Possible future Governor of New York State Carl Paladino knows how to close a deal! While his rival Andrew Cuomo entered the election's home stretch by rallying his supporters and campaigning, Paladino knew all he had to do was kick back, crack open a cold one, and remind everyone that the only reason he's running for office is because his son tragically died in a car accident last year. Check and mate, Cuomo—and while you were out there breaking a sweat, Paladino had plenty of free time to celebrate Halloween in a Buffalo bar with a guy in blackface, thus proving that Paladino can't be racist, because he has a (temporarily) black friend.

In the last-minute video plea, Paladino tells voters how his unlikely gubernatorial bid came to be. "I knew it was a very mischievous and not too endearing of an effort to do," Paladino says in the 13-minute video. "But I figured I could do it... because I had my son on my shoulder and that's what his life was about. It was about helping people." People like the revelers at South Buffalo watering hole Potter’s Field, just down the block from Carl’s house. Note the look of barely suppressed fear in the eyes of the smiling young woman in the Paladino headlock. We can relate.

In other news, former governor George Pataki, whom Paladino once called a "degenerate idiot," endorsed Paladino today. "I stand strong with Governor Pataki to lead this revolution to take back our state," Paladino said in a statement today. "The man who slayed the first Cuomo says I am the man to beat Mario Jr." Take it easy, Carl; this is a democratic election, not Beowulf.