The Nanny Spy-aries

Nannies tattling on the foibles of their well-to-do employers are very last year. The Internet has spawned a forum that makes hidden cameras and GPS tracking seem like child's play when monitoring the people monitoring one's children.

ISawYourNanny is a site where people can post incidents that they found suspect, and some of the descriptions of the people and places are meant to be specific enough that parents can figure out if it's their child or nanny that's being talked about. Camera phone pictures often accompany the posts, but the site manager, who remains anonymous herself, blurs out recognizable faces. The majority of posts now originate from New York due to the high concentration of nannies in the city.

While the purpose of the site is to record and report incidences of child neglect or mistreatment, if not outright abuse by nannies, The New York Times reports that about half of the posts on ISawYourNanny are from childcare workers themselves, who complain about mistreatment by employers. There is, unsurprisingly, often social friction when employees are coming from different racial, cultural, and socio-economic backgrounds than their usually white affluent employers. But even in a post about a nanny who was neglecting a child at a bookstore, the comments quickly stray onto a debate among mothers themselves over the merits of staying at home to raise children versus continuing to work.

While a site devoted to informing on people may seem like a crass invasion of privacy, we talked to one nanny who had heard of ISawYourNanny and thought it was an excellent idea. She applauded the concept of being able to report poor nanny behavior: "The things i have seen over the last 6 years have been disgraceful and I wouldn't leave [my dog] with half the people working as caregivers in the city."

Earlier this year, city officials discussed allowing New Yorkers to send cell phone pictures to 911 and 311 to report criminal acts or quality of life infractions.

(black_nannies_white_babies, by potterbrain66 at flickr)

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By Dave Hogarty in News on October 15, 2007 2:24 PM

Comments [rss]

nanny02

Hi,

you seem to all have different views about the cam. I am a nanny, and soon to be a mother. I have always nannied, and I have met some people who are bad at it(who should be watched). I would personally want to know if someone was watching me, especially if it was a husband, and the baby was napping and I changed or something. I would be thinking I was in the privacy of a house. On the other hand, if I was informed ahead of time, I would at least be cautious of those sorts of things. I do think that is an invasion of privacy, and if you don't trust your nanny, find someone else! Interview better, watch her when you are there, does she have a sence of false-ness? Is she faking a smile? Can you do a day or 2 where you will be in and out of the house? And finally, just ask before you hire "would you be opposed to a cam" Her answer could tell you a lot...

Jen Chung

navinjohnson, point taken - I don't have kids, I don't know how the dynamic works - I just know that the prospect of looking for childcare is overwhelming. I wish there were better childcare options for everyone.

chuzzlewit

Firstly, I am the boss. Secondly, if YOUR boss tries to spy on me, I will kill them.

navinjohnson

To my #5:

When my nanny pays my salary and entrusts me with the safety of her kids, she's free to spy on me as much as she likes.

What you post makes no sense at all. Does everything need to be equitable? Do you have the same rights at your job as your boss?

chuzzlewit

Great - as long as the kids and nannies know they are free to log on to ISawYourMommyandDaddy.com occasionally to check up - the dead cat of ugly truth should be swung in all directions.

Mags

I have been a nanny and now, as a mom who stays home, I see a lot of nannies. Some are great. I have more than once stopped parents on the weekend and told them that I see their nanny during the week and she's doing an awesome job. (These comments seem to be appreciated.)

That said, I have seen some bad nannying too. But I would never have the nerve to tell that to a parent, unless it seemed life-threatening. Just the other day I saw a nanny slap the hand of a toddler who tried to take a piece of her lunch. She screamed, "Don't you touch my food!" As a parent, I couldn't imagine ever doing that to my child, or allowing anyone else to.

It's not bench sitting, or even gossiping with friends that seems wrong. It's the obvious disgust some nannies have with their charges. That's gotta affect a kid.

navinjohnson

all due respect but talk to me again after you have kids. i can only speak for myself but they've quickly become the most treasured thing in my life. i've read/heard from friends some pretty gruesome stories of neglect or downright mistreatment of kids by nannies (even those who have come highly recommended and whose references checked out) that i have no problem with an extra set of eyes on the playground.

and, with regard to your comment about parents and grandparents sitting on benches, it's relevant what they do because a) they're not being paid and b) there's just a different set of standards for what i'm allowed to do vs. what an employee is allowed to do.

Dave Hogarty

Yeah, criticizing nannies for congregating on benches and talking while kids play is absurd. That's what adults do when they take their or someone else's kids to playgrounds.

I would hope that if a parent is entrusting their child to someone's care, there's an implicit level of trust in the relationship with that person where a single report of an incident that could've been taken out of context would result in a dismissal.

Jen Chung

I think parents are definitely within their rights to want to know how their kids are being cared for. But using these kind of "reports" as a only gauge of what's happening (I've never nannied, but when I've baby-sat, there have been some moments where I've told them to stop acting like manicas) seems a bit rash, especially when deciding to fire someone.

And the complaints about nannies sitting on benches - I've seen parents and grandparents sitting on benches while kids are playing.