Celebrities: They're Just Like Us. Except They Cook.

Set your TiVo's, kids. "Celebrity Cooking Showdown" is scheduled for the week of April 17th on NBC. This week-long competition pits various "celebrities" against each other in a culinary smackdown of sorts, judged by food critic Gael Greene and high-end event planner Colin Cowie. The motley crew of celebs includes Kansas City Chiefs tight end Tony Gonzalez, Ja Rule, Tom Arnold, Gabrielle Reece, Days of Our Lives' Allison Sweeney, supermodel Naomi Campbell, reigning Miss USA Chelsea Cooley and country singer Big Kenny. The show is hosted by none other than Alan Thicke from Growing Pains and the Food Network's Sandra Lee (who hosts Semi-Homemade, not high on the Gothamist love-list) will host the show (at least she's not judging).

According to Zap2it, the competition goes a little like this:

Three celebs will compete in a cook-off on each of the first three episodes, after getting a culinary crash course from one of a trio of famous chefs: Wolfgang Puck, Cat Cora and Govind Armstrong. The winner from each night will compete in the final kitchen battle on Thursday, with the winner revealed Friday. Viewers will be able to vote on the presentation of the finalists' feasts; those scores will be combined with Cowie and Greene's marks for taste.

We're scared.