Cop Blames Failed Drug Test On Sweaty Sex

Officer Jon Goldin, an NYPD helicopter pilot who was dismissed for failing a drug test in 2006, has lost his recent appeal, in which he maintained that the cocaine found in his system was the result of "passive ingestion." In other words, the hair sample they tested was coked up because of all the sweaty sex with his druggie girlfriend! (Kind of reminds us of that Seinfeld poppy seed muffin episode!) But when the all snickering subsides, the explanation actually starts to seem somewhat plausible; Goldin, a 15-year veteran of the NYPD who's been straight-edge for years, had 70 friends testify about his relentless sobriety, which even extends to caffeine.

And his now ex-girlfriend Coreen McCarthy (MySpace?) testified on his behalf, too. She swore that she hid her cocaine use from Goldin because she knew he wouldn't tolerate that decadent behavior. They broke up after Internal Affairs told him the results of the failed test, and he confronted her "about possible drug use, at which point she admitted using cocaine." And two medical experts testified that the positive test could have been the result of "incidental exposure."

But an NYPD doctor convinced Supreme Court Justice Eileen Rakower that "the amount of cocaine found in [his] hair samples rendered [his] theory of involuntary ingestion of cocaine through sexual contact with his girlfriend (an admitted cocaine abuser) implausible." Goldin had contested his dismissal after a state appeals court rejected the NYPD's use of hair to test cops for drugs. His lawyer tells the Daily News, "This is a very special human being who devoted his entire life to being a police officer. He would no more use drugs than the man on the moon."