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Taste Testing Pop-Tarts Sushi From Pop-Tarts World

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Tien Mao/Gothamist

For day two of our zone-flooding Pop-Tarts World Grand Opening coverage, we asked the fine folks at Pop-Tarts to send over a sample of their instantly infamous "Pop-Tart Sushi." The delicacy contains no seafood, but consists of three kinds of Pop-Tarts minced and then wrapped in a Fruit Roll-Up. Brand synergy or unholy commingling? As several employees of Gothamist LLC milled around the sushi—hesitant to try something so transgressive—publisher Jake Dobkin seized the chopsticks. And lived.

"Like Proust's madeleine, the taste of the Pop-Tarts sushi instantly took me back to my childhood," Dobkin said, in a statement released after his emergence from the men's room. "Specifically, memories of attempting to eat bubblegum and graham crackers at the same time. I guess that's why I never tried that again." Thankfully, our complimentary Pop-Tarts tote bag also included four different varieties of classic Pop-Tarts: Chocolate Fudge, Hot Fudge Sundae (both with and without frosting), Strawberry (with and without frosting), and Frosted Brown Sugar Cinnamon. Oh, happy day.

So far we've tried the Hot Fudge Sundae and the Chocolate Fudge, and, contrary to the opinions of some, Pop-Tarts taste great toasted... like a light show in your mouth. Which is why we can't wait to see the actual light show inside Pop-Tarts World, which "frosts" visitors with a red light and a white light, followed by pulsating lights "of all different colors to mimic the sprinkles," finally climaxing with "another really bright light" to evoke wrapping the tarts in foil, a publicist tells the Times. And lest this post seem too much like a Pop-Tarts commercial, here are some actual Pop-Tarts commercials from the '80s and '90s.

Contact the author of this article or email tips@gothamist.com with further questions, comments or tips.

Comments [rss]

  • Cannibal

    Well at least they know that the moron target market for Pop Tarts World will also be dazzled by bright flashing lights...

  • Patrick

    I stand by what I have said for a long ass time, Pop Tarts Suck Toasted! For life! http://ptst.org/

  • Cannibal

    Umm.. are people expected to pay money to consume the brightly colored objects on the left? I call bullshit.

  • Pålægpåtoppenafsmørrebrød

    Fuck PopTarts, I moved on to Toaster Strudels and never looked back.

  • Oh Almighty Walrus King

    ooh, ooh, i can see my office window in that picture! hello, me! get back to work!

  • asakasan

    I'm hoping the cliche of referencing Proust is an attempt at irony.

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