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A reader sent us the above photo today, saying "a friend snapped this on the new E train this morning, and no one can figure out what it means. do you guys know?" We asked the MTA and they told us: "A quick check says this is not an icon we use. Looks like the sign was vandalized. And I won’t even hazard a guess as to what it is meant to represent." So what do you guys think this vandal is trying to get fellow straphangers to stop doing?
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No plugging the computer chip in the back of your neck into anything on the train?
No talking to yourself or invisible partners too loud?
it means "Please, no visualizing flow charts or org charts"
or "No presenting"
No self-critical awareness or introspection.
No putting the base of your newborn's baby crib mobile that you just bought at babies r' us in your mouth and then pointing at it as if to say, "look what I'm doing!". Keep it in the box and wait until you get home.
If you turn the icon on its side it reads "no ipods."
No theremin.
Winner.
agreed, winner.
Yes, agreed, but that's one complicated theremin. What's that third antenna for? Time travel? Does it come with a tinfoil hat?
No taking photos of other people sleeping you fucking weirdo
no snitchin'
No Auxiliary Percussion
NO READING THE SUBWAY MAP OR POINTING AT IT DURING TRANSIT. OBVIOUSLY.
No not having genetalia.
no shitting on people's faces
Don't lean your head against the monitor of the arcade version of Tron?
no thinking of your next sculpture project because you are just wasting your time and money pursuing your self-indulgent artsy fartsy dreams at art school
NO READING THE SUBWAY MAP OR POINTING AT IT DURING TRANSIT. OBVIOUSLY.
aw that one is too boring
You are correct! Nothing pisses off more riders than having tourists crowd on top of you while they try to read the map on the wall, except smelly winos, of course.
argh! thank you
No projectile vomiting.
No confusing signs.
Please No Projecting Your Geneology
no fantasizing about eating human flesh and wearing a dress made out of skin.
please, no attempting to lick yours or others' armpit.
no using omega beams to vanquish your enemies.
Yeah, something along Omega beams, but I was thinking it's like "Don't beam into a mirror and then hit yourself."
Well, someone should have told Batman that last week.
no bad/misleading directions.
Looks to me like it means No plugging in to iPod, Game Boy, etc. Basically just pay attention to your surroundings.
No three-headed ceti eels.
(KHHHHAAAAAAAANNNN!)
obviously it is referring to this incident
No inflatable priced Metro-Cards !!! Get your Shit together Transit Authority!!!
No Nazi's?
Correction: CYBORG Nazis
No getting tortured on Cloud City.
(They won't even ask you any questions)
No SubwayNow ads.
No trash talk
No Powerpoint presentations.
I took that photo.
The stickers were throughout the car and did not looked super legit. Having made a few I know what unofficial signs look like - http://www.instructables.com/id/Look-Like-Your-Enemy-Create-signs-that-confuse-a/
I'm calling the MTA out on their B.S.
agh, I meant "The stickers were throughout the car and looked super legit." Anyway... you know what I mean.
but its totally the no littering sign with extra lines.
http://www.bridgeandtunnelclub.com/bigmap/citywide/subway/signs/index.htm
(scroll down)
MYSTERY SOLVED! Except, why the lines? but close enough. I can sleep again...
using telepathy to steal passengers' wallets is prohibited.
Best Interpretation Yet Zodak!!! Kuuudosss !!!!
i like this one
This may very well be (**serious suggestion**): No leaning on the doors?
No extra long nose hairs with coagulated boogers on em...
A stricter interpretation would be:
No extra long nose hairs with split-ends and coagulated boogers on em...
No extra long nose hairs with coagulated boogers on em...
A stricter interpretation would be:
No extra long nose hairs with split-ends and coagulated boogers on em...
Isn't it "No Littering"
No biting the style of Mayor Mitchell Hundred.
Do not put metal in the Time Travel chamber with the bunny rabbit or the island will move.
www.forgotten-ny.com
No sending out three-pronged laser beams from your eyes.
do not judge or compartmentalize fellow passengers. or at least not out loud. they're just trying to get where they're going, why you gonna be a hater?
No talkin geometry.
No using telekinesis to kill your self with Rubik's cubes.
No hitchhiking across the galaxy.
No boobs on an etch-a-sketch
this isn't news, kids. This is just a reminder.
By the by,
Reminded me of this: Please... No Windstorming.
Which was a sticker I saw on the F train in like 1996. I found a pic of it here
No thinking about littering.
What goes around, comes around.
no six sigma
No Spitting. And no littering. And don't even think about that idea of making spitballs, wiseass.
It means;
"NO CONNECTING ELECTRICAL WIRES TO INNOCENT PEOPLE THEN PUTTING A HOOD OVER THEIR HEADS AND FORCING THEM TO MASTURBATE STANDING ON A BOX WHILE YOU SICK AMERICAN F*CKS TAKE PICTURES TO SEND BACK HOME TO YOUR SIGNIFICANT OTHER"
Hmmm, I thought they weren't coming out with these signs til next year..
No kite flying
No microchip implanting.
No using your left hand to point to all the discrepancies in the proposed fare hike financial planning flow chart.
It's definitely the no littering sign, with extra lines. It's a mistake! someone messed up at the printer. That's why they look so legit. Because nobody checked before printing a zillion of them!
Ha! Some lazy ass is gonna get fired.
It's "Don't Even THINK of Littering."
Hey, on that subject (of bad printers), has anyone noticed on the N, R line at least, that the "do not lean on the doors" sign has mismatched fonts on it? I just saw that yesterday, on my way to 49th street station.
Photos please!
yes! I saw that last night on the Q train. All the 'o's where sideways* and one of the 'a's was bigger than the rest, it was insanely strange.
*I'm a graphic designer, I know when an o is sideways.
I think it is "no spitting"...I saw this on an E train home tonight, and walked through to a second car and saw the same signs there, in the same spots--pretty sure these are legit MTA-issued signs. The old E trains have signs that read "No smoking, no spitting, no radio playing," so it makes sense to offer a visual representation of those rules. However, this graphic could use some work!
No vomiting on self.
No nucleotide abstractions
No being the fourth Residence Inn in a six block area.
No mental hopscotch.
No reinsertion into the Matrix.
my wife got it... No Brainiac
GO SUPERMAN!
No preaching triangles and squares.
I know, it really bugged me too. So much that I had to take a picture. Here you go: DoNotLeanOnDoor.jpg
Oops, see below Comment Below
No quadrilaterals.
There's a more glaring error: the typeface isn't Helvetica Bold, the MTA standard. Helvetica Regular has a slight serif whose downward stroke of the "a" ends as a stroke to the right. The "[Pl]ease" shows the 'bad' "a."
No Calder Kinetic Sculptures
Duh.
No "evil eye" to your reflected image in the subway window/door.
No being the second branch of the Madoff Family.
The warning seems clear: "Do not gamble against the closing doors. The dice will ricochet in a perfectly perpendicular trajectory and embed themselves into your person."