July 23, 2008
Sunscreen Now Allowed in Yankee Stadium!
After routinely stopping ticket holders from bringing their sunblock into Yankee Stadium, the sunburnt fans’ outrage boiled over yesterday into the New York Post, who verified that security guards have been forcing people to throw away any sunscreen containers larger than three ounces. Of course, fans always had the option of buying 1-ounce bottles of Arizona Sun SPF 15 for $5 inside the stadium. But an hour after a reporter called the stadium to confirm the sunscreen ban, a spokesman announced a change in policy: sunscreen is now allowed! Now if only the Post would publicize their absurd bicycle helmet ban – after all, the stadium isn’t selling those inside, as far as we know.
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Yes, because you just never know when terrorists will target a bunch of drunken sports fans with liquid explosives. Or worse, they might hijack the stadium!
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Why was this ban in effect in the first place? Liquid Explosives? I mean, a) it's not a plane so you can't bring it down and b) has any liquid explosive been used successfully or unsuccessfully yet? No.
One day, we'll catch a wiretap about some goofball trying to use "clothes shaped explosives". We will all be changing into scrubs to fly and watch baseball! Weeee!
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From their security guidelines:
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I love how their guidelines assume everyone drives a personal vehicle to Yankee stadium meanwhile they're located right next to the 4 train. This is the kind of screwy mindset that will make the Nets stadium a royal mess.
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this whole security issue is a fucking joke! if anyone wants to explode a bomb they will do it. remember, terrorists use tactics to kill as many people as possible with one attack. for the amount of people crammed outside the stadium at any given time before or after the game a terrorist would be able to maximize his attack outside of the "security" area...
look at Palestinian/Israeli attacks for reference.
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even the 3oz rule on planes is arbitrary and just plain ludicrous. If 4 oz of shampoo can explode, chances are 3oz will too.
And I have never heard of plastic sandwich bags having some sort of bomb thwarting properties yet we must put our items in quart sized bags. Who the hell comes up with this stuff! Someone with relatives that work at Ziplock, obviously.
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It's obvious they want you to buy the overprice goods and food from the stadium and not bring in stuff from outside, which is 100X times cheaper.
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I don't understand this stupid rule. Especially when you are allowed to bring in non-alcoholic beverages, as long as they are sealed. The last 5 times I've gone to Yankee stadium, I usually bring in a sealed bottle of water and a sealed soda.
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They're going to blow the place up anyway, right?
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I go to at least 15 Yankee games per season and conclude that the security measures are arbitrary, irregularly enforced and are designed only to give the illusion of safety. As others have pointed out above, a terrorist bent on causing maximum damage at a sports venue will not do so with a bottle of sunscreen. Most of the security guards are uneducated and helpless. Why do they ask to see the face of a cellphone? I just keep mine in my pocket and tell the guard that I am not carrying a cellphone.
And while we're at it, can we do away with "God Bless America?" I can be a patriot without invoking god and without singing a song while standing at attention.
Oh, and what about YMCA? That routine is lame.
Oh, and what about Cotton-Eye Joe? That's a Reconstruction-era racist song. It uses a derogatory term in referring to an older black man with cataracts. No better than the N word, in my opinion.
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Agreed famdoc. And while your at it, tell them to ditch that Heyy Baby (Uh Ah!) song. That alone will help do away with my homicidal urge to kill.
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I'd like to hear what Baby Hitler has to say on the subject.
Seriously though, if you want to sneak a bomb into Yankee Stadium, all you have to do is have your girlfriend, sister or wife conceal it in her purse. I know a guy who does exactly this (sans bomb, of course), because he goes to games straight from work, and the asshat security guards won't let him bring his messenger bag in. But slung over his wife's shoulder? No problem!
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Also, your link to the Post story is wrong.
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It's obvious they want you to buy the overprice goods and food from the stadium and not bring in stuff from outside, which is 100X times cheaper.
You can bring sandwiches, peanuts, sunflowers seeds sealed soda and sealed water as long as it's in a clear bag...
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as i said earlier, these security policies are a joke!
i worked on the field at yankee stadium for the all star game last week and the security for "employees" was/is a friggin joke. the police never searched me for anything. My bag or pockets were never searched or sniffed by any dog.
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zoofroy: yeah, you're right about the rules not applying for women. with an increasing number of suicidal bombers in the middle east being women, you'd think Steinbrenner and sons would wisen up and prevent women from bringing their knock-off Coach bags into the stadium.
oh, and "enter sandman" must we?
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We're all missing the larger point: don't go to Yankee Stadium under any circumstances. The security guards at Shea don't care what you bring in. I brought a backpack with a laptop to a game last summer and they just thought it was funny. And they pointed out that I wouldn't have gotten the same bag into Yankee Stadium.
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I'm surprised nobody has touched on the differences between yankee and shea. I go to a handful of mets games and have never had any trouble getting my messenger bag in so long as I'm willing to let them look inside it. I would be pretty irate if I showed up at yankee stadium and they said I couldn't bring it in, but they were letting in women with purses.
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This is because the Yankees & their fans are pompous elitist bigheaded frontrunners who think that the world revolves around the Yankees. Of COURSE the terrorists would go after Yankee Stadium instead of Shea because... 26 Time World Champions!
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Hate to say it, but the Yankees are not overcharging.
I just bought from Duane Reade a 3-oz bottle of 85SPF for $13. So, $5 an ounce is within reason.
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[2] has any liquid explosive been used successfully or unsuccessfully yet? No.
I trust you're referring to terrorist attacks. If you are, then no. But if you aren't, one word: nitroglycerin. Not that hard to make, although the homemade stuff is dangerously unstable and more likely to blow up the maker.
One day, we'll catch a wiretap about some goofball trying to use "clothes shaped explosives". We will all be changing into scrubs to fly and watch baseball! Weeee!
One word: nitrocellulose.
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#1 wins the thread!