Kirsten Dunst Seduces Courtroom

Earlier we noted that actress Kirsten Dunst was heading to the courthouse today to testify against a Manhattan mechanic accused of stealing the actress's handbags and whatnot, while she was stationed at the SoHo Grand hotel penthouse. 35-year-old James Jimenez now faces 15 years in prison if convicted; his accomplice, Jarrod Beinerman, was already sentenced to 4 years.

The court appearance already took place and CityRoom reports back saying "the stakes [at hand] were lost in Ms. Dunst’s charming, innocent demeanor." Or, you know, the fact that the prosecutor turned fanboy and asked her to name some recent movies she had acted in. She was in, oh, you know (dimples!) Spider-Man and Little Women and stuff. Yes, theft is wrong, but is that resume worth sending a man to jail for 15 years for... for stealing a Balenciaga handbag?

Reportedly after charming the courtroom with her testimony, "She popped up, bit her bottom lip and smiled on her way out."

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By Jen Carlson in News on September 24, 2009 5:20 PM

Comments [rss]

JenChungsBaby

She bit her bottom lip? She has no lips. She looks hot in that photo but I don't like girls who have no lips.

HOTCUP

all of you complaining about the length of the guy's sentence seem to be forgetting that in addition to stealing the handbag, there's also the breaking and entering part of the crime, on top of the fact that they took about $15k worth of stuff in total.

parkj238

yeah, of which her handbag constituted 13K!

Powerhugs

Dunst was a cute little girl in Interview with a Vampire - haven't enjoyed her in anything since...As far as sentencing 15 years - what kind of justice system do we have here these days??? Murderers and rapists have far lighter sentences.

Clarice City

Cool. So I can polish off the six pack in my fridge and go take a drive, maybe mow down a few pedestrians along the way and get out of women's prison, in say three years tops? But steal a washed up actresses fricking handbag and I should plan on the next fifteen as big Rosie's bottom. Got it.

Handbag > Human life

aspiringrapper

She added nothing to Spider-Man but a lower quality of film.

Neil Epstein

So tired of her.

slappy

"felt violated" is what I meant to say.

slappy

I'm sure she violated by the theft. Who wouldn't. The right thing to do would be to have her lawyer ask for conviction and leniency at the same time. "Noblesse oblige" would have been the classy thing to do.

Comic Book Guy

I hope this guy never sees the light of day for hurting my Kiki.

mellow_fellow

Back off, she's mine.

farleft

15 years for stealing a handbag? What the hell is wrong with the USA?

NannyState

Five years for the handbag, ten for the tampons inside which she desperately needed at that tearful moment.

nicemarmot

I'm usually not pro-identical-smile (and I hate those chiclet teeth veneer things), but she really needs to get her teeth fixed. Snaggle teeth are not cute.