A Comedian Walks in to a Bar...

Lindsay points us to this hidden piece of news on David Cross' website.

I may very soon be part owner of a bar/club/performance space here in NY on Orchard St. in the Lower East Side. Now, before you go and accuse me of selling out, know that I fully intend to continue my practice of keeping my ticket prices (at least for my shows or Tinkle) at an absurd minimum. As the dollar devalues, inflation rises and rents go up, I will continue to keep it cheap. Beer on the other hand will still be twelve dollars for a new one and eight dollars for a used one.

The guys we are buying it from have run it into the ground and I think with about $150,000 put into it, it can be right nice. I won’t tell you how much the lease is costing us because you’ll think I’m crazy. But that’s why they call it an “investment” – because it makes an “ass” out of “u” and “me”. It has an upstairs and a downstairs. The first floor has a stage and green room area and of course a bar, and downstairs is just a bar (but with fun “bar stuff” in it). We have to make some renovations to it and do some serious alterations (fucking handicapped jerkheads and their stupid handicapped accessible bathroom demands! How dare they!) And put in a very expensive, but well worth it sound system, but then, outside of aesthetic stuff, we’re good to go. Later on, when we’re in the black, we’ll put in the strip pole and water slide.

We're betting the bar is Eleven which is on Orchard Street. We've actually seen him there before, possibly scoping the place out. The space is really cool and we were wondering when that stage would actually be used. Hopefully there will also be bands booked at the new space (on top of the comedy shows he insinuated to) because Cross has great taste in music.