New Yorkers Aren't "Friendly" Enough, Say Sensitive Readers Of Irrelevant Magazine

If it's the third week of January, it's time for media outlets to regurgitate Travel & Leisure's annual reader survey of America's "favorite" cities. Bite-size tabloid AM New York was quick to cough up a cover story today about how we're just not that friendly, and the Daily News also reports that "out-of-towners have ranked New York as the No. 1 city — in rudeness." But as we pointed out last time this bullshit survey resurfaced, the word "rude" isn't part of Travel & Leisure's survey, which ranks cities by how friendly its residents are. And just because you're not perceived as "friendly" doesn't mean you're rude! For instance, it might mean you're simply busy and don't have time to cheerfully pour iced tea for every needy hayseed tourist blocking the tourist lane.

"New York ultimately claimed the title of No. 1 rudest city," reports Travel & Leisure, once again misrepresenting their own stupid survey, just like last year and the year before that. According to their readers, New York City residents are the least friendly in America (last year these "readers" said LA locals were the most unfriendly). This time around, LA is the fourth least-friendly city, while Miami ranks second and D.C. third and blah blah blah click on the ads! Far be it from us to question Travel & Leisure's scientific rigor, but again: this meaningless survey is just a cheap way to get people to click through on a slideshow and remember—if only for a brief, exasperating moment—that Travel & Leisure is still a thing that exists. Enter NOW for a chance to win a DREAM VACATION to somewhere FRIENDLY! Like, say, New York City, tourists' favorite city in America.

Asked about the survey's legitimacy, Gothamist 2011 said, "Anybody who's ever visited NYC knows the old stereotype of the boorish, inconsiderate New Yorker is just a canard... Stop and ask a New Yorker for directions and others will immediately gather, competing to guide you. Fall onto the subway tracks and New Yorkers will risk their lives to save you. Hell, even our bank robbers are polite." But don't take our word for it, let's do a reader survey of our own!

Contact the author of this article or email tips@gothamist.com with further questions, comments or tips.

By John Del Signore in News on January 24, 2012 11:52 AM

Comments [rss]

uberzete

Yawn.

zincink

You think New Yorkers aren't friendly try NJ for a sample. Actually I do not run into many true blue New Yorkers anymore. Chances are you are one of these three....a moron, an idiot, an asshole. You must also add your own personalized curse word to the beginning of those three words for it to be complete. I will use this in a phrase "Merge you fucking moron whatthehellisyourproblem!!".

Starry Gordon

Actually, New Yorkers tend to be polite and helpful because so many of them are foreign-born and come from countries where good manners are still valued.

Abbey Ozanich

As many have said, New Yorkers aren't rude or unfriendly. They're just...busy? Aggressive? Honest? I far prefer it to the phony niceties of the midwest, where everyone just pretends to be "nice" to your face and then the moment they feel any degree of anonymity (behind the wheel, on internet message boards) or feel they are in a position of power (dining out, etc.) they become the most obscene jerks I have ever met. They're also incredibly passive aggressive. I would much rather deal with a brusk but generally well meaning New Yorker.

Oh, and whoever said that the non-natives are the rude ones is right: the rudest people I've met in NYC have all been from, you guessed it, the midwest. Native NYers have been nothing but nice in my experience, stopping and chatting me up on the train, asking me about projects I'm working on whenever I'm taking photographs, always willing to help and stand up for me. Wherever I go I always miss that.

robingee

Worst drivers ever. Rude, entitled a-holes. But we all knew that. Stopping for a Stop sign? HONK! Waiting for peds to cross at the WALK sign? HONK! Pulling into a driveway carefully so as not to murder children playing? HONK HONK HONNNNNK!!

Elizabeth Stockwell

pfft, as a Bostonian I laugh at your "bad drivers" and "traffic problems"

JAB84

We are not rude. We are efficient.

