Park Slope Parents Still Bringing Babies To Bars

Gothamists, Im a reporter with the New York City News Service and wrote about the "babies in bars issue."

Tell me how you really feel...take my survey:

http://sandeep.journalism.cuny.edu/2010/10/16/babies-in-nyc-bars-space-invaders/

I have been bartending for 15 years in Brooklyn and 90% of the time, at some point, the children that accompany the adults to the bar become a nuisance. I have watched children run amok, handling candles and blowing them out, throwing things on the floor and running around the tables and the bar. The parents, who I'm sure deserve their alcohol, barely discipline them. There might be mild threats but there is no follow through. "Don't make me count to 3! One! Two! Do you want to go home? One! Two! If you do it agin we're going home! One! Two!" Ummmm... I'm no math wizard but it seems you're more interested in drinking than properly rearing your child. Your empty threats are creating monsters. We don't find your child to be charming or creative. If the child is old enough and mature enough to control themselves and draw quietly at happy hour, I'm cool with it. It's a public place and it's up to each establishment to create their own regulations regarding children. Just do as all a favor and take the kid home if they start fussing. I kick out loud and obnoxious adult drunks all the time so 'Little Johnny' won't get any special treatment either.

When I see a baby or young child at a bar I'm always most concerned about their hearing. If I'm shouting to be heard across the table and have ringing in my ears at the end of the night I hate to think of what the sound level is doing to the sensitive ears of a child. Your kid doesn't deserve early onset hearing loss because your social life is of higher priority.

This is ridiculous.

If there's a bar that allows parents to bring their infants, children, kids, teens - what have you - in, and you don't like it then don't patronize that business. It really doesn't matter why you don't like it (moral outrage! ambience destruction! health violations!) .. just don't give that business your money. If they lose enough offended customers to change their business practice, then well, they've learned. If not, then good for them.

If 20-year old (plus change) non-native New Yorker Risa thinks that this particular bar is HER spot and that she shouldn't have to find a new bar.. well, Risa, chances are those annoying parents have been regulars there a lot longer than you. If so, hey, you're lucky they haven't asked the barkeep to keep you and your friends out of the bar.. or written a snarky complaint about entitled, noisy 20-something year old yuppies trying to live out their Sex and the City fantasy.

A bar's a bar .. and there are thousands around the city. You'll find a few you like out there, I guarantee that.

Entitled twenty-somethings need to stop whining, grow up and move somewhere much more interesting than Park Slope. Most of you are going to move to Connecticut or Long Island as soon as you get married and you're done with your little adventure in the city any way. Get over the fact that whole bunch of parents with little kids are -- gasp -- actually cooler than you.

Bravo!

if you can't afford a sitter, you can't afford a night out. no one want's to spend their leisure time with your damn kids, not even your friends.

What I don't get about this story is ,Why in the hell would any parent bring their child too a bar ? That's like a father taking his baby too his job as a garbage man ! I tell you things going on today really make a sane person stop, Look, and shake there head in amazement at the things people do !

Spell much?

There really isn't much to this story. Parents with kids in bars have already won the fight. This is nothing more than the losers licking their wounds.

What kind of bullshit is this, kids in bars. Hell, don't folks go into bars to get away from infants. Some people get away with all types of crap in certain areas. Mothers keep you asses home and get hammered in private, like self respecting folks have been doing since forever. Who wants to see a drunken mother staggering down the street attempting to navigate a stroller. Good lord

Changing table at the Bohemian Beer Garden, Astoria

http://queenscrap.blogspot.com/2010/01/yellow-liquid-and-sausage-at-bohemian.html

www.forgotten-ny.com

I don't think babies should be allowed in bars. This is coming from a bartender who worked at a restaurant bar. I'm sure that if wailing babies were in the bar part of the restaurant the regular clientèle would simply find somewhere else to go. If you have kids and want to drink out, go to a restaurant, sit at a table, and order something. Or if your kids are old enough to sit at a table by themselves, have them sit at a table within sight of the bar and enjoy a drink. Restaurants are fine for kids, but at a bar bar, babies just aren't really welcome. The environment isn't the best for them (ie. swearing and such, not to mention occasionally rowdy atmspheres), and the babies detract from the environment for the people who do want to just sit at a bar, especially if the kids cry. Babies have enough kid-friendly places. Why invade an adult-oriented hang-out spot too?

i am a bar owner in bay ridge, brooklyn. i do not allow parents to bring children into my bar. the people that come in with babies seem to be baffled that i do not allow them in my establishment. bars are for people to go get a drink, and with that trouble may happen. this can be from someone at your bar who is drunk or someone who has just walked in from the street bombed looking for a drink. even though my place is relaxed and fight free, i can not take responsibility for someone else s misbehavior that may cause harm to a child. recently on thurday night a park slope like couple tried to bring their baby into the bar at 1030pm. in my book that is a no no. parents used to bring kids into the bar more often years ago but in my estimation that is never a good idea.

