October 10, 2006
Worst. Meals. Ever.
We were fascinated by today's Salon article, "Bad Taste," in which prominent food writers chronicle their absolute worst meals ever. Jane and Michael Stern, Regina Schrambling, Steven Rinella, Julie Powell, Michael Ruhlman and Robert Sietsema all chime in with stories of "washcloth steak," "embryonic duckling boiled alive in its shell, one week before birth," (apparently a Filipino delicacy), and "mealy" skate with "low-tide nasty" lobster foam, prepared by Rocco DiSpirito.
After reading, we tried to conjure up a recollection of our worst meal. It's unclear if we have blocked it out due to the trauma or simply couldn't remember, but we couldn't come up with anything. And so we turn to you -- bring on your food horror stories. Was there a meal you had to choke down to appease your hosts? A dish that made you puke (or worse) for days afterwards? Or, like Julie Powell, a bit of food that causes more emotional disgust than physical? We'd love to hear all about it.
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Eating Raisin Brand as a child,pour tones of sugar on it cause it tasted funny, only to then realize there dozens of bugs in the bowl....
Should be easy for Gothamist - just recall your last trip to Shake Shack. You know, the overhyped unsanitary hole you people seem to frequent as much as possible.
I had a great meal at Bouley Bakery about 5 years ago only to have the worst gastrointestinal distress of my life less than 20 minutes after leaving the door. I made it to a Tribeca Grand downstairs bathroom with seconds to spare. Spent the better part of the evening there.
It is, I believe, a common experience to have eaten something, believed it to be quite good and minutes later have your intestinal tract tell you the opposite. Just recently, I ordered take-out lunch from my favorite downtown Japanese joint (Taste of Tokyo). Halfway through my vegetarian tempura, an overwhelming nausea developed, which lasted the best part of the afternoon. Had to have been something in one of those veggies.
The Minnow, in Park Slope, was one of our favorite places for well-prepared seafood.
Well, the owners decided the money was in booze and fast-food seafood and closed the main restaurant, expanding "Bar Minnow." On my only trip there, I encountered funky mussels. The staff gladly took away my dish and comped me my glass of wine. But, by then, my appetite had all but disappeared. Zillions of posts to chowhound.com confirm that my experience there was no fluke.
I got food poisioning on my birthday from wild mushroom risotto @ Cafe Centro in the MetLife Building--I ended up in the hospital and couldn't eat solid food aside from toast and bananas for over 2 weeks.
I've had the embryonic duck egg and it is indeed disgusting! I don't understand how people can eat half formed duckling head and organs, although the hardened placenta and duck egg white is really, really good. That part is awesome.
White Dog Cafe in Philadelphia. Bugs in the bread, unremarkable entree and horrible service.
I got food poisoning from mushroom risotto also.
Eating in a small diner in upstate NY, the place was overrun with Mayflies (they had the door open!) and they were landing everywhere, and all over my spaghetti. It grossed me out so I had them take it away and they didn't charge me.
Food poisoning at Taco Bell 5 years ago. I have never eaten there again. (I used to go once a week in high school + college) Was sick for about a week, called and complained and all they did was send me coupons, which luckly could be used a Pizza Hut.
Now for the Shake Shack, last year my girlfriend got sick there. She says cause it was hot that day, I say it was because of the Shite Shack.
I once had liver with some fava beans and a nice Chianti. It did not go down too nicely.
Is that a blue-cheese bagel in the pic or are you growing your own penicillin?.
Perch in Park Slope - UGH! I went there for brunch and ordered the Huevos Rancheros which I would not recommend. The eggs were like rubber and were completely conjealed when they reached the table. Don't ask me why, I ate and it as I was walking out, I became dizzy, broke out in a sweat and had to make a quick turn into the bathroom where I puked it all up. Sick before even leaving the restaurant!
We were in Galway, 15-20 years ago, and forgot that recommendations are a must there. Shivers to this day. Course after course of horrible food. Thankfully the name of the place has escaped me, but I think I'd recognize where I was and alarms would go off.
Baton Rouge restaurant. Who knew that honey fried chicken could be so disgusting?
My friend's catfish was equally as bad.
