at the Borough Park library branch for her grandkids to watch, and someone had spliced it with "long pornographic scenes" during the credits, The Post reports. Esther Klein put in a call to assemblyman Dov Hikind about the x-rated rental, and he's now demanding local libraries ban VHS. Here we were worried about the sand when the real danger to our children is the local library! Hikind declared, "This is unbelievable. The bottom line is that the local library can be unsafe for young children. It's pretty sick stuff." He added that children can psychologically suffer forever from this type of exposure. But what about grandma renting a PG-13 movie (for nudity and sex-related dialogue/humor) with a character named Alotta Fagina (pictured) in it for her 7-year-old grandkid? Maybe there should be some scaremongering about the real enemy: grandmas! Meanwhile, the Brooklyn Library is all, "we have the problem under control and will remove the tape."
Living in the Future
With apartment prices in New York quickly sailing north of $1500/sqft, if you're looking to buy a place, it might be time to start getting creative. For more than a year we've been thinking about the pre-fab housing revolution that's taking place around the United States. No longer are pre-fabs the ugly, cheaply built units you might remember from your youth. These houses are something else entirely: modern, airy, and modular, so they're easy to configure. In New York, of course, the challenge is to find a spot to put your pre-fab house-- short of dropping one in Central Park, there isn't much open land around here. Unless you consider the roof!
BAM Celebrates Johnny Depp
It seems many film critics think Burton’s “darker” Willy Wonka bears an uncanny resemblance to Michael Jackson clad in Austin Powers’ wardrobe. E! reports that “a PG-rated kids' fantasy--linked to a fallen pop star with longish black hair, pale skin, a whisper for a speaking voice, a penchant for military garb and a recent acquittal on child-molestation charges is likely not what the Hollywood studio had in mind when it turned Burton.” Depp insists his Wonka’s look and demeanor was not inspired by Michael Jackson, but by Captain Kangaroo and Mr. Rogers (??) and that “everyone is entitled to think what they want, even while being violently wrong.” While we agree Jacko-Wonka is slightly creepy, we find the connection odd as anyone who even skimmed Amazon’s Charlie and the Chocolate Factory customer feedback would know that Dahl’s Wonka dislikes children and would sooner grope a balding Oompa Loompa before sharing his marshmallow-fluffed bed with little boys.
A Cavalcade of Comedy Personalities This Weekend
Comedy shows in New York this weekend are going to be just like Debra Messing’s hair– all over the place but still really good. Here’s the rundown of what not to miss:
Even Celebrities Have Poopy Toilets
How Stuff Works on how toilets works and there's actually a device out there to stop toilet overflows. And a hilarious take from the Columbia Spectator on Kravitz's current stage as a musician-celebrity.
Republican Convention: Day 3 Notes
For his part, the President watched the festivities from Elmhurst, Queens, where he accepted the endorsement of the city's firefighters' union. Notable was the Mayor's absence, but Mayor Bloomberg begged it off saying he had lots to do. Oh, Mayor B, did something "suddenly come up"?
Your Average $1 Million Apartment
." Of course, the average is skewed, due to the many trophy apartments in the city that might not sell, like Ian Schrager's CPW folly. It feels very Austin Powers, when people coming to NY say they want to spend $1 million (one meel-yon dollars!) on an apartment and real estate agents will just laugh in their faces.
Full Throttle Annoying
All the talk about Charlie's Angels Full Throttle being about female empowerment is a joke, because it's just about a bunch of girls being silly and their T&A. Of course Gothamist knew that, but the evidence is too overwhelming not to comment on. For starters, a painful-to-read interview by Sean Smith of Newsweek, with the Angels, Drew Barrymore, Cameron Diaz, and Lucy Liu. Here's a sample:

