A musical about the witches from The Wizard of Oz breaks West End box office records, its producers say...

London-born rapper Sway is to be honoured at the BET Hip-Hop awards in the US...

Pioneering screenwriter Nigel Kneale, best known for the Quatermass TV serials and films, dies aged 84...

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I think half of you are racist, sexist, and have a fear of the heavy....get a life...your $2 is worth the same as theirs.....if you don't like it...walk......cause skinny folks and those who work out sweat and stink even worse....

@#125, I do have the utmost respect for my fellow commuters. No I don't take up two seats, Thanks for the Ron J. reference though . You ask any man and they will tell you that sitting with their legs cramped up like that is very unconfortable . For some of us it's painful and unatural. As far as my thighs, There not greasy, There normal man thighs . Since you want to talk about thighs, How about the people that will try to squeeze there big asses into one solitary seat in between other people knowing full well that they can't fit their . They end up sitting on both persons seated on each side!!! Talk about grease, and thighs!

Attack of the "FATTIES" That's why I choose the corner seats.

@ #113, dO YOU HAVE BIG BOOBIES? Do you show them off for the riding public to enjoy? If not then why are you complaining . Oh and while were still on the subject, I don't like people who get on the train with smelly fast food . It stinks the whole train up . Look I like KFC to, But keep that shit in the bag ! When your done eating don't leave the remains on the train. Take it with you and dump it in the trash. Also to the dumb-ass that took a dump in the conductor's booth on the "M" train . You nasty M*$#@$%^F$%^er!!! I know you get off at Knickerboxer Av. You thought that was funny I wish I had my camaraphone with me that day . Nasty bitch !!!!!!!

I have some bad news for those of you hating on fat people. Our numbers are increasing exponentially. Some day in the very near future we will be in the majority.

Be afraid, be very afraid....

My own particular beef is with the people ahead of me who take one step into the train, then stop to survey the car while all the available seats get grabbed up by people who come in other doors and now you are stuck behind the idiot and get no seat.

Fat people should be banned from public view. Better yet, ship them to Africa to feed to all those starving people.

This is hysterical-- love the racism!:

"Hispanics...stand in the doors and lean on poles and blast music on their crappy headphones. Black people tend to eat stinky things, drop the wrappers on the floor, and sleep on the benches, and sit with their legs spread out. Indians stink, Asians have huge bags and laundry carts full of crazy shit, white people read newspapers. Women have strollers and tend to be really fat." What's so hurtful about racism, usually, is that it's TRUE!

My own particular beef is with the people ahead of me who take one step into the train, then stop to survey the car while all the available seats get grabbed up by people who come in other doors and now you are stuck behind the idiot and get no seat. Also, hate the fatties. Hate the pole-huggers. Hate loud people. Oh, the racist quoted above forgot to mention the Asians who shout loud gibberish to each other. Also, ANYONE who talks during the morning commute. No, no, no!!! It's quiet time, idiots.

And what about the school kids en masses at 3pm? GROAN! HATE to get stuck in a car full of high school or junior high kids.

And what about the friggin out-of-towners who wear pastel clthing, travel in huge, doe-eyed groups, and let their spawn SWING from the bars!?!? They should rot in hell.

And I'm just getting warmed up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Greatest Subway Story Ever

While on the LIRR (which is possibly worse than the subway could ever hope to be), a guy whips out his cell and starts talking loud enough for the entire car to hear him.

My friend waits until he's done and then calls his wife and screams "HI HONEY" into the phone.

He then said "NO HONEY, NOTHING'S WRONG...I JUST FELT LIKE BEING A DICK ON A CELLPHONE."

I ride the D everyday uptown and I swear there's this girl named Marina who follows me. She is always on my train and i swear she rubs up against me and grabs my junk everyday ~ how annoying.

Apparently no one likes other people riding the subways with them. I don’t know what to tell y’all, maybe move to LA? Then you can hate on traffic and other drivers. Subways are smelly, gross, nasty things. We ride them because we can’t afford cars/parking/daily taxi rides. Most of you probably hate the other people on the subway because they remind you of the shitty commute you have, but you know what, they hate you and their shitty commute too, so let’s just try to get along. But while we’re talking about hates:

1) People who stand an inch in front of my face.

2) People who get all aggressive on crowded trains.

3) Strangers who yell at each other, hint, if you are yelling at a total stranger, the jury is out on whether or not they are crazy, but you certainly are.

Subway loves:

1) When the train operator forgets to turn on the interior lights before going in the tunnel and only remembers one stop in, so for the whole ride through the tunnel it’s like being in a haunted house subway train. Though this probably emboldens the subway gropers so maybe it should be a hate. Also, how does the conductor realize the lights aren’t on? Does someone finally tell him? Is he signaled by a train conductor on the train across the platform?

2) The conversations you can overhear. For example listening to a single mom with a loud Queens accent describe having a threesome with a couple in front of her kid, punctuating each sentence with “Wait, it gets weirder.”

One time I saw tow kids get on(they looked just like brother and sister) and they just started going at it, making out, groping, hands down each others undies. Then an older couple gets on, old enough to be the kids parents, and they just start peeing and pooping all over the place, and using the mixture as a massage oil as they start giving each other a sexual massage, which is when the kids join in with the older couple. Then a hunched over little lady got on, and she started rubbing up against all the poles and licking them and lubing them with the afore mentioned goo. Then she proceded to do the same on the pole of a little old man sitting and shaking in the corner of the car. They said something about the aristocrats, but I was too busy vomiting to know what they were talking about.

Last week, I grabbed a beautiful woman's ass in the subway. She responded by punching me in the balls. I came immediately.

in reference to NotAmused...honey, if Ron Jeremy can sit with his legs closed, so can you. There's nothing there that's so big that requires you to sit like a baboon with your legs spread wide apart. And nobody else on the train wants your grimy thighs in their space. You want to take up three seats with your 'equipment,' PAY FOR THEM. Or else try behaving like you were raised in civilization and have consideration for others.

Peeves:

Train conductors or temperature systems that don't respond

to the actual temperature outside. If it's 50 degrees out, the A/C

SHOULD NOT BE on.

Strollers

Spitters

Eaters

Parents

Children

Annoying, self-righteous parents

Obnoxious, loud, crying and screaming children

Pregnant people

Pregnant people who expect you to give up your seat. It's like

you're doing the world a favor bringing more people into it. It's

not a damned miracle - dogs and rats can do it too. Noone cares

about you and your distended belly and your entitlement complex.

People who don't move out of the way when people try to get off

the train.

People who SIT ON SUBWAY STEPS. Do you not realize that this

is a bottleneck area?

People who lay across 3-4 seats worth of space in a crowded train.

People who can't seem to work a shower or find soap.

People with mammoth-sized buttocks taking 2-3 seats.

People who are likely to vomit. If you're that drunk/sick, take a CAB.

People who actually *shove* you straight out of the way to get to a seat or

to the door to the next car.

Likes:

People who talk to themselves incoherently. This can be really funny.

People who sing/air$instrument to themselves. Usually funny.

An empty train car.

mihow: this sentence led me to think of a chick magnet.

"I mean, unless I wanna pick of chicks or dudes."

sorry.

Goodnight. signing off.

Fat people, black people, asians, and hispanics. You all need to learn some manners you low-life pigs.

On the flip side, the most polite riders seem to be at the Grand Central-Times Square shuttle.

Not surprising. White people know how to behave like human beings.