The 84-Year-Old Pope Is Really Old, Tired, Slow

Pope Benedict last week (AP)

84-year-old Maybelline eyeshadow spokesperson and current head of the Catholic Church Pope Benedict XVI is closing in on his 85th birthday, and Pope-watchers say that he is growing increasingly frail and weak. He's reduced his schedule of public speeches, has stopped meeting visiting bishops individually, and has taken to using a moving platform to make the 100 meter journey to the altar in St. Peter's Cathedral.

"I was struck by what appeared to me as the decline in Benedict's strength and health over the last half year," Rabbi David Rosen told the AP. Rabbi Rosen, head of interfaith relations at the National Jewish Committee, sat near the Pope at a recent event in Assisi. "He looks thinner and weaker, which made the effort he put into the Assisi shindig with the extraordinary degree of personal attention to the attendees…all the more remarkable." Most papal doctors agree that 84-year-olds should only be attending receptions and the occasional box social. Soirees and shindigs, especially shindigs, are exhausting.

Benedict was the oldest Pope to be elected in around 300 years, and it's normal for an 84-year-old man to be winding down. And the Pope himself opened the door to his possible retirement, noting in an interview last year, "If a pope clearly realizes that he is no longer physically, psychologically and spiritually capable of handling the duties of his office, then he has a right, and under some circumstances, also an obligation to resign." Benedict would be the first Pope to do so since 1415 during the Great Western Schism, partly because the church's catechism may be confused with two popes living simultaneously, and party because the dental plan is so good.

Asked to comment on the Pope's medical condition, Vatican spokesman the Rev. Federico Lombari demurred. "I'm not a doctor. I don't give medical bulletins," he said. "In this phase. At this moment." Well can he at least use his iPad?

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By Christopher Robbins in News on December 18, 2011 5:45 PM

Comments [rss]

TrollyMcTrollington

WTF, I thought Darth Vader tossed him down the reactor shaft.

ninety9perscent

all you haters live and respect the churches teachings otherwise youd be animals and caged!!!

sketto

That's so true. I wouldn't know that stealing, murder and lying were bad unless some dude in a white dress told me.

ninety9perscent

where did you learn murder stealing and lying were bad?

sketto

I learned my ethics from my parents and that code was reinforced by the society I lived in and it is continually reinforced through my own experience and decisions.

I did NOT learn morality from the rapists and rape-enablers in the Catholic Church who have lost for all time the ability to tell others what is more. They have shown they don't know.

ninety9perscent

some priest are hipocrites but the stance is for human dignity. ghetto do you understand yet? the aztecs and other societies were cannibals.

sketto

Aztecs are irrelevant to the conversation we're having since I was discussing the Catholic Church which has helped enable rapists for generations.

And since you admit some priests are hypocrites, then you yourself are giving further evidence as to why the church has lost forever its claim on moral authority. It's no better than the rest of society and so I will treat it like the rest of society - it gets the respect it deserves and no more. Since it rapes children, then it deserves none of my attention on the subjects of theft, murder and deceit.

ninety9perscent

every religoin claims moral authority

sketto

True, but we're discussing this religion - you know, the Catholic Church. the religion that rapes children and thinks it's ok. This religion has proved its claim to moral authority is worthless since it cannot even protect the children in its own charge.

ninety9perscent

i am catholic and i am sure the church doesnt suppot anyone raping anyone else

sketto

I was raised Catholic and I am sure that the church has not taken full responsibility for its crimes. When you and I were raised, we were taught that you are always responsible for your own actions, even if you are forgiven by god. You still must take the punishment.

Well, the church has dodged responsibility and not one bishop has been held accountable for moving pedophile priests from parish to parish for decades. That church has not taken responsibility. The church has no right to tell others what is moral when it cannot take honest responsibility for its own crimes.

ninety9perscent

what ru in college grow up, the priest is responsible not the church, and its a business, the church gave lots of money and apologies. the message is good people r bad-priest too-go live a good catholic life and be happy.

sketto

The priests are the church.

I recommend you grow up and stop relying on the advice of immoral people. You're better than that. We're all better than that. The life I live is moral. The life the priests and the bishops lead is not.

Stop listening to the pope and start thinking for yourself. Use the brain god gave you.

ninety9perscent

your writing implies some anger you have, i am sorry for your pain. forgiviness heals....

Roger_the_Shrubber

"84-year-old Mabelline eyeshadow spokesperson and current head of the Catholic Church..."

The writer is a dickhead.

robingee

The Pope is a dickhead. So who cares?

robingee

boo hoo

Thomas C.

Oh, they'll find someone new to lead their child abuse cult. After all, they've got a shit load of money. Too bad there aren't very many former Nazis around these days. That must have been good training for the Pope gig.