After losing $54 billion in the years 2007-2008 under this other president whose name we've already forgotten, Wall Street made a record $61.4 billion in 2009 and another $20 billion in 2010 since President Obama took office. Democrats also seriously diluted any attempts at serious financial reform. Yet none of this makes Obama's task of bleeding Wall Street for campaign contributions any easier. They're still upset that Barry called them "fat cats," which totally came off wrong. Look how cute these Persian longhair kitties are!

Today's Times details the administration's revamped efforts to court Wall Street donors, knowing full well that they'll probably fall short of 2008's $89 million. He invited them for a Q&A session at the White House before he even announced his reelection campaign, and there's a fundraiser at Daniel on the Upper East Side later this month. He's also stepped up his efforts to "recruit high-level bundlers, supports who recruit other donors." It's kind of like Amway only it's how our country elects its leaders.

Yet he's still not getting through to his Republican donors who in 2008 were looking for a more "pragmatic" president. One, a Greenwich, Connecticut hedge fund manager told the paper "He seemed like he was going to be a transformative candidate." Get in line, pal. Who's this guy donating to instead? Mitt Romney. Geez, what does Obama have to do to prove to you guys that he's on the level? Hire a former head of JPMorgan Chase as his chief of staff?