Pencil This In

VACATION: The Greater Fort Lauderdale visitors' bureau has brought the Sunshine State to NYC in the form of a 3,600-square foot virtual vacation. The space includes a palm tree-lined "beach", complimentary mini-massages and, of course, bikini clad models. Virtual fishing, golf and more, will make you forget the sudden drop in temperature.

Through 6pm // The Bank Building [20 Union Square East] // Free

READING: Nancy Reardon, who penned "On-Camera: How to Report, Anchor and Interview: A Report from the Trenches" will be at Barnes & Noble later teaching all of you aspiring journalists a thing or two. She also teaches on-camera skills at the New School. We bet these kids could have learned a little something from her.

7:30pm // Barnes & Noble [396 Sixth Ave] // Free

THEATER: Thomas Bradshaw's plays probably aren't for the easily-appalled subscriber set; his last piece told the story of a white lawyer on a mission from God to impose "The Gospel of Male Domination" over all females. (Step #1: Enchain and sodomize a black woman.) His new play, named Purity, is about a “refined and prominent African American English professor whose life is turned upside down when a new, 'more black' professor challenges his authenticity, his marriage to a white woman, and his entire way of life.” P.S. 122 warns (or boasts) that the play ends on a note of “shocking violence”; there’s also plenty of nudity and “sexual activity” along the way. The ubiquitous Martin Denton promises that “you won't see very many plays more viscerally provoking than Purity this year.” - John Del Signore

8:30pm // P.S. 122 [150 First Ave.] // Tickets cost $15.

MUSIC: Miss out getting tickets for the crazy Cold War Kids bicoastal residency that starts tonight? Have no fear, your ears will be pleased if you head over to Brooklyn for Dance Party! Free Blood (!!!), dj Armani XXXchange (Spankrock), Juiceboxxx, Dre Skull and Never Heard of Zeppelin will spin and play some tunes for you in the Brooklyn basement.

8pm // Micheline's [1124 Broadway @ Kosciuszko, Brooklyn] // $6