Do you enjoy ingeniously crafted rock tunes, with brilliant lyrics and arrangements for accordion, keyboard, ukulele, guitar, bass and drums? Do you like pirates? How about puppets? Rum based drink specials? Laughing until your sides hurt? If you answered yes to even one of these questions, you’re ready to set forth on the dread ship Jollyship the Whiz-Bang, the rollicking “pirate puppet rock odyssey” that’s currently docked at Ars Nova....

Brooklyn kickball team Los Pirates Mechanicos (pictured) are down one man as of yesterday; Lawrence Jackson (better known as Lance) was arrested for carrying around a rusty pirate sword (also pictured) in Macy's. Unsurprisingly, the NYPD took it for a weapon, not a recreational sports prop. While the "Free Lance!" comments come in on the team's MySpace profile, the NY Post tosses around labels like "bonehead," "rabblerouser" and "kook" amongst their descriptives of the Greenpoint......

We got a tip today saying that The Peking had gone missing from the South Street Seaport. The 1911 four-masted barque is part of the fleet owned by the South Street Seaport Museum...and it's huge, so it's sort of tough to misplace. At first we thought: Pirates? Ghost ship? But then the nice young man at the museum's front desk told us it was a planned removal. The boat was towed out this morning for......

Tigers 8 Yankees 5: Detroit is a great offensive team and the question the Yankees have to answer is, can their pitching stand up to a great offensive team? In the first of eight games against Detroit, the answer was a resounding no. The Tigers knocked around Mike Mussina for seven runs (six earned) in five innings of work. The Yankees had some chances, getting fifteen runners on base, but couldn’t mount a sustained rally......

Mets 10 Pirates 8: What should have been a laugher became a little too close for comfort two different times Wednesday night. The Mets jumped out to a 5-0 lead in the first, thanks to doubles from David Wright and Carlos Delgado and a home run from Moises Alou, but Pittsburgh crept back into the game. The Pirates scored twice in the second and added single runs in the fourth and sixth to make it......

A look at some noteworthy television this week: Secrets of New York: New York's Firsts: Pioneering Moments (Sunday, 8:30 p.m., WNYE 25) Kelly Choi takes a look at some New York firsts. White Light/Black Rain: The Destruction of Hiroshima and Nagasaki (Monday, 7:30 p.m. HBO) To commemorate the 62nd anniversary of the first bombing of civilian targets with nuclear weapons at Hiroshima, HBO airs this look at the two deadly attacks through archival footage and......

Royals 7 Yankees 0: Kei Igawa should buy a plane ticket back to Japan. Today’s ledger of 5.2 innings, seven hits and 2 walks while allowing five runs just reinforced the fact that Igawa is nothing more than a batting practice pitcher. The Yankees could have won seven-straight, but they didn’t, at least we know that Igawa is junk and Phil Hughes will be back in the rotation soon. Pirates 8 Mets 4: Oliver Perez......

Mets 6, Pirates 3: Tom Glavine picked up his 299th career win by taking advantage of a rare night of productivity from Paul Lo Duca. A start after wilting despite having a 6-0 lead before he threw a pitch, Glavine shut down the Pirates at Shea. Lo Duca entered the game with a .312 on-base percentage and a .357 slugging average, and, despite the Mets' laughable efforts to have him elected to the All-Star Game,......

There was a fuss - and VitaminWater truck - at the FDNY's Ladder 20 Engine 13 firehouse on Lafayette Street. With good reason: Mets third baseman David Wright was filming a commercial for vitaminwater. Wright, New York's hottie come lately athlete, plays a vitaminwater delivery man - see how his uniform says "David"? Firefighters were taking photographs with their cellphones and Wright seemed to be having a good time. We just hope he's well-rested......