Elizabeth Stockwell

A friend of mine who also lived in Chicago (another "rude" town) put it like this "We're not rude, we just have better things to do than to talk to you!"

dd7

New Yorkers are not rude - they just tell it like it is, and that's a good thing. People in other places pretend to be friendly to your face, then stab you in the back.

Jacqueline Allain

I have a whole rant about this. Non- New Yorkers don't understand the difference between rudeness and efficiency.

Josselin Philippe

"I'm walkin' here!"

miss_subways

"Rude" is subjective. To me, being rude is walking four abreast on a sidewalk at a leisurely pace, an action that is not exclusive to tourists. It is also creeping along while peering at a phone or a book (reading while walking: something I am noticing more and more of), oblivious to those behind you, or standing in a pack outside a bar or restaurant, hogging the entire sidewalk.

And to those people, I am probably considered rude because I rush past them, sometimes possibly slightly grazing them, or walk between them. You can't win. We each think the other is rude. It's annoying, but a tiny part of any given day. That's overcrowding for you.

Jacqueline Allain

Well said.

bigtimegeek

I've lived all over the east coast, including Philly, and on the west coast in San Francisco, spent my summers down in South Carolina where I have family and now I have family in Mississippi, and New York is a perfectly friendly place. Even in my early days of living here when I may have had to ask someone a question on the street I never got a rude response. People are way more social with each other here, which is a key consideration. If I had to boil it down I'd say that New Yorkers have a bit of a shell that's harder to crack, they're not always outgoingly friendly (at least at first), but they're great people. I'd rather be around honest, real people any day, even if they're not glowing with smiles and meaningless chit chat all the time, than the faked, two-faced niceness that you get down south, and to a large extent in SF.

diablofreak

fuck tourists. fuck you and you can suck on my big red c---

seriously how about stop gawking at the world trade center site and blocking the narrow roads when im trying to get to my next meeting. its not rude, its called making a living. fuckers.

robingee

Why is your c-ck red?

Matthew Lane

Because he got kicked in it for being a rude new yorker... obviously ;)

BXMets

I move to Stamford CT from the Bronx and Stamford is only 20 mins from the Bronx but can feel like a world away in the Bronx (Morris Park area) your neighbors talk to you and are helpful in CT I still don't know more then 3 of my neighbors and I been living in CT since 06 in a condo and folks in CT are lot more angry

Mr. Know-It-All

I gotcha rude, right here!

Peanut_Butter

I question the presumption that everyone on the sidewalk should be moving, in any particular direction at all. I just came back from a place where there were a lot of people in very limited space, and everyone was moving in all different directions, and no one lost a beat. If you need to get somewhere, just go around, instead of getting bent out of shape.

Mordicai

You know what is rude? Being in the South & having people think it is okay for them to pry into your business. No, stranger, I'm not going to engage in some heart to heart with you, leave me alone, I am in the middle of reading my book.

Roark

Void bless Enrico "Ratso" Rizzo

WZA

We're not rude, just direct.

Philly folks are rude.
Phuckers.

sauerkrautcity

They're not just rude, they're genuine pieces of shit

Elizabeth Stockwell

I moved here from Boston, color me unimpressed with the "rudeness" of New Yorkers.

Kate Noyes

Seconded. I grew up in Boston and moved here about 6 months ago. I was actually astounded by how much friendlier people were here. New Yorkers get an unfair rap.
Bostonians are great, but their rudeness is aggressive and often unprovoked.

DrSysz

All Boston Massholes except Bloomie get honorary New Yorker status AFAIC......

X

Agreed. On arriving here from Boston, I felt like I'd moved to Mayberry with skyscrapers.

PlumNYC

I'm born and raised here and normally I wouldn't say New Yorkers are rude.

But since I've been traveling, I have noticed how rude men are here.

Shouldering you as they pass you in the street, the nasty cat calls, blocking your path or following you to get your attention. The men who cut a woman off to get to a seat on the train, or don't offer their seat when a pregnant woman is around or physically ill on the train. The sexual harassment is my main gripe, but really, men here just aren't nice.

