When celebrity accountant Kenneth Starr was arrested yesterday, the feds discovered him hiding under a pile of clothes in a closet. But it didn't take them long to find him because his wife—former stripper and current pole dancer Diane Passage—let them into the apartment and whispered, "He's upstairs," the Daily News reports. Starr kept books for stars like Uma Thurman, Martin Scorsese, Wesley Snipes, Caroline Kennedy, Annie Leibovitz and Sylvester Stallone. But investigators say the high-profile Democratic party donor was actually running a $30 million Ponzi scheme. more ›

This should be fun: NY1 reports that State Comptroller Thomas DiNapoli and City Comptroller John Liu "announced they will audit the MTA to determine if bus and subway service disruptions are always necessary, as well as the financial impact of those disruptions. The audit is expected to take months to complete." For lovers of the "two sets of books" mythology, check this out. more ›

In Albany, someone needs to take remedial accounting: Apparently the state miscalculated how much the MTA would get from a payroll tax associated with the bailout and it turns out the transit agency is getting at least $200 million less than expected. MTA Chief Financial Officer Gary Dellaverson told board members in an e-mail, "This is a shocking development both because of the magnitude of the under-run and the late date of its discovery." It's also shocking because it'll probably mean service cuts! more ›

The tabloids caught up with former three-time All-Star Lenny Dykstra yesterday after he settled a lawsuit from an accounting firm which claimed Dykstra didn't pay almost $140,000 in accounting fees. Dykstra said the firm "folded like Mitch Williams in the ninth" and added, "There was no case. There was nothing"--all while chomping on Twizzlers. When a reporter brought up allegations that Dykstra bounced a $7,000 check for a private plane flight, the Post reports Dykstra, who put some of the $27 million he got from the Phillies into car washes, said, "That's my f---in' ashtray money, bro. I don't even know if I flew on their plane." then proceeded to show the Post reporter the label of his pinstripe suit, "See that purple label, bro? That's seven large." Keep it classy, Nails! more ›