Tab Tos in the east village in May '06. Spicy tuna roll must have been made with rancid fish because I was violently ill, got an ulcer (from the bacteria) and needed weeks of antibiotics to fix it.
And to see all the hipster idiots outside when I walk by makes me more sick.
Chinese Buffet on Route 22 in Brewster NY. I went flying to the bathroom. I mean flying.... Geoff
Man, I don't know what half formed duckling head and organs you guys eat, but whenever I have half formed duckling head and organs, they are top-notch!
Knickerbocker restaurant off University, April 2001. Angel hair and (clearly bad) shrimp. Food poisoning I would not wish on my worst enemy or ex boyfriend. Ended up in the ER, crying and begging for mercy. They (bless them) knocked me out with a Benadryl drip so I could at least sleep it off a bit. *shudders at memory*
Rack of ribs from Park Slope Brweing Company (now Park Slope Ale House.) It was a late dinner, and my then boyfriend and I came home and went right to bed. I awoke to the sound of wretched puking, with only a second to think "eww" before I, myself, was also vomiting enough to clog the kitchen sink (no time to find a bucket.) The two of us spent the next 48 hours (literally) vomiting every ten minutes. We probably should have gone to the hospital but kept thinking it would pass. Once I had regained my strength enough to hold the phone to my ear, I called the restaurant, and the guy on the phone literally talked to me like I was completely retarded and basically told me to eff off. I then puked while on the phone with him.
My best guess is someone didn't wash his hands after some serious diahrrea.
At my vegetarian co-op in college, I was once served a raw food meal that involved "sun burgers"- lumps of lentils, carrots and other vegan treats that had been left outside, uncovered, for 24 hours to "cook in the warm love of the sun." Instead, it rained on them.
Yet still they were presented to 100 hungry college students for dinner.
My worst meals have both taken place in the vicinity between 112th - 120th between Columbus and Amsterdam... The first happened in a Mexican restaurant about 15 years ago. The food was good, but when I looked into my half-empty glass of water, there was a baby cockroach floating in my glass.
The second incident happened in an Ethiopian restuarant in the nabe recently. I'd never had Ethiopian food before, and would have enjoyed it, I think, if there had not been roaches crawling up the walls and on our table.
Needless to say, after twice encountering this probelm in the area, I avoid eating around there now, and I always look in my water glass before sipping.
Jason's Riverside Grill at Chelsea Piers. Thai salad gave me and my friend dry heaves for an hour. The salad was old, the grilled steak pieces were rock hard and the peanut sauce tasted fermented.
How the HELL do you screw up a salad?
I don't know what they did to it, but ever since (and this was 5 weeks ago) I can't eat or smell peanuts without getting nauseous.
i found a fat green worm in my pre-prepared salad at the Metro Cafe chain. That was the worst-- i'm used to little cereal bugs (most often in grape nuts)-- i usually just pick them out and proceed with my meal, but this worm definitely crossed the line.
I just had it this month, 42 years in NYC and hands down the worst, absolutely worst meal in the 5 boros was at...dave & buster's in times square. it's what I get for going to a theme restaurant installed to serve all the out of town hipster trash that relocated here from bumfuck.
#23, which Metro Cafe was it?
Rockfish sushi with wriggling worms on top. Courtesy of Tomo Sushi uptown.
dont go to the europa cafe on 32nd and 7th. found a HUGE grasshopper in my salad. after they tossed it with dressing...it was still alive!
I thought food poisoning does not take effect until the food begins digestion, which would happen a few hours after eating.
the lodge, williamsburg. how that plays stays in business is beyond me. i still get sick when i think about my experience there, and it was a year and a half ago.
gael_greene: you're right. dave & busters is like the hipster mecca. not only is it located in the up-and-coming hipster nabe' times square, it also has super hipster things like nascar simulators, coors light and Time Crisis 4.
YOU. ARE. OLD.
Come on- hipsters love NASCAR- they are always showing off those hats, right? Er... Truck series hats? No?
Anyway- anyone have a story that is about bad food and doesn't end in vomiting?
Yeah, I have a story that doesn't end in vomiting. I went to a Golden Corral once, (why don't ask) and sampled from their large buffett. Before I even left the resaturant I had green diahrrea. Gross, never eat from a buffet in the midwest again.
