Times Square Pedestrian Plaza Drives NY Post Columnist Mad
URBAN UTOPIA! (Courtesy EDC)
[UPDATE BELOW] Cantankerous NY Post columnist Steve "He Who Yells At Cloud" Cuozzo is OBSESSED with the Times Square pedestrian plaza, which he says "gutted" Times Square's "unique energy," and turned it into "a campground for mostly low-spending tourists." Since the plaza debuted in 2009, "Yells At Cloud" has ranted about it with a virulent single-mindedness that makes Ahab look like Silent Bob. It is Cuozzo's white whale: He piles on the plaza's capacious hump "the sum of all the general rage and hate felt by his whole race from Adam down; and then, as if his chest had been a mortar, he burst his hot heart’s shell upon it." And you didn't think we'd close out 2011 without one more harpoon for the road?
This one is a bit of a stretch, but Cuozzo's contempt has made his mind limber! He finds his angle in the last two pages of a year-end report from the New York Economic Development Corporation [EDC], which provides a rosy overview of various Bloomberg initiatives. At the end, dynamic photos (above) depict Times Square surging with motor vehicle traffic, back before the pedestrian plazas were created. Obviously, this means the EDC—and probably even City Hall—are secretly ASHAMED of the changes, Cuozzo contends. Now, maybe some sheeple think this stock photography doesn't signify anything, but they probably never got swallowed up by a pedestrian plaza and lost a leg. Let Cuozzo read the tea leaves:
[The report] is full of photos of new developments and renderings of those in the planning stage. Yet, the Times Square photo, the largest in the 60-page brochure, is three years old. How ridiculous is this, days before the world’s eyes will be focused on the New Year’s Eve ball drop at 1 Times Square? Why would EDC sneak an embarrassingly out of date photo into a promotional brochure highlighting the future?
Was there no room in EDC’s $828,598,925 annual operating revenue to hire a photographer to take fresh shots? We’ll hazard a guess. Three years ago, Times Square still possessed the unique, visible dynamism that was annihilated by the installation of tacky plazas in 2009... And City Hall itself just might have a qualm. The EDC’s choice of an old Times Square photo suggests an awareness that something’s been lost — a brand of urban energy that throngs of bench-hogging tourists can’t put back.
So no, there isn't actually any real news here, and you get the sense that the "something" that's "been lost" might just be Cuozzo's mind. It probably doesn't help that the Post headquarters is a block away, forcing him into regular contact with a place "New Yorkers once regarded with a mixture of love and hate," which is now, in his words, "one that natives avoid, except those obliged to work there." Speaking for ourselves, we avoided Times Square as much before the pedestrian plaza as we do now.
A spokesperson for the EDC declined to comment, probably because there's just no reasoning with Ahab once he gets an idea in his head. But had the EDC paid for a photographer to shoot the new Times Square plaza, instead of using pre-existing stock photography, Cuozzo probably would have been just as outraged over a waste of taxpayer dollars on flashy plaza propaganda! We reached out to Bloomberg's press office for comment on Cuozzo's speculation that the photos "suggest" City Hall has "a qualm" with the plazas, and we'll update when we hear back.
In the meantime, we suggest you stare deep into these photos of the pedestrian plazas... If you cross your eyes just right they become three dimensional, and you can clearly see that gaping maw opening up in the earth to devour NYC's once-vibrant soul, right there by the intersection of Broadway and 46th.
Update: An EDC spokesperson sent us this statement in response to Cuozzo's feeling that "something's been lost": “Times Square has never been more popular throughout its long history among tourists and employers alike. Despite global economic trends, vacancy rates remain low and average rents are steadily increasing, solidifying its place as one of the most desirable destinations for businesses and retailers in the entire world.”
I hate Times Square now just as much as I did 4 years ago. The only upside is that there are fewer cars trying to kill me as I jaywalk across Broadway.
Times Sq area is jammed with pedestrians day & night... definitely shopping, eating, spending... try getting into Hard Rock or even walking past on the sidewalk...
