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Lesbian Bride Scolded, Rejected By NJ Bridal Shop

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Image courtesy of MNStudio / Shutterstock
Most people we've come across seem to have come to terms with, if not fully support and embrace, the passing of gay marriage in NYC, besides some Florida teachers, evangelical preachers, and crazy-eyed presidential candidates. Oh, and certain NJ bridal shop owners: a lesbian bride-to-be was scolded, and then turned away, by the manager of Here Comes the Bride in Somers Point, N.J.—"She said she wouldn't work with me because I'm gay. She also said that I came from a nice Jewish family, and that it was a shame I was gay. She said, 'There's right, and there's wrong. And this is wrong.' "

Alix Genter told the Philadelphia Daily News about her unfriendly reception at the bridal store. Genter had gone with her mother, father, aunt, a cousin and two friends of the family to try on dresses there for her upcoming marriage to her longtime partner. However, after the salon owner Donna Saber found out she was gay— because she'd crossed out the word "groom" and written "partner" instead on the paperwork—Saber refused to sell her the dress she picked out. She also left a voicemail saying that what Genter was planning was "illegal" and that "we do not participate in any illegal actions."

"I was devastated. I was crying. I called her a bigot; I told her, 'I am a happy person and you are a miserable person.' Then she hung up on me," Genter said. As Daily Kos points out, in NJ it is unlawful for a person to refuse to buy from, sell to, contract or otherwise do business with an individual because of the individual's affectional or sexual orientation.

For her part, Here Comes the Bride owner Saber did not deny any of what Genter said happened. Saber confirmed her version of events and accused her of "stirring up drama," arguing that writing the word "partner" was basically a provocation, evidence of a need "to show that she's different...They get that way." Saber also railed about women who would "experiment" with female relationships because "men can be difficult," and added that she "sensed" Gerber's father's disappointment in her decision to marry a woman. "It's a lot of drama," she concluded.

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Comments [rss]

  • In many societies, norms about clothing reflect standards of modesty, religion, gender, and social status. Clothing may also function as a form of adornment and an expression of personal taste or style.

  • Ardith Ohka

    I wonder if she sells to pregnant brides, or brides who are living with their grooms before marriage, or even people who had been married before, because if she's disagreeing for what she thinks are Christian reasons, those are all mentioned in the book too as no-no's.

  • xXxMExXx

    You would think the bridal shop would have thought this through before this happened, and instituted a policy of not explaining why they can’t (i.e. won’t) cater to every customer. Dumb.

  • People can _believe_ what they wish. N.J. Law Against Discrimination includes discrimination by a business against an individual on the basis of sexual orientation. The Division on Civil Rights may impose penalties
    of up to $10,000 for first violations. http://www.nj.gov/lps/dcr/law....
    Alix Genter Highland Park, NJ--call a lawyer!

    Is Marcia Portnoy active in the shop or is she retired?
    Former? Owner Marcia Portnoy (age 73) -- Egg Harbor Township, NJ.
    One Employee/owner? -- Donna Saber Margate, NJ.
    Years in business -- 23
    272 New Rd
    Somers Point, NJ 08244
    Phone: 609-926-0699
    Open Mon-Tue 10am-8pm; Wed-Fri 10am-5pm; Sat 10:30am-4pm
     

  • xXxMExXx

    Thanks for the info Mary. I was thinking about calling the bridal shop and voicing support, but I am not sure I would have done the leg work without your help.

  • JackBrat72

    Actually- I myself am 'homophobic'! 
    I am afraid that one day. . . I will wake up and realize that I'm a homosexual!
     
    And that wouldn't be so bad; after all, they know all about stuff like: which wine goes with which meal;  which colors go with which other colors;  they dress nicely and like to go to art galleries and art museums like MOMA- (which I, for the longest time- thought was a museum dedicated to 'Motherhood'!!); and also- they can certainly throw a room together in an afternoon! 

    So I thought it wouldn't be all that bad being gay. . . it was only the kissing and sex part that I found off-putting! And hence- I am now: a 100% bonafide homophobe!  Oh well- such is life!

  • mileena

    Too bad all of the critical Yelp comments about this bridal shop are going to be pulled by Yelp:

    http://news.cnet.com/8301-1785...

  • EricKosten

    WAIT. A patently idiotic old bag lives in NEW JERSEY? And owns a store called "Here Comes the Bride"?!? 

    Shocking. 

  • It's near a Kmart… what can one expect?

  • whiteiris

    Wah, she doesn't like me so let's sue. Too bad. It's a private business.

  • fred lucci

    It's a private business contracting with the public and using the publicly sustained infrastructure to make money that Alix Genter pays tax to support.  She has the right to not be discriminated against and I'm sure when she owns "Here Comes the Bride" shop she'll hire a manager that is a bit more sensitive and intelligent. 

  • MsCris

    So, Donna Saber (owner) railed on at Alix Genter (customer) about how she was "wrong" for being a lesbian and how selling her a dress violated her "beliefs". So, I wonder...where did she learn being mean and judging your clientele gets you into Heaven?

    And, my goodness, isn't the fashion world full of many talented gay designers? I have no doubt her business already relied on gay people in some way...by selling the very dresses and outfits gays designed!

  • Their Facebook page. Have at it! https://www.facebook.com/pages...

  • Funny enough, their facebook page was created by the lesbian granddaughter of the original owner, who is understandably not very happy about this whole mess. (If you look at their wall.)

  • Guest

    As I said earlier regarding that asshat Florida teacher, you have no idea how deep I would dig into my savings to pay to be able to fuck this douche in the ass, sans lube.  The biggest homophobes are often homos.  Even this old fucking cunt.  I'd be doing a great service by helping her see the light.  Yup, I'm one annoyed homo.  Oh, and please, please, please, sue the mother fucking shit out of and her shop. 

  • piejon

    Gay People need civil rights in this country.  If this had happened to a Jewish, black, or Hispanic family, everyone would be up in arms.

  • CornetMustich

    Jeez, dumb business move....
    Cheers, Joe Mustich, Justice of the Peace, Washington Green, CT USA

  • Speaking as a 100% straight person, what I would look for in a business involved in the wedding industry is one that is willing to cater to every whim of the betrothed to make their special day memorable, no matter what. The customer is always right, and customer service comes first.

    I guess I'll cross this "Here comes the Bride" moron off my list of vendors.

  • hyhybt

    As much as I despise the expression "the customer is always right," because it's so often used by those who are being beyond-the-pale unreasonable (for instance, demanding you sell items that do not exist), I have to agree here.

  • red_zone

    Well, this woman pretty much confirmed a serious loss of business from her attitude.

    Not to all such businesses; in the midst of a recession, it is NEVER a good idea to turn away business based on some pseudo-moral superiority. Because not only will that guarantee a lawsuit, but a significant loss of business .

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