By far the worst food I've ever had incidently was on the worst vacation I've ever been on. Vancouver, BC. I forgot the name of the place, but it's some diner in the mountains. Boasted as the best and largest steak in town... What a joke... burnt, rubbery, and size of a hockey puck. Hell, I felt like I was eating a hockey puck. I have no idea how they screwed up the mixed veggies... there's ZERO taste, just texture. It was like I was eating styrofoam in the shape of peas, carrots, broccoli, etc.
Worst food in NYC region? A pizza joint in Syosset in Long Island owned by Jewish people. The pizza pie straight out of the oven has a lake of cheese fat that threatens to overspill the crust. Horrible cheese if you can call it that, horrible odd sauce -- probably military C rations from WWII? -- and clearly a Jewish bread taste to the crust. Ugh...
I must be pretty sheltered -- my worst meal didn't involve a restaurant, nor dire illness. I went to eat at a friends house. Turns out he was in dire financial straits... he made "potato pizzas" with small potatoes, ketchup, and green shredded cheese. (He said the mold just "added flavor".) Then after dinner, he tried to recruit me into a multi-level marketing scheme....
PS: Green "worms" in a salad would be fairly harmless caterpillars. Grasshoppers are also fairly innocuous. (They're actually edible, but not raw, much less alive. Think crayfish etc, but the leg muscles are the "meat".) Of course, for any restaurant to serve a salad containing live insects, immediately suggests careless preparation.
I also once found a stray locust in a jar of kimchee, but I returned the jar to the store without further incident. Random fact: locusts are actually kosher, probably because once the locusts come through, there's nothing *else* to eat!
Joe O's . worst food EVER.
Ranch 1.
While eating my grilled chicken sandwich I happened upon a cocoon like pod about 2 inches long between my lettuce and tomato. Thank god I didn't bite into it. I threw it away and never ate there again. ever.
Fruit Shake place in Penn Station downstairs.
Was waiting for my banana, kiwi, strawberry shake and while the guy was ringing up my order a HUGE roach was on the wall..proceeded to crawl INTO the shake machine and ended up IN the shake. I told the guy "there is a BUG on the wall..theres a BUG!" he turned around..didn't see it..turned on the machine and I got the hell outta there fast..never to return.
Witnessed the hot dog mini stand directly across from the stairway in Penn Station..the magazine store..they had their hot dogs stored in a plastic storage case with no top on the floor underneath the machine. UHHH!!!!
Had poisoning from Chickpea (the place near St. Mark's that's been recommended here for some reason). Spent the next 48 hours vomiting or shitting non-stop and had to go to the hospital as a result of dehydration. I think it was the first time I had a sense of what dying must feel like. I literally retch every time I walk past.
I wonder how many of these poisonings would have been averted if you guys actually LOOKED AT & SMELLED the food first BEFORE devouring it.
I'm thinkin 87.3 % at least.
2 out of 3 of my severe food poisoning incidents invloved vegertarian fare (the other was prawns). In the rare instance meat was involved, it most likely resulted in something tolerable, yet unpleasant enough in which you wouldn't have wanted to have a romantic partner present for the duration of the evening (like Indian food).
The first was a Chinese restaurant by 6th Av and 18th st. They served me a tofu and mushroom dish that gave me serious runs for 3 days straight, when I was supposed to be working an on-site freelance job. Thanks for nothing, assholes!
The second took place about a year ago - I had eaten Garden of Eden's salad bar on 23rd, and started feeling queasy. Later at home, as another person stated, I couldn't tell which end needed tending to first. I thought I was going to die, and made a temporary bed on the bathroom floor out of a towel. I couldn't stomach flat water, and made an energency call to a lovely friend who brought me seltzer and gatorade. she seriously saved my life.
Two days later, the Garden of Eden guy said it might have been "bad feta." They offered me A FREE LUNCH!!!!!! The only reason i took it was to get over my immediate fear of lentils, but I sure as hell haven't been back since.
Have you ever been to a friend's house to eat and the food just ain't no good?
