Well I've reviewed all the comments concerning this story and my thinking goes as follows . Do I have a problem giving up my seat on the train to a Pregnant, Elderly, Or Handcapped Person ? 99% of the time no . But then there are those times when you have one of them days where things just don't go your way shit happens where you just want to get your train , Start your music, and drift away too that "Favorite place " . We all have them , where everything is just right and there are no issues, problems, just smooth sailing . When I get into one them moods and turn on my jams . I'm done ! I'm drifting off to sleep and the "Do Not Disturb" Sign is posted . Selfish ? Maybe depends on your prospective , Do you do my job ? Do you have to deal with the types of Assholes that I do ? Everyone situation is different .

Hm. Yuppie business men least likely to give up their seats for pregnant women. Apparently they're just as selfless and kind on their way to work as they are in their professions. Is this supposed to surprise me?

I keep hearing the most hysterical announcement on the trains... "Courtesy is contagious". HAHAHA! Really? Where?? I have yet to believe that statement.

Actually, when I give up my seat I often see very-guilty-looking faces. Maybe, just maybe, those guilty ones might be the next ones to give up their seat. Don't underestimate the power of shame.

Why are you waiting to be asked for your seat? When I see a pregnant woman, elderly or handicapped person, or anyone who looks like they can't stand, I offer my seat. Sometimes they say no. I spent some time in a cast and was shocked at how rude and selfish people are when it comes to being polite. Reading your book is more important? This has nothing to do with feminism or chivalry - common courtesy is part of basic humanity. We couldn't built societies without it.

"Why are you waiting to be asked for your seat?
> Because I was seated there first , and I would like to keep it ! So if you want it you better ask me ! That's called by courteous to me !

When I see a pregnant woman, elderly or handicapped person, or anyone who looks like they can't stand, I offer my seat.

> Congrats to you sir ! God will smile down on you for " chivalry" .

Sometimes they say no.
>Well Atleast you tried . No shame in that .

I spent some time in a cast and was shocked at how rude and selfish people are when it comes to being polite.

>So you were in a cast and it was difficult for you to get around, Who's fault is that ? Should we feel bad for you ? What so because the people on that train didn't look up and hop out of their seats to offer them to you . That makes them Selfish, and rude ? How so ? Just because you unfortunately had to wear a cast everybody has to bend over backwards to show sympathy ? Please spare me your bullshit !<

Reading your book is more important?

> Only when I see you get on the train with your cast sir <

"This has nothing to do with feminism or chivalry"

->It doesn't ? Really ? So what's the basis of your arguement ? On one hand you think society should be courteous till it hurts ! On that other hand your bitching about feminism . The two are polar opposites sir . Courtesy references treating women as if special, Like the way men treated women in the fifties . ( Barefoot and Pregnant) Feminism references the struggles women went through for equal rights . (Not only in the eyes of the law, But specifically Amoungst Men ) <

common courtesy is part of basic humanity.
> Finally something I can give you props for stating ! It is a part of basic humanity, Just not as overbearing as you may believe.<

We couldn't built societies without it.

> Not true . Totally false ! You couldn't more wrong about that ! Our cities from the beginning were built by Men . They were run By Men ! They were Maintained by Men . The vast majority of Our technological theory,ideology, were from the brilliant minds of *Drumroll Please* Men ! Sure Courtesy Or excuse me "Respect" played an integral part in the building of great cities, But that was by the hand of the Men Sadly . There now Sir ! Your Shit has been Totally Debunked ! Have a great day .

It is entirely possible that reading a book makes it unlikely that one is paying attention to who is standing around them.

Possible.

women want to be treated as equals, that means that you have to suck it up & accept the negative sides of equality, so stop complaining because you got what you were asking for.

Wow. You sound like you're probably pretty popular with the ladies.
So, that whole equality thing.. that means being YOUR equal right? On second thought.. yeah, no thanks.

Yeah, I can't wait for men to become pregnant, like in the movie Junior.

I'm curious which demo takes up multiple seats with bags or that wide open legs thing, depriving pregnant women of a seat in the first place.

It's amazing how defensive people have gotten over my little informal study. Sure, it's passive-aggressive. But there are legitimate safety reasons for a pregnant woman to sit.

For those of you who said "just ask"? Do you wait for the blind, elderly, or infirm to ask too? Why put that on them to have to ask for help rather than offering it first?

And whom should I have asked? Is it then unfair in your minds if I only chose men?

I DID ask for seats, many, many times, and I was VERY visibly pregnant in the middle of summer. (See silhouette!) It's true pregnant ladies sometimes politely refuse--sometimes it's just too hard to get back up! But does that mean you can't be kind and offer? Don't take it personally!

My wife has been through three pregnancies and your observations are right on the money. At some point a woman actually told her straight up that she would not make room for her because it was her choice to be pregnant.

I can't wait for the follow-up when it comes to getting a stroller down the steps into a subway station. Or maybe about getting into an elevator with a stroller. You'll have plenty future opportunities for more passive aggressiveness. Love it.

Two points:

1. I've asked pregnant women numerous times if they'd like my seat. I rarely get a yes. Most pregnant women I seem to bump into don't feel the need to have a seat if they don't just get one. A few times I've just gotten up and directed her to my seat anyway out of guilt.

2. Did anyone else notice that the train that offered their seat the least is the one that carries the most hipsters other than the L train? And that the L train had a disproportionate number of men offering their seats? I thought that was kinda interesting; apparently fashionably ironic young men are more polite than fashionably ironic young women.

If a pregnant woman asks for your seat on the subway, you should punch her in the face. She deserves it.

(Kidding, kidding!)

While it being nice and courteous to offer a pregnant woman a seat if there is none, it isn't an obligation. I used to consistently offer any woman my seat on the train, until I realized that women learned to abuse the system and will stand right in-front of you and purposefully bump into you to try to get your attention so that you will get up for them. That's taking advantage of the system; so which one is it ladies, equal rights and treatment or not?

To quote Jimmy Dix: "I want to meet the bitch that fucked you up."

Sorry Anton, I'm gonna call b.s. on this one.... I've been an NYC resident for the past 15 years, and I have NEVER seen this 'abuse the system' process that you claim happens frequently on the subway. You sound pretty misogynistic... maybe you are just bitter that some of us are having babies AND making more money than you? Just sayin..... : )

More bs. If someone needs a seat, I am happy to give it if asked. It serves no one to make a commotion offering seats to people who are going one stop, or prefer to stand. A woman is pregnant, so what. She can communicate. The ones who then refuse, may be rude or may have thier own reasons for requiring a seat. The assumption that a person is rude becasue they dont pop up at the sight of a pregnant woman is dumb. Who is supposed to do the popping up? Everyone within ten feet, or just the youngest male. How fast is each prosepctive offerer expected to asses who is the most or least able to stand? Bunch a crapola.

Wish this was around when I was working in midtown and carrying my first child. I remember one woman offering me her seat on the E train. Once. Otherwise, I was left to fight for a seat. I also couldn't believe the number of times a non-pregnant, faster person would steal my cab!