I never really have issues with women in this city, but the guys are killing me with the rudeness. And I mean of all backgrounds.

Timon_8

All the estrogen must be clouding your perception. Women are infinitely ruder in this town than men, especially in the subway. I can't count the number of times I've been prevented from exiting subway cars by women crowding to get in before anyone has a chance to get off. And if a woman sits down next to me on the subway, I can count on being elbowed at least six times while she rummages around for something in her purse, with never an "excuse me" passing her lips. A couple of days ago, some woman stepped on my foot in her rush to grab a seat on the subway, and copped attitude when I objected. Men almost never do this, at least not to me. I don't believe I have ever been cut off for a seat in the subway by a man--only by women. And this leaves unaddressed the whole issue of how so many women utterly refuse to look where their going while walking down the street. If you're "shouldered" as you pass on the street, I'm willing to bet it's because you weren't looking.

This reads like some screed where I'm just making shit up, but it is, unfortunately, my experience day in and day out in NYC.

PlumNYC

As got your estrogen comment, classic ignorant cop out. Testosterone isn't exactly the hormone of good judgment.

Timon_8

As you yourself said, "People who don't understand jokes should be taken outside and shot."

What followed it, however, was NOT a joke, just to be clear.

robingee

You don't have to explain and explain to these dicks why you feel the way you do.

PlumNYC

I wasn't going to anymore. Those are the kind of men that probably do the things i'm talking about.

PlumNYC

Actually, I am always looking where I'm going, I move to try to avoid and still get shouldered cause they don't bother to make a little way. And you can say women are as rude as men are on the trains, but we have nothing on men when it comes to harassment.

Timon_8

Well, you're a credit to your sex, then. One of the very few.

But it appears that men can do no right when it comes to you, anyway. First you say of the men in NYC, "50% of those single men are gay. 25% are lazy bums, woman haters or
mentally ill or don't really have good jobs. 15% have stds, 20% overall
have kids, that leaves about 5% of good options", and now they're all harassing you.

You're right--you certainly can't win with internet commenters.

marekgerbe

"The men who cut a woman off to get to a seat on the train"
You can't expect equality and then expect men to give special treatment to women by offering seats to them (who AREN'T pregnant or elderly). Women cut in front of me to get a seat too... and I at least have joint problems which make it hard for me to stand up for prolong periods of time.

I also think you're generalizing. Sure, there are some assholes sexually harass women but the vast majority of men in NY aren't worse than those in any other city.

PlumNYC

You're not a woman, so you're not experiencing what NYC women experience day in and day out. Trust me, men here are pretty awful. I've never been harassed as much anywhere else I've been. When you have men touching you, grabbing your hand, flashing you and being overly aggressive with their come ons at least once a week, then you can talk. Otherwise, you know nothing about it.

Secondly, I didn't say anything about men having to give up their seat for women in general. I said men constantly cut women off for seats, even elderly and pregnant women. I see it all the time.

Matthew Lane

"You're not a woman"

Ar yes, the catch cry of the lazy conversationalist. Just for the record "You're not a woman" is not a valid argument to anything. You're not a woman is actually a logical fallacy known as special pleading. Please don't do that it makes you sound self entitled.

marekgerbe

You wrote this:

"Men here just aren't nice."

and then this:

"When you have men touching you, grabbing your hand, flashing you and being overly aggressive with their come ons at least once a week, then you can talk. Otherwise, you know nothing about it."

I'm not saying it doesn't happen nor is it excusable, but to generalize men like this is laughable.

But yeah, keep pushing those stereotypes.

robingee

Oh for fuk's sake, can she have a goddamned opinion based on what she lives EVERY DAY without someone bleating "You said this you siad that you are wrong here are excuses why you are wrong blah blah blurg!"

naala

Been here over two years coming from another country and so far the only people who've ever been rude around me are American tourists and out-of-towners...

splicernyc

The article is wrong, it's visitors who are rude. Just the other day I saw this family on the subway with a ridiculously cute daughter who looked about [enter age of consent in NY here]. So I smile and try to strike up a "enjoying your trip to NYC" conversation with her. The mother shoots me a nasty look which tells me everything I need to know about people from Indiana. OK, so I'm 30 years older than the girl and a total stranger but in this day and age aren't we past these prejudices?