I mean the macaroni's soggy, the peas are mush, and the chicken just tastes like wood
when i was 15 i bought a nyc hot dog from a street vendor on a class trip. it crunched as if it was an apple. spit it out immediately. to this day i have no idea what was in there and i have never eaten a hot dog since. i am now 31.
"curry in a hurry" certainly lived up to its name in that it gave both me and my sister SEVERE gastric distress in a hurry a few hours after we ate it. the filthy water glasses should have tipped me off not to eat there. never again.
Bought some almonds from bulk bin at store on 16th & 3rd. Get close to bottom of (small) bag and note that very small maggots look amazingly similar to almond dust/crumbs. Note preponderance of maggots in maggots/crumbs ratio. Vomit.
Observed friend get to bottom of shake at some diner and find a large chunk of meat that could not even be identified as beef, pork, etc. Just funny.
Just a tip on the half-formed duckling heads--even better are half-formed kitten or bunny heads. And those have been pretty awesome lately.
gael_greene: YOU. ARE. OLD. Go to bed now.
my friend had the worst.. bit into a slice of blueberry pie and hit a HUMAN TOOTH!
A year ago, my girlfriend bought a quiche from the Whole Foods at the TimeWarner Center for my first meal in NYC after living in CA for 5 years. 3 hours later I was doubled over on the toilet, simultaneously evacuating my bowel and stomach contents. It didn't let up for 48 hours.
Needless to say, food poisoning can come from bugs, chemicals, bacteria, or the toxins that bacteria produce. Which means you may feel only a little bit sick, really sick, not sick for a day and then really sick, or sick right away. There's no way to predict it.
Ok, I'll throw in my story. High school cafeteria. Cinnamon-raisin bagel. I bite into the bagel, only to pull out this chewy object. I take it out of my mouth to find, viola, a bandaid! In a flattened circular shape, so I'm assuming it was once on someone's fingertip, and got lost in the dough.
Delish!
For those curious-- the Metro Cafe at which I feasted on a fatty green worm was on Lexington and 51st St.
Here's a nice food combo you can try at home if you want to induce vomitting and diarrhea for two days straight, I learned about it the hard way:
Bought some sushi from Zeytinia (spicy tuna, Eel, and Salmon mix). Was still hungry and all I had in the fridge was yogurt. So I promptly ate that. Two hours later everything was coming out every which way. I survived on saltines and gatorade for the next two days. I'm suspecting the raw fish didn't mix well in my stomach with the live active bacteria culture in the yogurt...Never tried this combo again, but if anyone wants to verify this result for me, let me know how it goes...
Jane Minty: I think that with many tofu dishes, if the tofu is a softer (i.e. wetter) variety, the water can harbor bacteria. My theory is that this can cause problems if the tofu is eaten raw or cooked really quickly (i.e. not thoroughly) for people whose bodies aren't acclimated to those bacteria. When I lived on the UES there was a Thai place I loved, and seemed clean enough, but every time I had a tofu curry instead of just-veggie curry or seafood curry, there'd be some burning bowel distress to pay the next morning. I think it was just the way that specific place stored or prepped the tofu that my body couldn't handle, because I haven't had a problem since.
#20, when was this? I think i might have been there...
In a misguided (but oddly touching) display of ethnic and religious inclusion, my college cafeteria served this meal for Passover: lamb shanks and latkes made of instant potatoes. I didn't get sick from it because I didn't eat it! They also served a lot of pizza, which they would use as canvasses for some pretty ghastly late-night experiments, such as "Macaroni Lover's Pizza", which I DID eat...That was about five years ago but I think I'm still digesting it.
My worst food story is about road food. My grandmother is in the hospital in Bridgeport, about 2 hours up route 95. I stop for lunch at the Fairfield "Diner and Vegetarian Enclave" and eat a tuna-steak burger. Continue on to the hospital and it soon becomes clear that I am seriously poisoned! I sweat through the visit with Grandma, spend 30 minutes in the bathroom evacuating my entire soul, and then head back out on the highway with a pounding headache and bleary eyes. Thought I was going to drive off the road and die.
