Could an Anti-Groping Campaign Increase Unseemly Underground Behavior?

cant we all just be nudists

I've decided I'm not buying the "ads will make it worse" line of thought. But, these ads *are* kind of stupid. Here's how you do it -

No photos, no dumb slogans. Fuck all that shit. Model it after the little badges that say assaulting a transit worker is a felony. Just put the information out there -

- that unwanted sexual contact is a crime, and what the penalty is

- what a person should do if they experience or witness this

- why the perp should worry about getting caught. (reference that brief undercover police program.)

These comments have me so angry I could scream. There is a HUGE difference between being squeezed up against people in a crowded subway, which one rightfully expects in a large city, and being SEXUALLY ASSAULTED by a fellow subway rider who feels the need to rub his penis against your back. As a young woman, I don't have a problem with being on a crowded train. I do have a problem with men who take advantage of the situation to get off. And this is more than a violation of personal space - this is a CRIME, this is SEXUAL ASSAULT, and no woman should have to put up with it.

I have had a man rub his penis against me on the T (boston subway - thank god they're finally doing something about it) and it was the worst, most violating experience I ever had on public transportation (and I even saw someone get shot right in front of me on the T).

I can't believe the responses of the men to this column. You have a hard time not staring at my breasts because I have the audacity to wear something more form fitting than a potato sack? Go to hell. When you're standing in front of me as I sit with your crotch right in my face, I don't stare or attempt to grab it, I just read my book and try to ignore it. How hard is that?

hoodlum, try reading everything... no one is going to report you if you touch someone by accident. Jesus. Use your head.

OH GOD SOMEONE TOUCHED ME A VIOLATED MY PERSONAL SPACE. Boo fucking hoo. It's crouded and you will come in contact with people sometimes. Unless someone physically sticks there hand out and grabs you I don't see any problem.

The wording of Boston's ad is awkward (the "take my picture" one at least plays on a logical theme) and its intended audience is vague (maybe deliberately so; any effort to at least keep up the pretense of being gender neutral at the risk of becoming entirely benign) but I think it's meant to advertise to victims, not perpetrators of sexual harassment. Of *course* reported incidents went up in Boston after that campaign. Even if it planted the idea to grope in a few whack-o's heads, it probably planted the idea to report in twice as many victims' heads.

I've been aggressively, physically harassed twice in 10 or 12 years and it didn't even occur to me to report the CRIME until I got home after the second time. At that point, it was too late to send anyone directly after the guy, but I reported the incident and was asked to look at photos and was able to identify him because another woman had reported the same harassment. The only way he was caught was because we BOTH came forward, another reason why it's important to encourage reporting.

My experience (and stories like EricRoberts') makes me appreciate the NYPD where I once might have disparaged or taken them for granted.

I seriously don't know that an ad campaign will help. I've seen two guys whip it out on the subway. Pervs abound.

whoops. didn't notice it said that in the article. my bad.

that ad is from boston.

Cool, I will just trust in the good sound judgment of millions of neurotic strangers in NYC that I won't be labeled a sex offender for the rest of my life. I don't see what everyone is so uptight about.

"I'm not saying I condone inappropriate behavior or staring, but I find it funny that some women dress like they're on the beach riding the subway and are shocked, SHOCKED to find sketchy men staring at them. Cover up a bit ladies."

There's a difference between looking at cleavage and grabbing a girl's ass, or sliding a hand under a skirt, or yanking it out on the train or bus to jack it while staring at the girl.

You know this. Come on.

And ladies are not into perceiving every touch, every look as a threat. There is a difference between innocent and not. We know it. And you know it.

when guys get groped it's usually a pickpocket attempt. generally, crowded trains just plain suck.

#10 Right!

Recently, there was an ad utilizing a chain gang, and even they were all white!

On TV ads regarding the criminal justice system, the blacks are only represented as sitting judges.

What's wrong with this picture?

@Egglantine, I'm sure you're right. I've heard from a woman who was groped who didn't know what to do (and I'm sure there are many others who don't talk about it). Sometimes the guy does it in such a way that leaves some room for a woman to doubt his intent.

A couple years ago, I saw some teenage girls get a groper busted on the F train. Some cops were walking between cars and the officer absolutely slammed the guy against the doors to apprehend him. Then when we pulled into Smith and 9th street, the cop moved him bodily onto the platform and the accusers followed.