NYers are very friendly.

Matthew Lane

"The article is wrong, it's visitors who are rude"

Actually its article can't be wrong since it was a survey of what travellers thought. The travellers can be wrong, but the article can't be wrong.

splicernyc

Articles are people, my friend.

Matthew Lane

I'll believe it when Texas executes one for it crimes against humanity.

Stephen Tetreault

First mistake: Don't talk to anyone on the subway.

tijuanatornado

Who gives a rat's ass about this article?

Peter Welch

New Yorkers aren't rude, they're just busy and don't want to listen to everybody's useless small talk or watch their this-usually-gets-me-something smiles.

GentleGiant

Screw you, too.

Stephen Tetreault

Bawww

Stephen Tetreault

I'm probably slightly rude when I have to be around certain areas in midtown
and have to deal with people walking around and stopping constantly
like they're on some suburban sidewalk. Almost everyone I have to deal
with in Brooklyn is incredibly friendly though. People have shit to deal
with and dont have time to bend over backwards for tourists and
miscellaneous gawkers on the streets.

CurmudgeonNYC

Because everyone now in Brooklyn (at least the parts that you hear on the news) are transplant douchebags who want to make every little thing artisan and personal and friendly. Fuck em.

Stephen Tetreault

You're right. Approx. 2.2 million people in Brooklyn and you've somehow hit the nail on the head...

Guest

i live in brooklyn and i dislike all the twee. does that still make me a douchebag? :(

knayte

I think if someone made a word cloud of Gothamist comments, the words "transplant douchebags" would be fuckin' huge.

sauerkrautcity

Not all of Brooklyn is Williamsburg

robingee

Seriously! If Brooklyn is the size of your fist, the "artsy hipster" part is your pinky nail. The rest of the borough could give a shit about being cool.

TheRealCannibal

Eat a dick, Travel & Leisure

H.e. Pennypacker

places like nyc and paris get a reputation for being rude from clueless fucks who don't know how to respect other people and mind their own business.

BoogieDown

Depends on what you consider rude behavior. I consider spitting, littering, pissing on toilet seats, and speaking loudly to be rude behavior, and far too many New Yorkers are guilty of these things. I don't necessarily find New Yorkers to be unfriendly though.

galaxytime

i consider snapping gum and jostling me so i can't get off the train not entirely polite, but apparently hundreds here do. :(

sketto

A lot of people get their ideas about New Yorkers from Law and Order and CSI, both of which feature lots of actors playing "real New Yorkers".

robingee

People come here thinking 45% of New Yorkers are horribly murdered corpses.

sketto

and that Tompkins Square Park and Washington Square Park have murdered hookers half-buried underneath every bush.

Marc Hug

the rudest city i have ever been to is reykjavik. funny thing is, they try so hard to be 'new york' cool but fail miserably because i find new york a damn friendly place.

tom9d

Really? I found the people in Reykjavik super friendly and polite. People there went out of their way to be helpful and accommodating, and strangers would even approach us just to talk.

Dennis

some dude in Reykjavik told me to go fuck myself... it was pretty bad.

Matthew Lane

Maybe he mistook you for a sexual contortionist... Were you wearing spandex at the time?

hamburgerhelpless

anyone that thinks we're rude can go fuck themselves.

GentleGiant

Screw you.

Stephen Tetreault

Aww it's okay lil guy.

