Tiger Woods' Mistresses Left Out Of His Apology!

**sniff** **sniff**

I'm sooooooo sorrryyyyy!

Waaaaaahhh! I'm taking sex rehab!

Leave me alone! No questions!

With great wealth and idolatry comes great responsibility. I'm glad that Haiti stuff has all blown over so we can get back to important news like this. I pray for Tiger in this time of National crisis and reconciliation.

These Women received gifts, money for sex, which makes the WHORES not Mistresses. The press need to call them what they are!

who really cares about what a talking dick has to say?!

Go and fuck something tiger.

"Hey B*tches, I'm sorry, but I was only there for p*ssy and a f*ck. Nothing serious, just pillow talk. Now can we move on?"

Whores don't get apologies.

Whores should apologize to their parents.

Do we really give a shit about this anymore?

I don't want to hear about Tiger Woods again until he back on the golf course, where he belongs.

I can't believe our society cares that he screwed a bunch of whores.

He's a golfer, not a priest!

You know what would have been awesome? If Tiger had gone out there and said:

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry all of you dumb motherfuckers were deluded enough to think that any professional athlete, ever, was a suitable role model for yourself or your kids. I'm sorry that that nation's priorities are so screwed up that any newspaper in country, nevermind all of them, devoted more than an inch of print to this story when there are only twenty people it matters to: me, my wife, my children and the sixteen strippers I was banging on the side.

"But since we're all here and you don't seem to be going away, here's a bit of truth: professional athletes are assholes. To get to the top of any professional sport, even a half-assed one like golf, requires a level of mental obsession and physical commitment that no sane person would ever endure. You probably pat yourself on the back if you do half an hour of cardio work in the gym three days a week. For me, or Tom Brady, or god forbid a mutant like Matthew Phelps, that's called a warm-up, and we do it before we've had breakfast, every day of the week. Then the real work starts. It's difficult, it hurts, and it breaks the body down: we require teams of trained physicians, masseurs, trainers and physical therapists just to make sure that we don't snap every ligament in our bodies. Let me repeat: no sane person does this.

"So why do we? Why do I do it? First, because we are hyper-competitive obsessives. The idea of not being the best, of not enduring any amount of agony if it even slightly increased the chances of winning is almost physically unbearable. If my trainer told me that I could cut three points off my handicap by beating my own mother to death, I'd say 'sorry, ma' as I reached for the 9-iron and started wailing away on her.

"But second and much more important, in the words of the great philosopher Tony Montana: 'First you get the money. Then you get the power. Then you get the women.' Champion athletes are made, not born, and they're made when little Johnny sixth-grader realizes that the high school varsity quarterback gets to date the head cheerleader. Trust me: there is no greater motivating force on earth than a teenage boy's desire for pussy. We all do this (even the gay ones, hey Johnny Weir) because we know for a fact that the benefits package for this job includes unlimited access to fantasy-grade trim. And all you poor slobs out there wishing you were Drew Brees know this too. It's part of why you watch us, maybe even the biggest part.

"By the way, I'm pretty sure this is how it works for female pros as well: they're just usually a lot smarter about not getting caught out in public. But if you think that the WNBA doesn't have enough drama to match the Michigan Womyn's Music Festival, then I've got a bridge to sell you.

"So yeah, I fucked around. I liked them blond, jiggly and none-too-smart, and for the last ten years it's been hot and cold-running bimbos flowing freely any time I wanted to open the tap. The mistake I made wasn't dogging around, but marrying someone who cared, and not being smart enough to screw the ones who wouldn't go running to the newspapers. But given half a chance, I'll do it all again, because did I mention that I'm a hyper-competitive asshole, and did I mention that without that urge I'd pretty much suck at golf?

"So go ahead and take your shots: you thought I was one thing and I turned out to be another, and I know that makes some of you really mad. You feel like having me shill for an insurance company meant that I was somehow committing to living a life of calm risk-aversion. Motherfuckers, do I look like an actuary to you? This is what I am, this is part and parcel of why I'm a champion, and if any of you were honest with yourselves for even a minute, you'd admit that and tell your kids that maybe they should pick some better heroes. Of course, you'd best not ask too many questions about what firefighters do in their off hours either.

"Thank you and good night. Oh, and that hot blonde number in the back? Call me!"

Cat got your tongue?

Touche. What can I say, I got on a roll.

I thought Tiger was the one on a roll.

Why should he apologize to his mistress again? They knowingly engaged in a sexual affair knowing he had a wife. The chick from playboy needs to shutup that's why she is a bunny(Young dumb and full of c*m).Her implants are probably leaking.

Anybody else think that he looks like the Shroud of Turin in the News photo? You can bet his wife is using his balls for putting practice.

I don't understand how this became such a big story when every man in America is thinking "He's a billionaire athlete, he can screw an endangered species of bird if he wants."

The tramps are always going to get left off the apology list. Thank God that hasn't changed. But. Tiger missed a tremendous opportunity to reintroduce a 3 step program to America.

1.Go back to work.

2.Divorce if you must.

3. Never speak of it again.

Tiger is now a pussy-cat, declawed, denutted, and Emasculated.

I don't think the skanks are looking for apologies as much a a foothold into lawsuits that are bound to happen. One of them claims she had 2 abortions, paid for by Tiger, after having been impregnated by him. If there's any merit to that accusation and it can be proven, she can then claim he forced her to "kill" her child or children and that has damaged her beyond repair. This could be a Tort Lawyer's dream come true. This is just the beginning.

Men do the stupidest things for poon.

pfff. why the hell should he apologize to the only people that got in to this knowing full well what was going on?

oh yeah. for the same reasons they did it to begin with. the attention.

I'm tired of this story as well.

But I have to ask. Why on earth do these women want apologies? For what? I totally don't get it. They all slept with a married man. They knew it. They thrust themselves into the public eye trying to rake in $$ over this story. They have LAWYERS for chrissake. Why?? Every woman in that group is so disgusting. I truly hope he learned his lesson.

because if he apologizes they get to seem like victims instead of the scabby little skanks that they are. They're almost grosser than Tiger.

He owes an apology to his wife and kids..nobody else. I'm tired of hearing about this story already.

well he does owe apologies to people who were suckered into worshipping him because he supposedly represented good values and inundated the public with "I AM TIGER WOODS" commercials. When you start to self identify and live vicariuously through his golf triumphs while he exploits that connection and tries to sell you shitty buicks and expensive nike gear. I always new he was shifty cause look at his bug eyes! people always said he looked like he was determined but to me it was always pervy.

Tiger looks different because he's not wearing a baseball cap that used to cost millions to wear.

No one gives a damn about this guy anymore. You put any guy in his position and most would try to lay the dick down as much as he did. He should get a divorce and start from scratch.

The tramps want a personal apology? For what? They should fake apologize to everyone too ; because we have to be bombarded with story after story about it. Some of these women will make out even better than what they thought they could have bargained for. Would they have us believe that these were all meant to be forever private, discreet affairs? Please. He's Tiger Woods.Professional skank and major butter face Veronica Siwik-Daniels, aka Joslyn Jame's porn comeback will be a nice windfall.

Tiger just wanted to plant his seed in different kinds of women.

monogamy is soooooo last century.

In the pix, Tiger looks a bit different. Perhaps the results of the cosmetic surgery he required, which kept him out of the public eye for months? Because his wife really smashed his face up with a golf club? It's possible the physical beating he took might have a greater affect on his golf game than these admitted dalliances.

He sounded totally insincere and I'll bet bet his wife knew it and that's why she wasn't there. Lupica has it right.