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[UPDATE BELOW] A small but growing collective of shallow, gold-digging sybarites (numbering at least 30) have banded together and formed Dating a Banker Anonymous [DABA], a support group intended to help them cope with the recession's effects on their relationships. The Times got the scoop on this acquisitive little coven, which isn't really anonymous at all, perhaps because these young ladies want to be sure any remaining males with means know they're available. Megan Petrus and Laney Crowell (pictured), both 27, started the group in November because, with their relationships suffering, "We put two and two together and figured out that it was the economy, not us."
Recounting a recent breakup, one charming young lady reminded the group that "next time you are stressing over some finance guy, remember that he is just a math-club nerd. This recession just bought everyone an extra two years of the single life." But don't call them materialists! Ms. Petrus explains, "It’s not even about a $200 dinner. It’s that he’s an alpha male, he’s aggressive, he’s a go-getter, he doesn’t take no for an answer, he’s confident, people respect him and that creates the whole mystique of who he is."
And without that mystique, some DABA members whine that what's left is a just a needy boyfriend with nothing to offer beyond the dubious pleasure of his company. In a post on the DABA blog entitled "Ain’t Messin’ With No Broke Banker," one poor princess writes:
"This whole messy ordeal has advanced my Botox start date by at least two years. Like every other DABA girl, the economy was wreaking havoc on my relationship and youthful good looks...Until - the horror of all horrors - my FBF lost his job, which I guess technically downgrades him to just my BF. Overnight, he went from unavailable to downright clingy. He wants to have dinner every night. By dinner I mean staying in and cooking as Megu is no longer in the budget. AND, FYI DABA girls - chopping vegetables along side your man in a hot New York sized kitchen is NOTHING like the sexy kitchen scene between Mickey Rourke and Kim Basinger in Nine and a Half Weeks. Seriously. It sucks.
Anyhow, he suggested I meet his parents over the holidays... My take on his 180: having no steady source of income for the foreseeable future, he realized that his chances of securing another fashion industry type girl are pretty much zilch and so he is cleaving to me as the last vestige of his former high rolling lifestyle.
Your heart just bleeds for them, doesn't it? Dawn Spinner Davis, a 26-year-old "beauty writer," tells the Times that she knew trouble was brewing when her husband, a private wealth manager, stopped playing golf, which was once his passion. "One of his best friends told me that my job is now to keep him calm and keep him from dying at the age of 35. It’s not what I signed up for." Til wealth do us part!
UPDATE: Aaaaand now they have a book deal, at least according to Fashionista. And if the publisher's smart, there'll be a vomit bag in every copy.
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ugh... these women are setting back women by like 20 years. how about they get a life and their own careers and their own GASP! identity.
Sequel to "He's Just Not That Into You": "He's Pretending To Be Out Of Work Due To The Recession, But He's Actually Just Not That Into You."
As a woman, I am ashamed. But I was never like these ho's, never!
I am Jack's complete lack of surprise.
zodak FTW
+1 point for you zodak
Their relationships are based more on their love of money than with each other.
These girls are feeling threatened that some guy named Obama is the one trying to stimulate their boyfriends' package now.
I think these girls are super.
ROTFLMAO!
someone needs to buy you a drink for making such a funny comment!
these dinner whores will be working it out at olive garden with the local plumber next month.
Hey plumbers make decent amount of money, have job security, and have a union to protect them! They might not so bad to these emotionally vacant girls.
Women like that make me think that maybe, just maybe, the Taliban weren't such bad guys after all.
Peter
See you next Tuesday, sweetie.
I smell a TARP bailout.
I'm speechless.
Women's lib in a nutshell.
Complain like hell about sexism when you don't get ahead on your own merits while still having the option of using men as your meal ticket when it suits you.
I'm not sure you actually understand the idea behind Women's Liberation.
@ Ides of March
Where did you see anyone mention feminism? These women are pretty honest, and not hypocritical, which makes them okay with me, even though I'd never live like them or date them if I were a man.
What do you care what their motivations are? It seems to me only the superficial men who wish they could date women like this are bitter about their attitude, and would be talking out the other side of their mouths if they could date them.
As for the women, I don't see what the big difference is in criteria. We all have criteria. I won't date drunks, philosophers, junkees, or anyone who lives too far away. My boyfriend is not rich, he's pretty good looking, he's old, and I like hanging around with him. So, are you gonna call me superficial for favoring him just because he's what I want from a man, or am I a nice person for dating someone down to earth? We all want what we want.
Just because they're not your cup of tea, doesn't mean they're "hos". Also, someone has to date those a-hole bankers. I certainly wouldn't ever date a banker. I'm allergic to idiots with too much money.