Mets 2, Reds 1: On a night when the Mets honored one member of the Baseball Hall of Fame, a future member inched closer to the 300 win milestone. It was Ralph Kiner Night at Shea Stadium and the Mets announced that their broadcast booth at Citi Field will bear the broadcaster's name. The TV booth at Shea is already named after Kiner, who played in the Majors for 13 seasons, mostly with the Pittsburgh......

Reds 8, Mets 4: Double, bunt single, walk, grand slam. That's how this game started for John Maine, and the Mets never recovered. The Reds needed four batters to score four runs. The Mets took all nine innings. With the Braves' win over the Pirates, the Mets' National League East lead has dwindled to 1 1/2 games. That said, there's no shame to losing to the Reds with Aaron Harang on the mound. Dumping one......

The 31st Annual Macy's 4th of July Fireworks extravaganza is just around the corner. This is the largest display in America and takes a year to plan. This year's show will stretch wider than usual in a "high definition" format, choreographed to the New York Pops (simulcast on 1010 WINS, TV broadcast on NBC). The Daily News has an interview with Gary Souza, fireworks designer for the event; he says, "We have a new......

Yankees 13 Pirates 6: It’s official, the Yankees are on fire. Sunday they completed their sweep of the Pirates, bludgeoning them behind two home runs from Alex Rodriguez and a 4-4 day from Bobby Abreu. The win was their sixth in a row and leaves them one game below .500 and 9 ½ back in the division. From the outset, the bats were cooking, jumping out to a 3-0 lead in the first, but the......

Yankees 9, PIrates 3: A little more than a month after his dramatic announcement, and despite a short delay, Roger Clemens returned to the Yankees with a win yesterday against the Pittsburgh Pirates. Clemens threw for 6 innings, allowing 5 hits, 3 runs, and struck out 7. It was The Rocket's first win with the team since 2003 and his 349th career victory. The 44 year-old Clemens threw 108 pitches, 69 of them for......

Yankees 5 Pirates 4 (10 innings): Derek Jeter always seems to come through in the clutch and Friday night was no different, even if the way he did so wasn’t that impressive. With the bases loaded and one out, Jeter hit a little dribbler between first and second. Needing to get the out at home or turn a double play, the Pirates’ second baseman tried to barehand the ball and couldn’t make the play. The......

Yankees 5 White Sox 1:If the Yankees are going to get off the deck and get back into playoff contention, they will need a lot more nights like this. Chien-Ming Wang was brilliant, going the distance while allowing only one run and six baserunners. Wang also struck out four as he cruised to an easy win, his fifth of the season. The Yankees scored the bulk of their runs in the fourth. Johnny Damon......

A Bourne, a Cloon and a pirate, oh my...with the Memorial Day holiday this weekend, we're entering the prime summer movie season and it's time to get psyched. Psyched! Here's just some Hollywood flicks we're awaiting between now and Labor Day. With all of these things to see, it's probably time to spring for the econo tub of popcorn and a bucket of soda to get through it all. May The summer gets underway as......

With the news that Roger Clemens is returning to the Yankees, reactions from the local media and Yankee fans are generally positive. Clemens made the announcement during the 7th inning of yesterday's 5-0 win over the Seattle Mariners. After the singing of "Take Me Out to the Ballgame," Bob Sheppard directed the crowd to the owner's box for a special announcement. Only then did the public find out that Clemens would be returning to......

Clearly, Keith Richards telling NME that he snorted his dad's ashes is huge news, or the tabloids just didn't take to the story about an appeals court making an insurer pay for a boy's breast reduction surgery (the teen is "burdened with unusually large breasts for a boy"). Though it has the better headline, the Post disappoints us by not whipping up some Photoshop fun - like Keith snorting something out of a casket-shaped urn.......

Windows of opportunity in baseball often come in small sizes. After coming within a run of the National League pennant last season, the Mets hope their chance hasn't run out yet. Make no mistake, the Mets remain a force to be reckoned with and could end up finishing with a better result than they did last season. But they shouldn't expect the regular-season cakewalk they had last season, and they can't hope to be......

