Bruni Gone Wild

So apparently we were the last ones to know that Frank Bruni is gay (see "Mrs. Bruni" comment last week). But as we know from his one-star review today, that didn't stop him from taking in the sights while dining at Robert's Steakhouse in the Penthouse Executive Club.

He and the others at his table might have been focusing primarily on the food, "[w]e were strangers to such pulchritudinous territory, less susceptible to the scenery than other men might be, more aroused by the side dishes than the sideshow," and "[o]n this visit to Robert’s and on subsequent ones, I was derelict in my duty, failing to sample much of what the restaurant had to offer." But for those who may be more interested in the strippers than Chef Adam Perry Lang's steaks, which he hailed as some of the best in the city, he did provide some eyecandy to go with his article.

The slideshow commentary makes it crystal clear that Frank is not generally your typical Robert's patron. For the first slide: "the women in these circular nooks high above the steakhouse stage seem to dance for no one, for everyone, for themselves: it's unclear what the precise philosophy here is." And for the one at right, "The portions at Robert's are pretty generous -- as they need to be, given how topless some of the prices seem."

We were waiting to see a slide of Bruni enjoying the "buttery nipple," a dessert that "involves one of the women straddling your lap, tilting your head back, pouring a combination of Baileys Irish Cream and butterscotch schnapps down your throat, and squirting Reddi-wip into your mouth." In the name of research, of course.