@HowBoutDemCowboys, did you find the boob brush to be offensive or threatening? Personally, I wouldn't be bothered too much. I assume most women want to touch me about as much as I want to touch 99% of the subway riders.

Note to all women: When I'm on the train squished against you, Its a little hard to not glance at your tits when 1) They're huge 2) You insist on wearing a V Neck or anything else so relieving that it would be impossible NOT to look.

I'm not saying I condone inappropriate behavior or staring, but I find it funny that some women dress like they're on the beach riding the subway and are shocked, SHOCKED to find sketchy men staring at them. Cover up a bit ladies.

JacqueMehoff, I feel your pain. There are lots of presumptuous women out there who believe that guys are out to grope them because of their 'goods', feel a slight brush, and are convinced that you are up to no good. No miss I did not touch you, and would not want to touch you if you were the last woman on earth.

The comments by some of the men posted here is exactly why there is a need for such a campaign. Agreed that the picture or the ad itself may not be the most effective. However, the amount of times that a man insists on touching my leg with his when there's plenty of space for him to move over to the other side, or the other times when I could feel a man's gross hot breath on my neck from behind is too sick to count without hurling.

Question for the men - If every time you get on the subway you're in danger of having your behind squeezed or having your packages fondled, you may feel differently.

What about the guy who gets a woman pressed against him in a packed bus or train and tries his best to think of baseball statistics but can't keep things um, down? Should he rub his butt on someone to avoid contact? Can he put his hands in front of him and be accused of groping? Should he just avoid mass transit during rush hour?

I am happy to report that I have only been groped once on the subway in the six years I've lived in NYC. At the time I was so shocked and angry and ashamed that it never occurred to me to inform the police. Like most women, I never thought about what I would do until it happened to me. An ad in the subway would have helpful.

For the number of men who are mistakenly accused of sexual harrassment, I'll bet there are far more women out there who remain silent.

I saw a middle aged guy gazing/staring practically on top of a young girl riding up the escalator at Grand Central Terminal. it was like tractor beams were set on her. (gotta keep the perv theme going)

I was behind her and her butt in my face and I turned my head for fear of being called a perv. I thought that two step distance would be adequate. but it wasn't.

plk779, I think I've seen that porno. Good stuff!

Seriously though, why is it always the guy who is the perp? I've had numerous occassions where there was plenty of room to go around me and a woman inappropriately gave me the 'boob brush'; once while my girlfriend was with me. I know men are usually the problem here, but both kinds of 'rubbing' should be addressed.

All of that being said, I would like to commend Jen Carlson for keeping the article gender-neutral.

@slappy, define inappropriate gazing so I know what to watch out for.

I sure hope you girls can tell the difference.

My knuckles (back of my hand) brushed against an old butt once and she called me a perv, well not with her mouth but her eyes. this wasn't in the subway but at an outdoor show and she backed into ME by dancing in a small confined space.

Why did they make the guy white? Why are all the criminals white? what's the deal?

The slogan on the sign sounds like she's broking a deal...

80

The guy in the picture isn't graphically doing anything "wrong" but it's illustrating the situation all people have to put up with on the subway where people are pressed up against each other, and you can tell if a touch is an accident or an on-purpose.

And of course some men are going to say "Well every time I touch a girl by accident I don't want to have to worry about being accused of rape." Don't worry. We can tell the difference and we won't hold it against all men. And if some girls decide to get all crazy and accuse every guy of something, let's not hold it against all women.

mmmkay?

How about a "keep your eyes to yourself" campaign to stop inappropriate gazing. That kind of behavior is wrong and it should not happen. But this ad campaign is ridiculous. What does it mean exactly? "Rub against me and I will open your fly?"

Succinctly stated, plk779.

"Well, no one wants to actually see a graphic representation of a guy rubbing his cock against a girl's ass on the subway."

speak for yourself!

(i keed, i keed)

That ad is terrible. It has a dirty, sexy connotation that seems to encourage the rubbing. I'd appreciate something more like "Rub against me and I'll rip your balls off."

Well, no one wants to actually see a graphic representation of a guy rubbing his cock against a girl's ass on the subway.

I agree with Phineas. Who is to say that the girl isn't rubbing her breasts on him?

There is no reasonable expectation of personal space on the subway at peak travel times. Not even a little bit. I don't even see what the guy in the picture is doing wrong. Which makes the ad confusing and takes the focus away from actual perverts.