This year, the Today Show's tradition of testing its hosts' fortitude by giving them nutty Halloween costumes did not disappoint. Matt Lauer and Al Roker were Jack Sparrow and Captain Davy Jones from the Pirates of the Caribbean. Yes, that is Al as Captain Davy Jones - he is squidalicious! In years past, Matt and Al have dressed as famous pairs, like Siegfried and Roy, Batman and Robin, and J.Lo and Puffy. We're surprised......

Not everyone was forunate enough to score Game 7 tickets, or didn't want to spend 4x the ticket price for them. Instead we are here with friends live blogging the Cardnials vs Mets! The Cardinals' Jeff Suppan is a better pitcher, but we don't think he'll have the night he had during Game 3. Oliver Perez has a lot to prove, but manager Willie Randolph will pull him and throw everyone in the bullpen......

THEATER: Teflon war criminal and Nobel laureate Henry Kissinger made news again this week with the revelation that Dr. Strangelove has secretly cautioned against any troop withdrawal from Iraq because, just like ‘Nam, such action would “become like salted peanuts to the American public; the more troops come home, the more will be demanded.” Kissinger’s breathtaking contempt for democracy is matched only by his Machiavellian genius; both attributes are skewered to great effect in this......

- Pirates 3, Mets 0: No need to overreact to the Mets' being swept in Pittsburgh by the lowly Pirates, but the series can provide a few laughs. On a serious note, fans should hope Pedro Martinez doesn't have too many more outings to cry over and that Willie Randolph doesn't make Steve Trachsel is Game 4 starter just because the pitcher's piled up wins. John Maine, who lost Sunday, doesn't get the run support......

-Pirates 3 New York 2: The Mets really know how to kill a party. With everyone primed for a division-clinching win on a weekend night, New York has punted twice. Pittsburgh scored with two outs in the ninth to win the game and prevent the Mets from clinching the NL East. While we know they will ultimately win it, it’s too bad they are going to make their fans head to work with hangovers.......

After rain washed out Tuesday's action, plenty of tennis made up for the lost time on Wednesday. Mikhail Youzhny took out Rafael Nadal in four sets, opening the draw for Andy Roddick, who disposed of Lleyton Hewitt. Roddick has enjoyed a resurgence since he hired Jimmy Connors. His backhand has improved -- it couldn't get worse -- and his attitude has changed. Could Roddick beat Roger Federer if they met in the final on Sunday?......

-- A perfect treat for all of you who feel you aren't getting fat fast enough: Max Brenner is offering a chocolate pizza. -- 58% of the respondents in today's Crain's poll said Ray Nagin was right: "Rebuilding the World Trade Center site is taking too long." -- Worst summer vacation ever: first KT McFarland's daughter gets busted for shoplifting, and now she has to hang out with her mom straight through the primaries.......

God, we're so sick of Snakes on a Plane that we want to kill anyone and everyone that makes a "something on a something" joke. But then we realized that there was no way we could ever win this fight, and, hell, if you can't beat them, we might as well join them. And with that, you have the theme of this weeks' Gothamist network post. Austinist makes it easy for us, with Candidate......

Gothamist likes to eat and can understand getting the late night munchies. But when we're on the road for business late on a Sunday night in a nice hotel that has room service and we get a food stipend, we usually order in. Apparently, if you're Duaner Sanchez in Miami, that's not what you do. Some details have been released about the early Monday morning accident the Mets reliever was involved in. Sanchez, his younger......

-Yankees 10 Indians 4: Until he hit the eighth inning, Randy Johnson looked like his former self. Mixing fastballs and sliders with precision, Johnson dominated Cleveland holding them hitless until the fifth and off the scoreboard until the seventh. He left after 7 2/3 innings having allowed three earned runs and striking out five. Jason Giambi got the Yankees going with his 26th home run of the season, a two-run blast, and they took advantage......