That's ok, bring your baby to a bar. But don't be shocked when he/she gets knocked into, stepped on, drinks spilled on, hurt by candle/non baby-proof environment. THAT MAKES YOU A BAD PARENT. If you can't figure out why it may not be a good idea to bring your baby to the bar, you are already a bad parent.

I take both of my kids to a number of bars and pubs. We hang out, play chess, get a drink or two, talk up the bartenders and owners, and generally engage in the types of activities that people do when they are part of a community. We tip well, are well-behaved, and do not expect or want anyone to modify their behavior just because the kids are around.

The "kids don't belong in bars" credo is a simpleton's mantra. Become a real part of your community, understand its microculture, and you'll figure that out quickly.

And if you don't, Ohio's keeping a light on for you.

If these people are that concerned about babies being in bars then they aren't drinking enough. They have their judgmental heads so far up their fucking asses to focus on what they should be doing in a bar-that would be drinking. They need to lighten the fuck up. I grew up in Manhattan in the late 60s and was used to parents bringing their kids into the bars to meet up with their friends. Was it the best environment to be in? Probably not-but my parents got half a load on and left me the fuck alone for most of the day... These 20 somethings probably have uptight parents who wouldn't know how to have a good time if it bit them in the ass. If the parents who bring their kids into a bar these days object to foul language they need to fuck off as well. The kids will be hearing those words soon enough

the problem is the parents trying to regulate the bar and asking people to watch their language; i have a huge problem with that.

If I am out drinking and sobbing about a bad breakup, I don’t want my cries to compete with those of an infant sitting next to me.

Because nothing is more fun in a bar than a sobbing drunken girl who thinks no one will ever marry her! I'd rather hang out with the babies - at least they only cry if they have to eat or have a poopy diaper.

Risa also complains about breastfeeding moms at cafes. I'd love to see Risa in 10 years when she's married and has a kid (unless her breeder slurs mean she's gay). I'm sure she'll change her tune and will think the world should revolve around her kid.

If she is a lesbian, if the current trend holds, in 10 years she's even more likely to have a kid. And to live in Park Slope.

First n foremost, I would feel weird trying to go hang out at the bar, with a baby, thinking to myself "aren't I a parent now?"

the bars should rise up, and declare "baby free zones."

I bet the first bar that puts a big ass sign out from stating it's baby free will see it's business skyrocket.

I hope little mikey gets to hit on girls and touch boobies while he is enjoying his beer, after all since he is at the bar being an adult he should be able to engage in some adult behaviour.

Park Slopers: just leave your kid on the grate when you go in for a quick fifth.

The right to drink alcohol in a public bar is GOD GIVEN! Keep the F**king kids OUT! And while we're at it keep out UGLY people! Especially fat chicks with tight skirts and dudes with big guts! Talk about self-absorbed, entitled pricks. How can they go out in public looking like that?! I can't count the number of times I was sickened by having to look at some clueless itchy crotch trying to get laid while I was just trying to enjoy a refreshing drink.

Going out to public bars is obviously too stressful for you. Maybe you should just stay home and drink.

As long as the kid can hold his liquor, I don't see a problem.

I took my daughter (9 months) who was asleep in a stroller to a bar in Cobble Hill last Saturday at 3pm.

Had a nice quiet pint, until she woke up, whereupon I left and came home. I would have stayed with her if I'd have fancied another, but didn't.

What's the fucking problem people ?

Lighten up.

Most people probably wouldn't have a problem with a sleeping infant at 3pm, but thats very different from a screeching toddler at 9pm.

I live in the PS area, and what I hate most about this phenomenon is when parents ask bar patrons to "watch their language" in front of their kids. In my opinion, when a kid is in a bar, they're on the adults turf. Its not Chucky Fucking Cheese.