My worst meal ever since coming to NYC in '89 was when I took my mom out to eat at Bacchus on Atlantic Ave. in Brooklyn. I had eaten there before, and thought it was okay. But I'll never eat there again. First we ordered mussels. They were high. We sent them back. Then we ordered grapefruit salads, and the grapefruit was fermented! Fizzy on the tongue, gross. So we sent it back. Then we got a beet salad, and the beets were moldy! So we left and went to the Bedouin Tent instead--much better.
The worst meal and food poisoning too boot I have ever experienced has been BOXERS on West 4th And Barrow Sts.
Not only was/is the food disgusting but the attitude of the staff complements the food.
I'm a full-time musician and was put up by a random family once while on tour. I'd never met the people and don't even remember their names. But I remember cobwebs throughout the house and the fact that the mom looked like a witch. She made breakfast and one of her long, stringy black hairs ended up fried to my bacon. To top it off, the glass of water that she brought me looked like it had FISH FOOD in it... multi-colored floating pieces of who-knows-what. I got out of their FAST!
(edit: got out of THERE, not THEIR. Sorry!)
Dano on Fifth ave and 27th? THE WORST. mushroom ravioli that put me in the bathroom for a few hours. no bueno. and I was at work! sigh.
Spring 1996: For dinner I ate a box of Murray's frozen buffalo wings, which I bought at Key Food on Avenue A. The wings tasted fine. Over an hour later, I developed mild nausea and terrible gas pains that left me in a fetal position for hours. I felt like a hot air balloon about to explode. I tried to force it out of both ends of my body, but nothing would come out!
Finally, at around 3 a.m. I took a cab to Beth Israel, where doctors were all over me, checking everything. I had a fever, which brought up the possibility of appendicitis. They even gave me a sonogram, during which the doctor said, "Nice gall bladder!"
It turned out I had gastroenteritis, which goes away on its own in a couple of days. Damn frozen buffalo wings!
I used to get a lot of food poisioning from chinese restaurants. I refuse to go to any of them anymore. They have really gross hygiene and think nothing of mice falling into their food, it must be a delicacy with them. eww
A story of two roaches:
1) I was eating with a gf at Amin indian restaurant on 7th Ave. in Park Slope and looked over to the wall on the right and saw a huge 2 inch cockroach walking the wall
2) As I was waiting for my burger to be prepared at "The Grill" In Rockefeller Center, I saw a gigantic 3/4 inch roach like bug walking between two signs on the wall behind the food prep counter.
ew
Worst meal in 30 yrs. living in Manhattan - ESCA. Horrible food, horrible service.
Best meal - Whym
I was in Philadelphia and staying at a hotel right next to Reading Market. Having thoroughly explored the wonderful food there, I decided to opt for a little change on my last night in town. I was limited to walking, and I had noticed a pub that is adjacent to the Market.
The name is along the lines of "Independence Brew Pub." I stopped in, dining solo, and ordered a local beer. The server took my food order, and I continued to nurse my beer while taking in the ambience. So far, so good.
THEN THE MOUSE CAME. I saw it scurry across the floor, about 2 booths in front of me, as it ran to the base of a table in the middle of a dining room. I should note that the mouse came from behind a 'serving station' where there were FOUR servers carrying on a conversation, oblivious to all of this!
Just as I called over one of the servers to tell her what had happened, a runner from the kitchen brought out my food. He seemed astonished when I told him I was leaving and that I wouldn't be eating - nor paying for - the food. I left cash for the beer along with a hefty tip and headed for the door. As I was getting there, the server had spoken to the manager about the situation and he met me at the door. He apologized, commenting that "the snow drives them in here from the subway" (which is also adjacent). He also said that "the exterminator came out, but I guess he needs to come back." Okay, sure. So apparently they only have mice at that restaurant when it snows in Philly. That's too often. I won't be going back.
Frederick's on Front St. in Philly. Never ate there, after reading this you'll know why. A few years ago, I worked there for 1 week and there were 3 things that disgusted me so much to the point I could not go back...#1 Maggots in the biscotti #2 chicken left uncovered in the walk-in for so long that if I tapped it, it would sound and feel like I was tapping wood. And #3 there was some cake left from a party that it looked like someone had run their fingers through the icing. The chef/owner said to fix the icing, put it on the dessert tray and serve. If I will not eat something I will not sell or give it to anyone else. I never went back.