Darth Vader Robs Bank (Photos, Oh Yes, Photos)

It seems the Empire has fallen on hard times. Presumably to get finishing funds for his latest Death Star, Darth Vader—or a man pretending to be Darth Vader?—was reduced to robbing a bank on Long Island this morning. Impotent Rebel Alliance security forces tell Newsday (paywall) that Vader marched into a Chase bank in Setauket around 11:30 a.m. today. Brandishing a completely unnecessary handgun—as he had the power to choke the oxygen out every teller's throat—the fallen Jedi demanded cash.

It's unclear whether he also found their lack of faith disturbing, but one Rebel policeman says, "The teller complied with the robber's demands and gave him money from the drawer." Vader is described as 6 feet, 2 inches tall, also wearing camouflage pants, and was last seen boarding a starfighter headed in the direction of Long Island's sinister Sith stronghold, in Valley Stream. (Isn't this also where Improv Everywhere has their headquarters?) Below, a surveillance photo from the teller's point of view:

Update 7/23: Witnesses say bank customers thought it was a joke at first—but then Darth Vader used the Force.

Update 7/24: Now it's reported that Darth Vader truly was trying to do this for the Evil Empire—the Yankees, that is: He threw a Yankees backpack at the teller.

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By John Del Signore in News on July 22, 2010 5:40 PM

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He should have used a Light Saber. Or at least made his gun look like a blaster. I don't know about you but, wouldn't he be easy to spot. Unless of course their was a Star Wars convention in town.

Daniel

Guy on floor screaming " It's a trap! "

Cassandra

Hmmm...I wonder when George Lucas is going to come in demanding his cut.

Amanda Harletsch

is dick chenney into robbing banks now

Byron

"That's no bank. It's a credit union."

borgbot

Freaking best post ever

costumefly

I want to hear him breathe...

DrBob

Lets get real here. If the real Darth Vader were to rob a bank, he would escape in his personal TIE fighter. If the perp was seen leaving in a starfighter her was a rebel imposter!

Wza

He was upset there were no Galactic Republic ATM's in Long Island.

Leena B

This is classic! I wish I could see the pictures. Audio would be great.

TequilaMockingbird

Yeah, if he would have been able to pull it off using a lightsaber, that would have been good, but even better would be using the Jedi mind trick.

Robber Vader: "You don't need to raise the alarm."

Banker: "We don't need to raise the alarm."

Robber Vader: "The money in the vault is for me."

Banker: "The money in the vault if for you."

Robber Vader: "You can go about your business."

Banker: "I can go about my business. Next, please!"