ANGRYGOD11
Cuozzo may have a point about the Times Square Pedestrian Plaza may be pulling in tourists with low budgets, but he can't expect everyone to pay full price to every show, stay in the most exclusive hotels and dine only in the most expensive restaurants with the entire family. Real New Yorkers tend to avoid this area like the plague.
moronthatlater
Robert Moses took this city like a jailhouse bitch a half century ago and some keep waiting on the bottom bunk for him to come back. It's over. You don't have to like what Times Square has become, but save us all the crap about 'unique energy' you fucking hippie.
sauerkrautcity
wait this thread needs more of the "I'm a New Yorker and I don't go anywhere fucking near Times Square!" bullshit.
as opposed to the absolutely useless, "I don't like the quality of comments on this blog post" bullshit
that's how we feel... so fuck off. It's an nyc blog.
sauerkrautcity
awwww is that how you feel? i'm so sorry for youuuuuu
snarfy
As a visual sight - the crowds, the lights, the buildings - Times Square is fantastic. The energy and life on some nights is electric. If you have guests in town, you bring them to Times Square in the evening/night and the city will live up to their expectations of sensory overload. It is amazing and closing down the roads, putting in the plazas, was a brilliant move. Serious props to the people who got that done.
The before picture Cuozzo highlights has Times Square looking much more generic. Now if you're there, it feels like you are at the center of the universe. Native New Yorkers get inured to that, we don't even notice or feel the buzz anymore - too busy silently cursing at the hordes in our way and ourselves for deciding to walk through Times Square to get to where we're going. But if you're new in town - or just take a second to stop and look around, standing in the middle of Times Square is pretty awesome.
Times Square isn't just for New Yorkers - which, at its core, is Cuozzo's complaint. It's really for everybody. And if that was the plan, then it has wildly succeeded.
pendejito
If to you the center of the universe is a bunch of idiot tourists aimlessly looking around at corporate billboards, might I suggest you do some traveling abroad.
Your comment was just stupid. There is nothing "center of the universe" about Times Square. Just a bunch of billboards and flashy lights selling things.
If Times Square is your center of the universe, then Magic Kingdom at Disney World must be your God.
Seriously. Times Square is full of advertisements. Big, bright advertisements. And full of shitty chain restaurants. These people that are "in awe" standing around Times Square are the same ones that go to Vegas and think it's as good as being in Italy.
luke_1
Welcome to Western civilization dudes. You have your heads up your asses all your life? Our society is nothing but corporate billboards. Christ I mean we gave them the same rights as people. We are capitalism and the symbolic center is Times Square.
That doesn't mean you have to like it and I don't. But it is the center of the universe.
Use an RSS reader to stay up to date with the latest news and posts from Gothamist.
Want Gothamist's suggestions on what shows to check out, where to eat, what to buy, where to go for a quick trip? We'll be bringing you some exclusive tips and ideas via email every day! And don't worry—you'll still get a list of our top stories.
Sign up for Gothamist Daily, which will deliver useful tips—plus Gothamist's most popular stories—to your inbox at 11 a.m. This way, you'll be able to plan your week or month as well as catch up on Gothamist if you've stepped away.
$250 VIP GoogaMooga Tickets: You Would've Gotten More Full Eating The Money
Your Summer 2012 Top 10 Blockbuster Movie Guide!
Photos: Experience "NASA's" Amazing Mission To Mars Inside The Park Ave Armory
7 Best Rooftop Bars In NYC, For Your High-Altitude Drinking Pleasure
White Fence's Tim Presley Talks Recording With Ty Segall, Brooklyn's Blandness, & Peeing With His Cat
24 Magnificent Photos Of Manhattan Peacocks To Take The Edge Off Today
Mike Birbiglia Ate In An Airplane Bathroom, And Other Stories From The Moth Ball
John Hodgman Talks Nick Nolte, His Deranged Mustache, & How Money Buys Happiness
Videos: Mourning And Celebrating Beastie Boys' Adam Yauch
Photos: Police And Protesters Clash By Wall Street After Euphoric May Day March
