Tourists Get Blogged Hard With a Vengeance

Maybe one blogger can make a difference? Beer enthusiast Aaron Goldfarb has had it with tourists who dare invade our fair city with their money and slow walking. So he's sending a misanthropic message to the world with his NYC tourist blog that these shabbily dressed visitors must be stopped. Or at least mocked. Goldfarb spends his days documenting every Midtown tourist step, profiling them by their tapered jeans or cowboy hats, and snidely imagining their insipid chatter. Also on notice is anyone who eats pancakes or looks at department store holiday windows! His tagline: "Give me your tired, your poor, your disgustingly fat retarded sloths that get in my fucking way every time I try to negotiate midtown." But could it be Goldfarb (pictured here looking touristy with our 43rd president) doth protest too much, and secretly loathes the tourist within?

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By John Del Signore in Arts & Entertainment on December 3, 2008 2:12 PM

Comments [rss]

rdsizzle

#53 "too many euro trash tourists"

Just imagine what you look like to them when you visit Europe....

Buck Owens

Aaron Goldfarb is a sub generic writer and point & shoot jpeg technician. (He will never merit the title 'Photographer"). Aaron is self-loathing tourist who decided to stay and mock other people like himself.

In the final analysis, I patiently await the day when I make mocking comments about how Aaron gets hit by a taxi driven by foreigners he secretly detests while clutching a Canon Digital Elph 1000 in his fat football watching fingers with images of people who look like his relatives. Thus, putting an end to a nonentity who should have stayed in Oklahoma. His eventual obituary will be the best thing ever written about him when it appears in The Gothamist.

KiljoyWasHere

I'm with Anton. The anger in the comments on this post is AMAZING.

Brooklynbobby

New York City is one of the biggest tourist draws in the world. Are they annoying? Yes!!! Do they spend a lot of money here? Yes!!! Get over it!!!

FelixtheCat & Christine Quinn'

too many euro trash tourists and worse tourists from India and Pakistan. blah

rosweed

What's a blog? What's a snark? Why should I care?

NannyState

Some tourists have it coming like the furniture magnate from Indianapolis that tries to look chic. But the answer my friends is to suavely suggest nice things for them and if they get it, eureka! And if they don't, then you just move on. And "crowds of slow moving people in Midtown"? How many of them are NYers that broke their stride for some reason? Shit happens and you can't blame it all on tourists.

JohnnyBates

Baffling? Maybe. Fast-paced? Yeah. But I can think of a few cities that are drab, and New York ain't one.

rfid4dna

Hey why make fun of the fine and decent people that bring cash here? Honestly, it takes brass for some of these folks to visit this baffling, fast-past, often-drab metropolis. I've never been to Lahore, but nobody there would expect me to look and act like a native.

breaknight

Rabid, irrational tourist hatred is classic behavior for newbies to the city. It is ALL about self loathing.

I'm a transplant (from DC-another tourist heavy city), and I have notice that the most tolerant people when it comes to tourists are the native New Yorkers I know...

allie25

nothing worse than a bro who thinks he is funny

Nyctini11

YAY!!!!! I holler at them all the time too! F'ing tourists, i moved back to brooklyn to get away!

JohnnyBates

Funny how his Twitter stream is protected, yet the updates are echoed publicly on his blog. His latest round of updates reveals that anyone who drinks white russians is a tool. Perhaps he's just upset over not being able to grasp The Big Lebowski.

Gwinny

Haha... now he's being all pissy on the blog about being called out by Gothamist.

There are so many things that make him a tool:

- mocking people's looks

- getting photo taken with Dubya

- pointing fingers at tourists when he himself is from elsewhere

- oh, and let's not forget the charming story on his regular blog about the "boring" doctor who fondled his balls in the bathroom. you've GOT to be kidding me.

remember folks, he wants the hits. let's not humor him, m'kay?

JohnnyBates

henricus: Sorry to hear you couldn't hang. Enjoy the south.

dimes

Aaron Goldfarb == tool

nuff said

henricus

*rolls eyes* what a joke. I can't think of the last time a tourist has annoyed me, but I can tell you of at least five obvious residents who annoy me greatly. I think this blog must be a joke, but I tend to get a good laugh at the way 'real new yorkers' dress. I've been living here for almost seven years and refuse to wear tight jeans and sun glasses...trendy dress is for the poor brainless people who need to define who's in and out by their clothing.

New Yorkers aren't fat? Come to my street in Harlem, it looks like the elephant parade at the circus.

I've come to realize that New York is often charming in spite of the people. The architecture can be lovely. There are great restaurants. Sure, you meet a few nice people occasionally, but more and more I am simply shocked at how self-absorbed residents of this city are. There is so little civic pride in this city it's amazing...

I'm sure someone is going to say 'go back to Oklahoma!' Well, I am. I'm returning to the small town life of North Carolina in two weeks after my seven year stint here. I started out enchanted with the city but have quickly become disenchanted with the smells, self-importance, and general malaise that seems to hang over the people here.

Maybe it's just me...but everyone seems miserable. Trudging everywhere with scowls on their faces and buds in their ears.

So, unfortunately, New York is no longer the place for this little nerd who loves to read and drink coffee. Welcome to the New York of the future...population fashionistas.

Anton Azucar

Uh, I don't have a twitter. Thanks though. And contrary to what it seems to be, unfortunately for all still here, I am not this Goldfarb character. I have been to Oklahoma City, however. Downtown is nice. Anyways, this comment section is fun!

zodak

Anton Azucar protected his twitter updates & made his lamebook profile private.

i guess someone hurt his feelings.

go back to oklahoma city & play beer pong with dubya.