Eating In: Easter Super-Fun Candy Balls!

Eating In: Easter Super-Fun Candy Balls!

Easter is Gothamist's favorite candy holiday. Sure, on Passover you can get those jellied fruit slices and chocolate-covered matzot, but it's only on Easter that you can find our three most favorite treats: Peeps, chocolate Easter Bunnies, and Cadbury Creme Eggs. Often, while shopping for our candy, we have wondered if there was another way to enjoy these delicacies, beyond, you know, just unwrapping and eating them. Tonight we decided to find out. If you have a strong stomach and a disabling sugar addiction, read on.

For our first dish, we decided to combine four packages of Peeps into two PeepPuffs. This was the easiest of our preparations- no cooking was required. To create them:
1. Unwrap the Peeps (very important!)
2. Combine Peeps in bowl (we prefer to segregate our Peeps by color- please do not write in with complaints of bias!)
3. Smush. (You will get somewhat sticky.)
4. Eat your PeepPuffs (really- these things don't sit well- a half hour later, we tried to get them out of the bowl, and they had formed an advanced form of superglue.)

Eating In: Easter Super-Fun Candy Balls!

For our next challenge, we decided to combine three easter bunnies into a single HumungoBunny. However, we underestimated the difficulty of sculpting a chocolate bunny by hand, and frankly, all those little bunny eyes started freaking us out. So instead we decided to make BunnyCakes. Instructions:
1. Unwrap bunnies- remove bows (seriously- we almost choked on the little blue sash one of them was wearing)
2. Smush. You may find it helpful to use a mallet. Try to ignore the subtle but unmistakeable screams.
3. Empty into a large pan, and melt over low heat, constantly stirring. (Warning: avoid overheating- the smoke tipped off our significant other, and she gave us a real talking-to for using her best pans to cook "bootleg candy.")
4. Pour excess liquid into cup- drink. (Best to let it cool a little bit- the bunnies had their revenge when we were scalded terribly!)
5. Pour remainder of goo into cupcake cups. Cool in fridge until warm, and then eat.

Eating In: Easter Super-Fun Candy Balls!

At this point, we were feeling somewhat queasy, but we forged on for the sake of science and art. If you are going to cook only one candy-concoction this year, it should be: the Cadbury Creme BigBall. Don't get confused- this isn't simply a slightly larger creme egg; you can buy those in the store. This is what happens when you mash up nine eggs into a single huge, incredibly greasy, strangely intoxicating ball. Instructions:
1. Carefully peel eggs out of diabolical silver wrapper.
2. Smush (once again, a mallet is helpful here. We found that some of the eggs were strangely durable- as if they were fighting to live!)
3. Combine into a single large ball (this requires strong nerves- the "yolk" goes everywhere and is largely impervious to water. Seriously: we needed some of that automechanic soap to get this stuff off.)
4. Eat! (It was literally impossible to choke down more than one bite of this stuff, so we melted down the rest into a couple of more CadburyCremeCupCakes, to eat for breakfast tomorrow.)

Eating In: Easter Super-Fun Candy Balls!

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Comments (19) [rss]

Dude. Were you stoned when you got this idea?

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jake, you've outdone yourself. this entry is so great. and i suspect that the third bunny on the right knew what was going to happen to him.

and do you have to take lactaid when you eat chocolate, b/c you would need some serious amounts before ingesting all that.

It's been nice knowing you, Jake. Rest in peace, my friend.

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I hope the rampant diarrhea has died down.

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So disturbing, yet wonderful!

Once you've eaten yourself sick, you might try PeepArt - they make fairly amusing and unusual shapes when microwaved.

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best! post! ever!
(note to self: stop taking advice from jake dobkin)

I'm with Katie... microwave the Peeps! : )

The Cadbury BigBall concept never occured to me. Nice. Last year I battered and deep-fried Cadbury Eggs (among other things), though:
http://www.scaredycatstalker.com/recipes2.html#marsbars

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I just moved here a few months ago and am shocked by NYCs lack of Cadbury Eggs!! I've looked all over and have only found 1, yes 1, store that sold them (sold....they're all gone now)!! Where are all the eggs! My mouth is watering from this post!
Help!

Duane Reade doesn't really have them, but I found them at Walgreens on 14th St and at the CVS on Dittmars in Astoria.

I googled: gourmet chocolate bunny +high end
& got this?! Love it!

I think I may well have found the cure for my overactive sweet tooth...daily viewing of your Descent Into Easter Hell.

Hm, I don't know... all these photos look staged. I doubt he ingested that much of his mortal enemy. :D What no hamentashen?

Oh gross. Younga said that this was one of the best Gothamist posts ever, so I had to check it out...ewwwwww, but very amusing. My roommate also concurs, but asks if this is perhaps a form of animal cruelty, she finds the bunnies cute and not designed to be "killed in the hot pot." And she asks, "Who is this guy?? - Unbelievable"

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