The Relentless Reign of Rachael Ray

Guys, it’s Rachael Ray’s world, we just eat in it – this was verified by Time Magazine when the Food Network host was declared one of the 100 people who “shape our world” last year. And now that world will continue turning for at least two more years; it was announced yesterday that Ray’s contract has been extended beyond the Bush administration.

That means at least 120 more episodes of her daytime cooking show, 30 Minute Meals, as well as the premiere of a new show, Rachael’s Vacation that – mark your calendars, guys! – begins airing January 12 at 9pm. The series will follow the militantly perky star as she “discovers the distant cities, countries, foods, and lifestyles that continue to amaze and excite her. Viewers will experience the hip, fun, and funky places she loves,” like “shoe stores, street fairs and bookstores.” So basically it’s Rachael Ray on $400 day.

Whether you love her for her approachable, folksy recipes or loathe her for her cutesy attitude and her déclassé cooking, it’s time to face facts: Ray is here to stay. She is an unstoppable, multi-platform media phenomenon. Ray will bury us all, in a pauper’s grave costing less than $40, with a ceremony finished in under 30 minutes. Food at the wake will consist of delish Chicken Curry in a Hurry and yummo Iceberg Lettuce Chopped Salad with “French Dressing”. (Yes, there is actually a recipe for that.)

Contact the author of this article or email tips@gothamist.com with further questions, comments or tips.

By John Del Signore in Food on December 18, 2007 9:54 AM

Comments [rss]

virgil

"I'd like to taste her vagaga. (is that what we're calling it these days?)"

No.

zodak

what a great picture, she is so cute. she has a geat butt & i would love to defile her in every way.

I tasted her vagaga, it was YUMM-O!

I'd like to taste her vagaga. (is that what we're calling it these days?)

schadenfreudian mensch

Man, I would take Giada De Laurentiis over RR any day of the week.

msk

Hatorade, anyone? I really don't get why people have such intense reactions against her. No one forces you to watch the Food Network. She's just a cute, peppy, successful woman. Your time could be much better spent hating Paris Hilton, or someone else with no skills, motivation, or underpants. Or, you know, doing something productive to make yourself happy... hatred is a weird hobby, but if you enjoy it, go for it, I guess...

Loopus

She has to be one of the loudest fkrs on tv...my ears are ringing when she's on...whats that? TV remote volume button...oh yeah...good idea...

And the shows where that dooshbag husband dude is on with her makes it double vomit inducing...

Reality Czech

I hate those Dunkin' Donuts commercials! Especially when she says, "Delish" Fug that word.

babyhitler

as a person who thought RR was cute, HDTV has killed all those fantasies. Damn, HD makes her look like my lunch lady in public school. Shame on you, television magic and your soft filters.

bentb

Has she now infected Gothamist? I feel unclean...http://community.livejournal.com/rach...

sandradayoconnor

I lived in Portland, OR for a while and she blew through town with her show while I was living there. For weeks afterwards the only thing anyone could talk about was how she went to fairly expensive restaurants with her entire entourage and got irate when the places refused to comp 10+ people for the full meal. She repeatedly got completely shitfaced and never left more than a 5-10% tip.

JenChungsBaby

I never had a problem with her until I saw those latest Dunkin Donuts commercials. AAArrrghghghgh!

Wasn't her husband arrested last year for hiring a prostitute to spit on him? Strange fetish.

freddyhere

Slapped with what...

JRod5417

That's a face begging to be slapped if I ever saw one.

aydiosmio

Rachel Ray is like an irritating little sister.

Just.. JUST GO AWAY. Gah!

I'd like to see Rachel Ray go headfirst into a fryer on Alton Brown's turkey derrick.

Roger McDowell

I tasted her vagaga, it was YUMM-O!

chuzzlewit

I been working at it for like 5 minutes now and I cannot come up with any sexual feelings towards Rachel Ray. Zero.

Dude69

I luv RR! I find most of the chefs on FN condescending, so it's refreshing to have an average everyday cook catering to the needs of the average American. Al Roker is even worst in my opinion in terms of perkiness.