Mitzvah Tank Invasion!

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Yes, we are aware of widespread reports of a line of 56 Mitzvah Tanks driving slowly through Manhattan. At first, we thought the Hasidim had decided to topple the godless Bloomberg administration in a bloody coup, but then we got this press release from Lubavitcher World Headquarters:

New Yorkers and tourists heading out for lunch this Thursday April 6 2006 could be greeted by an unexpected surprise. A parade, consisting of fifty-six motor homes, known as mitzvah tanks, will march through the streets of Manhattan, in celebration of the 104th birthday of the Lubavitcher Rebbe, Rabbi Menachem Mendel Schneerson.

A team of young rabbinical students, ranging from sixteen to twenty-five years of age, has raised approximately $75,000 to host the mitzvah tank parade...

TENTATIVE Parade Route: Brooklyn: Eastern Parkway TO Flatbush Ave. Manhattan Bridge to Sixth Ave. Up Sixth Ave. to 59th Street Down Fifth Ave. to Twenty Third Street

So that's a relief! We were totally worried we'd have to grow beards!

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a few years ago, late one monday nite, a mitzvah tank was parked on the corner of houston and A. i think it as purim - they were giving out vodka shots and invited me and my friends inside... long story short, i refuse to be prayed over and end up getting smacked in the head with a big flag pole by a jubilant yound hasid.

so watch yr head if u go in the mitzvah tank.

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a few years ago, late one monday nite, a mitzvah tank was parked on the corner of houston and A. i think it was purim - they were giving out vodka shots and invited me and my friends inside... long story short, i refuse to be prayed over and end up getting smacked in the head with a big flag pole by a jubilant yound hasid.

so watch yr head if u go in the mitzvah tank.

I don't know why the photo reminds me of the Abbey Road cover. Might be a med cycle thing.

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isn't that guy Schneerson dead? then again, i could be an ignorant goyem.

it just drove by my office!

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They went by Madison Square Park via 5th Avenue too.

Looked like everyone was having fun.

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i've had them fucking harrass me in the street (midtown). yeah, might look a little jewish and actually be M.O.T., but they chase you down the street after you say "get away" and yell at you. shit like, 'you're always welcome', and some other yiddish or hebrew stuff i can't understand, but I'm always welcome, they should probably not chase me and fucking yell. And then ask for money.

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The $75K is probably just for the gas, right?

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How old is that photo?
The address on the "tank" is in Brooklyn, but the phone number is a 212! Quite odd.

One of the current tanks has a great vanity plate that reads TANK ONE.

Schneerson died in 1994. The Lubavitch haven't replaced him at the top, and some think he's the messiah and will be resurrected any day now. Sound familiar?

Does this have anything to do with the young Orthodox Jews on 23rd Street now, stopping passers-by (like myself) and asking them if they might be Jewish?

I kinda wondered what was going on. I get accosted by all sorts of folks on 23rd & 6th, but this was a first.

I'm starting to get ticked off at these posts. Just saying.

"these posts" ?

what are you referring to?

does someone have a small dick?
sounds like it!

First they occupy Palestine and displace millions of muslims, and now the East Coast???

The Line must be drawn HERE!

^Oh, that's just Kojak, poor dear, who doesn't know sh!t from shinola. Time for you to take the blue pill.

@ TimN: LOL "Abbey Road" was the first thing I thought of too.

ryan:

That would be them.

Dudes follwed your webmaster halfway down the street, after an initial question of 'are you Jewish' was answered in the negative. I guess they had to make sure.

www.forgotten-ny.com

ethos, I've had enough of your Hutspah Mr

Fucking Mitzvah tanks should be confiscated and pounded. They are always driving around with bullhorns saying some shit in hebrew with loudspeakers disturbing the peace. The worst is when those hasids come out and into buildings going "DO ANY JEWS LIVE HERE?" with those tree branch thingies. I always wonder what the fuck they do to other jews with those tree branches.

As the great thespian Edward G. once said, "Where's your Messiah now, huh???" Schneerson will rise up and save us from Gestapo cops who harrass little old men yakking away on their cell while driving.

Everyone must obey JEWISH LAW! Those damn Nazi Cops don't know that we control that neighborhood. How dare they say we will treat an old poor defenseless man like a "NIGGER". I was at the protest and we acted that way cause the police said they would kill us and put us in concentration camps and were yelling "fuck you dirty jews! We will shoot you all! Heil Hitler. White Power!". I couldn't believe it.

ummm Kojak, it's "chutzpah" not "Hutspah." But then Yiddish is all Greek to me.

I was also there and the Police were monsters. They brandished their guns and shoved them into peoples faces. One police officer beat a woman, took her infant son and said "the only good jew is a dead jew" and then branded a swastika on her child's forehead with a dull blade. This is why we were angry and mildly protested in a peaceful manner.

Thanks Alex

I forgot my Webster's Jewish Dictionary at home

I think your getting what happened in Brooklyn mixed up with what happened in poland, 1942 Hebrew Hammer...

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whenever these idiots ask me if i'm jewish i respond with "are you?!" and get out of there...

Great! Another Gothamist headline inspires anti-semitism! And this time it wasn't that jap Jen Chung!

Aint she Chinese? Mike you dumbass

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Kojak and Mike...the dumbass leading the dumbass.

does anyone know how to get back on to the internet superhighway from here?

1- Where on earth did you get that picture, and what is its connection to NY? It's nearly 30 years old, and was borrowed for a week from Detroit!

2- No Lubavitcher on the Mitzvah Tanks EVER asked anyone for money - not even a cent. Their purpose is solely to re-acquaint Jews with Judaism.

3- A small 1 line blessing is made and one shakes the palm branch, together with a citron, and willow and myrtle branches, symbolizing unity.

4- If you bother reading the Bible, you'll see in black and white that G-d gave Israel to the Jews. The Arabs pushed out the Jews, and the Jews only came back home. The Arabs ordered their own people to evacuate. (Check it out -- it's a fact!) Arab-Israeli citizens were always treated well in Israel.

Nice knowing you guys. I won't be back.

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