All the young ones got pink-slipped but there's still hope for these aspiring Witches of Greenwich: there are plenty of rangy, gangly 70yr. old CFOs out there and they need more loving than ever.(as well as more manual "help" down there)
while its true these women sound lame, the truth is everyone picks relationships for what they can out of it.
is it better to be with someone for thier looks rather than thier money?
Because looks and money are the only two aspects that make up a person?
Fine, is it any better to be with someone so long as they constantly entertain you?
Outside of your parents, 'love', like most things` is all quid pro quo...
You must be one of these women, or aspire to be like them.
Is rich person pain any less than poor person pain?
I can't help but think someone pulled a fast one on the Times.
I would like to think that too, but sadly, this type of over the top, crazy-ass materialism definitely does exist here.
I think it's a tie between Jen Chung and Felix Hoenikker for funniest comment so far.
Too bad they've never dated Patrick Bateman.
brilliant.
"Gold-diggers", doesn't that apply to ALL American war criminal woman?
"AND, FYI DABA girls - chopping vegetables along side your man in a hot New York sized kitchen is NOTHING like the sexy kitchen scene between Mickey Rourke and Kim Basinger in Nine and a Half Weeks. Seriously. It sucks."
I love cooking with my husband.
Ah yes, that tragic moment when HE realizes she's just with him for the money, and SHE realizes he's just with her for the sex.
They should do a "Two A-holes" Saturday Night Live sketch about this...
Amazingly, I sympathize more for these girls than the "alpha male" dicks they're dating.
Yes gentlemen, that's what you get for ruining the economy—even leggy, shallow, coked-up strumpets become more likable than you.
♥♥♥ = "he is just a math-club nerd"
DABA girls? I think the correct term in English language is: whores.
Although, calling this scum hookers is an insult to honest hookers who don't go around calling themselves "classy" and thinking they are above other girls.
I think this speaks less poorly about women in general than it does about this class of people who infest our city.
The bottom line is that these two groups deserve each other: The "alpha male" assholes who tanked our economy and the shallow little girls who spread their legs for them.
"Illness, pollution, should be encouraged and let loose
Then maybe some would have a genuine grouse"
Mark E. Smith
This is very disturbing. Without a surplus of shallow, jerk-off bankers to buy the attention of these girls, they may try to "pass" as normal women.
In ten years they will be washed up whores.
This is SATIRE, a la The Leveraged Sell-Out
Yeah i figured as much. :D
Go get 'em.
http://dabagirls.com/
Die Vacant Whores!
Wow, times are tough! Even the Times has resorted to outsourcing writing assignments -- to The Onion!
My prediction? People will stop caring about this sometime around Saturday afternoon (if they haven't already done so already). It's stupid satire that gets tired FAST. The publishers are complete morons for offering these people a book deal-- THEY should be the ones losing their jobs!
do they make spanx for dignity?
The gentleman is seated next to an attractive and proper young lady and engages her in conversation. Suddenly he says, "Would you sleep with me for a million dollars?" The lady blushes, but seeing the humor in the request, agrees. "Well, would you sleep with me for five dollars?"
"Certainly not!" she says, now offended. "Just what kind of woman do you think I am?"
"Madam, we've already established what you are. Now we're just haggling over the price."
Totally NYC epic: The downfall of the NYC WHORES as consequence of the downfall of the NYC JERKY BANKERS; both being New yorkers per excellence.
File them under "pathetic and depressing" next to people too broke to date. If cooking dinner with someone you've been dating steadily is a big downer for you ... I don't even know what to say. It is so easy to forget that there is a whole world of people out there who are completely lost without cash money. They all kind of suck.
Hold up. I finally read their blog.
Am I the only one who noticed that this is a joke? It is straight from the Onion. They're kidding. Or vying for a book deal. Or both.
TEAR!
uggg...
+1 point for you zodak
Those women are pigs.
I cannot believe that Ms. Petrus was dumb enough to reveal her identity. I would think a New York lawyer at a prominent New York firm would have better morals. Shame on you Ms. Petrus. To make matters worse, your not remotely attractive. No wonder that guy dumped you. You are a modern day, high priced callgirl! Shame on you! I can only imagine the embarrasment your firm must feel. I will surely never use your firm because it says a lot about the place. Anyone who employs you is not worth a dime! If you worked for me, I would fire you!
I am surprised that most of you believe this is true. Hilarity.
Really; these girls are such wusses. Yes; I know you can't stereotype by nationality, but really, these US WAGS just don't compare well to their UK counterparts who are made of far sterner stuff.
http://chelsea-sw3-girl.blogspot.com/2009/02/city-wags-vs-wall-st-wags.html
hahahahahah, this cant be real though.
nice blog i discovered thought i should share
http://theyounganddisenchanted.wordpress.com/