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This is why we can't have nice things, or dogs in bars: An elderly Queens man says his sex life was ruined (and so was his knee) after he tripped over an "unleashed and unrestrained" dog in a Kew Gardens pub in April. Irving Grossman, 81, is suing Austin's Steak and Ale House, which is popular with gamblers because it has its own Off-Track Betting window. That's exactly where Grossman was headed on that fateful spring day when his luck took a turn for the worse.
The lawsuit claims Grossman suffered "severe pain, shock, mental anguish" after he tripped over a Pomeranian. (Couldn't the dog owner just board it instead of taking it gambling?) The tumble somehow "ruined his sex life" with his wife, Jaclyn, and he tells the Daily News, "What can I say? It's the story of my life. I was in a brace for two months." A manager at Austin's insists the bar doesn't allow dogs inside, but there is one regular customer who is visually impaired and brings a Seeing Eye dog. It's unclear how much Grossman is suing for, but he tells the Post there's one silver lining in his sexless, anguished cloud: "I'm saving a fortune—I'm not gambling at all."
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I'm speechless.
"AARP! AARP!"
You mean 81-year old Irving Grossman is off the market?? Damn!
Hey, less competition for the rest of us. Yeah baby!!!!
Yeah, Jaclyn Grossman broke out her best petticoat (the one without egg stains) and she's at home waiting for you.
oh no, I hope Mr. Grossman gets his groove on. I'm not up for that task.. blah.
Did he break his fall with his junk? I don't get it.
His nickname is "The Crutch"
A seeing-eye Pomeranian? I call bullsh*t.
I've never heard of a pomeranian seeing eye dog.
There's a lot of B.S. in this story....
It seems Mr Grossman is looking for a way to pay off his gambling debt. He is trying to win a different kind of lottery.
Who let the dogs out? This guy has a sex life? At 81? If I was the bar owner I would counter sue his wrinkly ass off
I was there. A man walked into the bar with his Pomeranian and asked for a drink. The bartender told him that he cannot bring a dog into the bar, but the guy said that it’s his seeing-eye dog. The bartender apologized and served him, but that’s when Mr Grossman questioned having a Pomeranian as a seeing eye dog… the man paused and said, "What?!?! They gave me a Pomeranian?!?" The elderly Mr Grossman laughed so hard that he fell forward… on his privates.
Only if his privates is as well endowed as Unkie Milton Berle.
This story is hilarious!
horse racing = murder.
i hope this guy gets his legs broken or worse ... horse racing ?!?! i hope they find him in a dumpster.
Horse racing is not as bad as lame troll attempts.
No horse racing is bad.
"I'm saving a fortune—I'm not gambling at all."
Right...and you were there to just see others gamble or something?
We have a pomeranian (aka- pomermaniac). Thwy will MOVE out of your way before yuo trip on it. They're scared little dogs. What a joke this guy is. It'll simply be dismissed.
You CAN'T board it. It gets upset. Its hair falls out.
I didn’t bring it bowling. I didn’t rent it shoes. I’m not buying it a fucking beer. He’s not taking your fucking turn, Dude.
Man, if my fuckin' ex-wife asked me to take care of her fuckin' dog while she and her boyfriend went to Honolulu I'd tell her to go fuck herself.
i hope when i'm 81 i still have the energy for cold drinks, gambling, hot-lovin', and topping it all off with a steamy lawsuit.
LOLZ
This is how we know our society has become too litigious; when anyone is willing to admit they were taken out by a Pomeranian.