On the rare occasion parents bring their kids into my local, I curse louder. Fuck 'em.

I suggest you Park Slope drinkers do the same. Or talk about your sex life really loudly and in great detail.

that's not right, you don't see me going to the circus and kicking the clown in the nuts.

regulars are stuck in a predicament, call SLA and get the bar in trouble or do nothing.

Great parenting at work, there goes the future generation of alcoholics. :~)

It seems the ever charming Ms. Chubinsky wrote a now-abandoned blog called "Stroller Kill" (classy) where she complains about Park Slope and strollers and kids. Here's an idea: MOVE SOMEWHERE ELSE.

Also, I wonder if the Times would publish the word "fag" in the same context as this moron uses the word "breeder."

What ever happened to the idea that breeders should move to the suburbs? It was good enough for my grandparents, and parents, and my friends who started having "loindroppings" (Thanx Mr. Shankly!)

Really, when I was a kid woods, rivers, and streets you could play baseball and ride a bike on were cool! I didn't realize what I was missing until I was 16 and discovered rock n roll and started to hang out in bars!

Babies do not belong in bars. Especially during happy hour when the place gets packed, the music is playing loudly and you can't use the restroom because someone is changing diapers. My friends who have kids hire babysitters when they want to go out.

I think these parents are just trying to raise their kids to grow up to become alcoholics.

Enough is enough! I have had it with these monkey-fighting babies in these Monday-to-Friday bars!

(Alternate version, edited for television -- and Gothamist's filters.)

Loindroppings belong at home with the young, hot baby sitter.

Daddy needs eye candy.

I saw a couple bring their 1 year old daughter to The Gate in Park Slope...and they let the infant drink sips of beer. Now, I'm not opposed to letting a 3 year old try some beer so they can realize they won't really like it, but the 1 year old actually liked it...and the couple thought it was funny, so they just let the kid sip beer for 1/2 an hour. Welcome to The Slope.

It ain't just the slope. My Bud drinking midwestern father put beer in my baby bottles.

Bud? I was raised on Balantine XXX Ale!

(Thanx Dad!)

Boy, do I miss Ballantine XXX Ale as well as Ballantine Old India Pale Ale, the real deal before all the brew pub concoctions with the same name.

The doctor told my mother to drink Guinness during her pregnancy because it has lots of vitamins and carbs. That is why my eyes are so close together.

My drinking midwestern father always had us kids drink the foam off the top of his beer.

Is it just me or does this girl sound way more annoying than most babies?

I live in Park Slope. I don't have a kid. I knew what I was getting into. Its like going to a bar on the LES & complaining about dirty scumster & NYU kids, or a bar in the Meatpacking District filled with Jersey Shore cast members, or a bar in Willimsburg filled with skinny jeaned beardo hipsters. Quit complaining, kid.

it's just you and a few other people.

holding it against someone because they are uncomfortable with poorly attended-to toddlers reaching for beers on their table and the rent's keeping bottles on the bar means you either haven't experienced this or perpetrate it yourself.

Yep that is what it means. Orrrrrr it could mean that I don't have kids, go to these same bars in my neighborhood (Park Slope) & don't mind because I'm not a 20 something entitled jackass?

OMG THEIR BOTTLE IS ON THE SAME TABLE AS YOU!!! CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT!

I think it's finally time to bring back smoking in bars.

Was going to mention Doray Tavern.

But got nothing to say.

That is all.

*Nothing* to say about the Doray Tavern? With the billions of stories that place had seen in 109 years?

funny... the one time i encountered this sort of this was in park slope. and i definitely thought it inappropriate. but seeing as how i haven't lived in NYC my whole life or ride a bicycle, my opinion doesn't count on gothamist.

Why is everyone so shocked? It's Park Slope parents. These are the same parents that let their children ride their bikes into you on the sidewalk, and then look at you like YOU did something wrong with no apologies. There is a real sense of entitlement that these kids are being taught...no manners, no boundaries. Come to think of it, the kids are probably the one's making the decision to go to the bar, and the parents just go along with it. This is why my husband and I have decided to move out of the Slope now that our kids are starting to get bigger. We believe that parents should be parents and not always treat children as equals...it's is very valuable lesson in raising children to be good adults (and not assholes). The line is way too blurred in Park Slope.

Are you seriously complaining about kids riding on the sidewalk? Listen, I hate bikers on the sidewalk as much as anybody, but KIDS?

