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Well, the New York Post earned its fifty cents today. Let's start with the cover, which at first glance seems like a work of fantasy but actually documents a real-life, tough-talking rabbi and his plastic pistol-packing "God Squad." Jewish security forces are hardly new to New York (Hasidic communities like the Satmar Jews in Williamsburg have their own private patrols, for instance), but none have produced a training video as uplifting as this one. A mix of Wes Anderson, Adam Sandler, and the "Sabotage" video, it depicts Rabbi Gary Moscowitz, who was an NYPD cop for nine years and holds a black belt in karate, training his fellow Jews to defend their synagogues. Enjoy!
Moscowitz is founder of the International Security Coalition of Clergy, whose mission is to train Jews in self-defense and advance fighting techniques in the event of a terrorist attack on a synagogue. He says business was slow for his Coalition until May, when the FBI arrested a group accused of plotting to blow up synagogues in The Bronx. But now Moscowitz's 100-hour synagogue self-defense course is in high demand. With his course, you'll learn how to:
- execute a somersault while drawing a gun
- use a table as cover from gunfire
- take down a terrorist by the neck
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it's funny when he says "give me the knife please and those balls." they mean business!
I've never heard that language used when I go to my temple on the high holy days, or anytime for that matter!
Although I totally respect what they're doing, shame on them for agreeing to pose for the photographer wearing the tallit. Way to come off looking like a bunch of clowns.
You make a wonderful point, and you're absolutely right.
Unfortunately, they seem to be of the school that all publicity is good publicity, not realizing that the picture really does look, well, clownish.
Yea, a couple of questions:
1) Is that a tranny in the red because he/she/it has a pony tail and makeup on but looks like a guy.
2) What's with the rabbi holding that orange water gun? If there's an attack on his synagogue he's going to spritz the terrorist with water hoping they'll melt away?
Question 2 is pretty easy to answer:
They don't want to use real guns for training, and there are very specific laws about what a fake gun must look like -- which includes yellow or orange tape on the barrel or the gun being white, yellow, orange, or some other list of approved colors.
Otherwise, carrying an imitation firearm carries the same felony charges as carrying an actual firearm, if unlicensed. (Though I'm sure the people who will be armed will be licensed, they are going to use fake ones while training, no matter what their license situation is...)
"Optimus Prime? He's Jewish?"
http://twurl.cc/1jxu
Yeah! You didn't know?!
I think he is Jewish reform actually.
So how exactly do these pistol packing rabbis guard against a car packed with explosives careening towards their synagogue...
Defending the synagogue from the jews who come at night to paint swastikas on it is serious business.
http://gothamist.com/2008/01/22/man_with_aresen.php
Somersaulting middle aged men will scare the bejesus (or memoses in this case) out of terrorists. Just wait til the advanced classes when they all learn how to do cartwheels.
oh, this should end well.
What, no Desert Eagles?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Desert_Eagle
Is this where Officer Witriol trained?
Just leave the guns out of it, all you need to defend yourself is a plastic card table...and some bawls.
being completely oblivious to how ridiculous you look = great comedy. That's what made early Daily Show segments so great, before people started catching on.
If clerics at a mosque were caught making this video to "protect themselves" they would be arrested as terrorists.
Vigilante rabbis are a scary thought.
Absolutely hilarious.
And I love how they talk ominously about the Bronx bombing plot, which was in fact never a plot, just a bunch of bumbling fools egged on by the FBI.
The best part may be when he tries to slide across the table and it collapses. Not to worry -- I'm sure in real life that plastic table won't collapse when you go all T.J. Hooker on it. (And it will stop bullets, too.)
You know... When the sh&%^ really goes down, I'm not sure I would choose to hide behind a plastic table.
I also love the analysis portion on justifying gun carrying on shabbat. An excellent example of faith. Your clever mastery of semantics will surely fool he whose same should not be said......
Failed terrorists are bumbling fools to be laughed at; those who succeed are monsters. Actually, both are the same. It doesn't take much to kill someone; that bumbling fool, Richard Reid, almost blew up an airplane with his shoes.
I think this guy should worry more about washing his hair than being blown up at a kew gardens temple.
lol, what a bunch of clowns. video gold.
more power to 'em. the glib racist comments aside.
When I was a kid in Brooklyn I had a rabbi who carried a gun. Except he said it was for the niggers (his words, not mine).
what does the mayor say about this? nothing at all?
and what if other clergy were allowed to do this? would it be called terrorism or self-defense? I wonder, hmmmmm....
Oy! Vat a chaloshes mit these rabbis!
"Moscowitz tells the Post, "Jews are not like Christians. If I turn my cheek, I'm coming around to make a kick." "
I wish this guy was President on 9/11. Hey, can I buy you and your friends tickets to Saudi Arabia??