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Meat From A Petri Dish: It's Really Happening, Says Science

More terrifying news today comes courtesy of Science, which is apparently closing in on perfecting lab-grown, in-vitro meat. Don't call it "imitation" meat—this stuff is legitimately animal flesh, but it was never part of a living animal. Have we learned nothing from the Japanese poop burger?

Scientists have already proven that meat can be grown in a test tube (here's an in-depth article from NPR about it), but they're currently trying to figure out if such a thing is commercially feasible. PETA is offering up a cool million to anyone who can make lab chicken with the same taste and texture as the real deal, and and sell at least 2,000 pounds of it in 10 states by early 2016. Over 30 labs around the world are already working on the tube-grown stuff, though we're still holding out for vegetarian-friendly Soylent Green. [via Fork in the Road]

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  • Roger_the_Shrubber

    Planned Parenthood is also going to start serving their fried fetus cakes soon.

  • BeaElliott

    This is wonderful news - Finally, for those unable/unwilling to forgo the flesh, blood and bone from slaughtered creatures... A healthy, sustainable and compassionate alternative! For the 58 billion land animals butchered every year --- This can't happen soon enough.

  • PicoPhreako69

    Feh.  Now if they can make Pete from a Meatri dish,.... gimme a call.
    Otherwise, fuggheddabouddit.

  • HymietownHero

    Let me know when they can get a good Kobe-style marbling on the synth-steaks.

  • smalll

    Yep, this is a good thing. I'm a meat eater, and look askance at vegans, but if they can grow our meat, I'm all for it.  I'm not going to stop eating meat because an animal gets killed, but if we can produce meat without killing animals, I'll be happy. 

    But of course the snooty foodies won't like it.  For them, efficiently lab-grown meat will never have the cachet of organically raised free-range Colin the Local Chicken. 

  • ThereAreNoActorsInThisFilm

    what an inappropriate picture choice gothamist

  • randomtransplant

    Lab grown meat would probably be much cleaner, too. 

    But what effect does it have on the amount of land required to produce the meat? Will we be able to preserve more rain forrests? Am I asking for too much?   

  • Life becomes more like an episode of Better Off Ted every day. Except for the funny parts.

    Ten to one it won't taste as good as the real thing.

  • like what's been done to tomatoes...  they sure don't taste like i recall growing up and i purchase from local farmers market.  i pretty much use tomatoes as decoration or for soups anymore since there's so little taste to them.

    and re this petri-meat -- considering people are gobbling down billions of those hamburgers made from pink goo, can this be any worse?  regardless, i ain't eating either product

  • Or California strawberries. They literally taste like nothing.

  • dd7

    Uh ... why is this "terrifying"?  On the contrary, this is great news.  Now, meat-eaters can eat meat that does not involve torturing and then slaughtering terrified, suffering animals.  Growing the meat in petri dishes is a fabulous idea for those who must eat meat. 

  • I was about to ask the same thing. I'm unclear as to why I'm supposed to be upset by this.

  • FU Boy

    Nope.  I'm not eating any meat less unless was once a living creature. 

  • Like you could even taste the difference in your big mac. Which is the point . If you don't have the balls to kill and harvest your own meat (and realizing the suffering involved) you don't deserve animal meat. This will be a huge breakthrough and not only reduce animal torture but help out the environment immensely.

  • ennuipoet

    I would but my landlord really got pissed the last time I slaughtered a bull in the apartment.  Not mention the cops showing up when the blood started leaking into the hall like that...

  • randomtransplant

    Does the inverse hold? If you don't have the balls to grow and harvest your own wheat (which is more difficult, after all), you don't deserve your own bread?

    That logic sucks on a planet with seven billion people. 

  • FU Boy

    I love the incorrect assumptions you make.  Like I eat big macs and I'm basing that as my metric for 'good meat'.  Or that I haven't killed a critter with my own hands for food.  

    Predators high on the food chain eat those below them.  A rule of nature.  You want to pretend you're outside of that chain and therefor superior, go right ahead - you're deluding yourself.

  • oblivitory

    In general my assumption is that people aren't predators.  But if you are taking down wild deer in the woods with your own hands on a weekly basis, I might be a bit impressed.  And also freaked out.  Or maybe you just munch on flies you catch Mr. Miyagi style.  

  • dd7

    Really?  So you will only eat the meat of suffering, tortured animals rather than meat that involved no suffering?

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