Tonight is the NBA's draft lottery, where teams learn what their pecking order will be in the actual draft, which is on June 24. Since the Nets had the worst record in the league—12-70—they have the best chance of getting the first pick (due to a weighted lottery system) and are guaranteed no lower than the fourth pick. And guess who's excited for the new season? The Nyets' new owner, Mikahil Prokhorov—at least, we think he's excited, though his video address to fans shows him to be, uh, pretty calm. But he's funny too, because he's expecting the team to make the playoffs next year, with a championship in one year minimum, five years max:

The Star Ledger points out, "Indeed, Prokhorov's expectations are lofty, especially for a team that struggled to notch double-digits in the wins column this past season. But when you're 6-8 with an estimated net worth of $13.4 billion, any dream -- no matter how big -- seems within reach."

And the Knicks aren't in tonight's draft lottery. See, six years ago they traded their first round pick to the Phoenix Suns—in order to get Stephon Marbury—who then traded it to the Utah Jazz. NBA.com says, "If [Utah's pick] happens to land in the top three (it has an eight percent chance of doing so), it would just add to the misery of Knicks fans, who would probably like to fast forward to July 1 either way."