Stephen Tetreault

I both lawled and shook my head in agreement.

mayorguilliani

I firmly believe it's the tourists who are rude. They get in the way, rarely ask for directions nicely, Talk loudly on the subway, block sidewalks, block subway entrances, slow everything down... I could go on and on, and to be clear, I'm talking about the American tourists.

whiteiris

Um, not American tourists, European and especially Russian tourists are the rudest.
Sullenberger vs Schettino American Hero versus Italian Coward. Nothing more to say.

Lloyd Bergenson

Ugh! Tourists!

Jim Idol

Ratzo Rizzo!!

GenDeLaRey

New Yorkers catch a bad rap. No one has to deal with the sheer number of tourists, who are generally idiots, that NYC does. I'm from Chicago, we get a better reputation because we keep tourists in pen-like enclosures like Millennium Park, Mag Mile, Navy Pier, away from the kind of people who will injure them for moving slowly. Maybe New York should explore enclosing Times Square so the humans don't mix with the out of town rabble. Just an idea.

Matthew Lane

I love the irony of this statement: New Yorkers catch a bad rap so lets put non new yorkers in pens when they visit so that REAL new yorkers don't have to talk to them. That would be the epitome of rude. :)

Gothamist_Cynic

Hmm isn't that what Times Square is for?

GenDeLaRey

It's too central and too easy to escape. If Times Square was recreated on Staten Island, that'd be perfect. We put a bunch of over priced chain restaurants (Fridays, Olive Garden etc) on a disused pier and they generally stay there because its surrounded on three sides by water. They can stay there, pay sales tax on a Blues Brothers t-shirt and some deep dish, look at the skyline, park for hilarious amounts of money (and more sales tax), there's a trolly that keeps them contained if they choose to venture out, and then they go back from whence they came. Probably Omaha.

Samantha Nicholson

NYC needs more Olive Gardens.

jamieob256

Fabulous idea!

BrassMonkeyBallz

I love Chicago!

GenDeLaRey

Stay in the tourist zone. I might steal your funnel cake.

BrassMonkeyBallz

ha! Don't worry about me, I'm a good visitor. I hate being near any tourists when I visit another city.

GenDeLaRey

In that case, Pilsen and Uptown come highly recommended. Chicago's real friendly once you get out the Loop.

galaxytime

ugh, i miss chicago. people just smiled at me for no reason. here people show me their penis.

Matthew Lane

Dude, consider your self lucky... You have no idea how far i have to go to have a random person whip it out in public.

birdtird

Are they at least smiling when they show you their penis?

evbo

Does the penis ever smile?

GenDeLaRey

Never mind. Don't go to Uptown. Lots of penis showing.

galaxytime

pilsen food! just incredible.

Jen Chung

Is it rude that when I'm on the sidewalk, I want to, you know, WALK and not stand around? And is it rude that when someone asks me, "Where's Ground Zero," I point and say, "Where all the construction is."?

CurmudgeonNYC

No. People are fucking imbeciles and not aware of their surroundings in the least bit. When I travel I rely on a map, my brain, and a willingness to get lost and explore.

Detex

people are too dumb to read maps now that everything is GPS and they fear getting lost.

CurmudgeonNYC

Another problem is that many US Americans dont have access to maps...like such as.

LEScrabby

Exactly. Stuff like this pisses me off because I can't count the number of times I have overheard idiotic tourists standing around, talking amongst themselves, debating the dumbest question imaginable. Like, standing under a sign that says "downtown _ train" and wondering whether it will go uptown. It doesn't seem to occur to them to just ask someone, and the few times I have interjected and tried to steer them straight, they look totally flabbergasted that someone would speak to them. And probably think it's "rude." It's like they come here and think they are on another planet where none of the signs can possibly be correct. They also seem to have inordinate confidence that they can go out into one of the biggest cities in the world and find their way around without having consulted a map first.

Kevin Bracken

Yes.

Haha. New York... at least it's cheap? Oh.

Kevin Bracken

People in New York are rude. When I finally moved out of New York for the first time in my life, I became so much more trusting and kind. Then when I moved back 5 years later, I became a "I will bump into you on the train and not say sorry" person again within 6 months.