I can't get enough of the people here complaining about how entitled these parents are-- you realize your expectation that you should be able to binge drink on your own terms & only your own terms makes YOU the entitled prig, right?

If you actually read what I wrote you will understand that the point is not kids riding bikes on the sidewalk. The point is kids not paying attention and literally riding INTO people and not apologizing. And the parents look at you like it was YOUR fault. When I was growing up my parents would have grabbed me and taught me to pay attention to my surroundings, and to apologize to people.

Can you imagine these kids in 15 years? They're going to be such little pricks.

not complaining about the kids. kids are kids. complaining about parents who don't have the decency to give a friendly "sorry about that" when their kid jams into you, so as you can reply "no problem! have a nice day"

Exactly.

Agreed. It's not that Park Slope parents are a phenomenon unto themselves- it's that they were already a bunch of shitty entitled assholes bunched up in a neighborhood together and then happened to begin breeding. Hence, the park slope parent was born. But, as long as I can remember, PS has always been full of whiny, rude-beyond-all-belief, entitled asses.

obviously you didn't grow up in park slope....the slope in 80's and 90's was not the yuppie infested million dollar brownstone neighborhood it is now. park slopers of pervious decades would never argue over bringing babies to bars because they had more important things to worry about like working class and immigrant families struggling in a gang, drug and violence infested community. get real. shut up about things you know nothing about or move back to where ever it is you're from.

No. I was born in 1982. Hence the part where I where I say "as long as I can remember...".

So, I guess that unless you were born before the Koren war your observations can't be shared. And the "move back to wherever you came from" - midwest crap is really really really tired at this point. About as crusty and old as your face.

well grandma, i was born in 1984 and i assure you my face is neither old nor crusty (nor will my young attractive body be ruined in a few short months due to reproduction). i just happen to know the history of where i live. and if you don't like the "move back to the midwest crap" maybe you should just go back and be queen of the donut hut again...or whatever the fuck y'all do out there.

How long have you been in the Slope. It was not like that in the '70s. Or at least that's what my mom tells me (I was too little to remember.

The fairly new Double Windsor is also infested with babies and toddlers. If it was 3pm I would say ok, but happy hour? Breeders, if you want to all go out together, chip in for a sitter.

Wow, Risa...it's Park Slope! Did you even walk around the neighborhood for 5 minutes before you moved there?

I'd suggest you look for something in Williamsburg, but it's only going to be another year or two before all the nouveau-hipsters there will be at the bars changing their babies plaid diapers at the and wiping them down with this year's ironic t-shirts.

i haven't encountered this problem (i don't go to bars in park slope) but what i really dislike is when i saw all the tiny babies at the mccarren pool parties and concerts. that music is loud!!! those poor lil children will be deaf by the time they can walk!! whatever happened to baby-sitters? it gives the parents a break and is fun for the tots too.

I don't see why it's a big deal during the day, but at night, no, the baby should be at home sleeping. It seems like nobody understands the concept of getting a babysitter for their kids when they go out these days. When my parents went out at night, they hired some teenage neighbor to watch us and then...here's the REALLY crazy part...they got to enjoy some time to themselves without any kiddies around! You'd think most parents would jump at the chance to go out without their kids.

I SO agree with you!! What is with parents needing to be with their kids constantly?? My parents wanted time to be a COUPLE without their kids around. That doesn't mean they didn't like their children, it meant they could separate adult time from "family time". Couples need to realize that baby will be JUST.FINE without them...sheesh! Friggin' helicopter parents and their tea cup kids!!!!!!!

there used to be this person called a babysitter.

said babysitter could be anyone, people use the babysitter for times when the parents have an engagement that might not allow children.

works pretty well.

Look atchyou! You've got a BABY....! In a BAR...

i'll take the mommies, the babies, and the dogs over bratty 20-somethings ANY DAY. I love the gate and the crowd there.

I think this started becoming much more popular/less taboo after the smoking ban. No point, just an observation.

Probably, but The Gate (bar mentioned in the article) has a nice outdoor area where you can smoke and there is often babies and kids out there.

please tell me that was a reference to The Experts.

Good point.

I used to work in a pretty nice restaurant where parents used to constantly ask to change their babies on a table in the restaurant. We didn't have a changing table in the bathroom, so I understood why they asked. I would always politely inform them that this was not allowed and was not fair to our customers sitting around them. People would get FURIOUS. I think it is completely unhygienic to change your baby on a table where another person is going to eat. While I understand the dilemma, I found it really difficult to be yelled at for something that seemed pretty unreasonable in a fancy place.

That's disgusting and has got to be a violation of all kinds of health codes.

Full disclosure, As a parent I've been in this situation and I would never do it on a table. I agree it is nasty rude and not so clean. But given the regularity I'm suprised no one thought to install a fold down changing table in the bathroom(s). That's a "fancy" feature for a "pretty nice restaurant".

Was that considered?

because the restaurant doesn't want to encourage bringing kids in. Kids in restaurants= small bill, usually no booze, and a mess of macaroni noodles and crayons on the floor for the waiter to pick up.

thats why restaurants don't install changing stations.

Yeah but it sounds like the place in question had lots of kids in. I was thinking it might be good for business. In that case.

I don't drink when I'm with my kid period. It doesn't matter where it is. Even at home I'll wait until he's asleep before opening a beer.

First off, I await the evidence that people are bringing babies to bars (drinking bars, not bar-and-grills) on a regular basis after 6pm.

Furthermore, what kind of a clueless jackass do you have to be to hang out/live in Park Slope and complain about babies? What's next up on Gothamist's plate, distraught families with small children who recently moved to the LES?

hey risa, i don't really care what you want

breeder is such an obnoxious term

Here's a thought. Breeder; It is a derogatory term intended to diminish and classify someone based on their choice of lifestyle. Is that part of criteria for hate crimes? If I spray painted breeder on a townhouse in Park Slope would it be the same crime as other acts of intimidation or just vandalism. I offer as examples spray painting "fags" on the door of a gay neighbor I wanted to have move or swastikas on a Jewish neighbors door?

meant to... classify someone based on their choice of lifestyle."

What's wrong with that? Doesn't 'parents' do the same thing? Or even 'people with babies'?

"Is that part of criteria for hate crimes? If I spray painted breeder on a townhouse in Park Slope would it be the same crime as other acts of intimidation or just vandalism."

Just vandalism, because breeders aren't a protected class.

Some states prohibit discrimination based on "sexual orientation," so in theory they cover every sexual orientation, just as they do every race. That being said, hate crime laws are counterproductive.

That's right protected class. So the distinction rests with a legal technicality and isn't a matter of morality or ethics. That's not enough for me too see it as acceptable.

I demand equal access laws for breeders. I want little wee pint glasses and changing tables in every bar. We are here, our babies cry and shit their pants, get used to it!

What's wrong with that? Doesn't 'parents' do the same thing? Or even 'people with babies'?

"Breeders" is clearly being used in derogative manner whereas parent is not.

I don't see breeder as derogatory any more than I think of the word chick as derogatory. Maybe it used to be but not any more.

Breeder was first used around 1980 by homos to denigrate straights. It still does.

Oh, is there anyone I have not yet offended?

Simple Solution: The bar may deny admission to any baby without a valid ID proving the baby is 21 or over.

While I personally wouldn't bring my son to a bar, I think if it's more of a bar/restaurant type of place, and it's before 6pm (before the after work crowd), it's not such a big deal.

Parents deserve to get out of the house too, and shouldn't be limited to certain places as long as they're considerate.

Agreed. Keep the kid under control, and take it home before it gets late. Sure, parents need adult time, but drinking with your kid around isn't an entitlement.

Most importantly, don't roll your eyes at me for being a drunk jerk around your precious baby.

THIS is a fair comment-- if you are a parent having a drink in a bar with your kid, you don't get to be judgmental of drunken people without kids. You ARE in a bar.

you don't get to be judgmental of drunken people without kids. You ARE in a bar.

A few years ago an acquaintance was watching football in a bar and hurled an expletive because of something that happened in the game. One of several fathers there with his kids asked him to tone down his language.

Well crap if you have an anecdotal example I say we make it illegal.

Like I said, I don't bring my son to bars, but if I did, I'd leave if I was unhappy with the behavior of someone there, rather than rolling my eyes at them. A bar IS a place for adults.

Thank you for saying that. You summed up my thoughts completely!

I agree with you in concept. The sticking point is "as long as they're considerate." Yeah, right. When does that happen? And who even knows what that is anymore?

Are we talking about 10PM here or 3PM? Taking a baby to a bar late at night is a bit weird but during the day? The bars here in Woodside are filled with families...