The Tipping Point

I hate waiters. That's kind of a joke. You see I've been a chef for about eighteen years. They screw stuff up, they change the menu by allowing guests to make ridiculous substitutions and do all kinds of other stuff that really gets my dander up. I am certain that it's a two way street, though. Good waiters are truly skilled professionals and I've seen plenty. A good waiter makes your dining experience memorable, sometimes as much as the food. He or she helps your yuppie lawyer ass close that deal or score with that babe. You have absolutely no idea what goes into flawless restaurant service. They by and large know a lot more about wine than you do whether you think so or not. They will pair it with the food that I make so that what you are eating tastes good. Tipping along the aforementioned parameters is the system and they don't make a living wage without it. Really good ones generally aren't getting rich either. They may be doing quite well, but still. Yes I am an interested party. I want them to be good. You do too and the way that happens in the USA is by your participation in said system. Those of you that stiff the server because you feel it's your right or on principle are either complete see-you-next-Tuesdays or pricks and you're not as you hope, sticking it to the man. It's pretty simple. Rule Number 28 of Modern Drunkard Magazine's (which is wonderful reading btw) 86 Rules of Boozing is "If you can't afford to tip, you can't afford to drink in a bar." The same holds true for eating in nice restaurants. The only good waiter is a dead waiter. Maybe, sometimes, but you non-tipping lot deserve to die in a really unpleasant fashion. Yeah I hate waiters, but I hate you people way more.

P.S. Everyone should watch the opening scene of The Reservoir Dogs, just for fun.

i may not live in new york, but i am appaled by the reasons to not tip. i'm a waiter in virginia, and i've had my share of bad guests, but i've also had a few really good tables. yes i am a college student, and i don't intend on making this my career, but you have to appreciate the time and work a server puts into making your evening memorable. it's all a server can do to work up a smile and a plesant demeanor after a long day. plus when you don't tip, you're making it rough for everyone that comes in after you, because now, your server is in a bad mood.

as has been pointed out, by not tipping you are taing food out of the server's mouth (i don't know about the other servers here, but i have to pay for meals at my resturant), and making things tough for them in general. waiter i certainly wish i worked at you establishment (i was actually directed here from your blog).

in response to waiter's post, which no one seemed to want to touch, in my experience african americans are just as bad as everyone else as far as tipping. i'm black, and have been shafted by my "brothers and sisters", but i have also been "taken care of" by them as well.

wow. As I read all these comments, my heart has sunk. I've been in the serving industry for 12 years. For those who blame lack of education or skill as the reason for my continuous employment, I must correct you: the education I recieve on a daily basis of life and the humanities, is greater than that of one who is self-absorbed with their own wishes. I consider myself talented in many areas, but enjoy hospitality the most. I choose to wait tables, because I am good at it. Humility being my strongest trait. I am a natural at taking in a stranger and making them at home, feeding their bodies, spirits, and minds. To take them away from the ugliness of the world outside, and escape to a place where someone else can do the dirt work. That's me. All of your harsh words, your ill tempers, your judgemental and condescending comments. I take it all. Because that is what you are PAYING me to do. That is part of the service! The hardest part is not the heavy load that I carry for long hours or the filth that I clean up so you don't have to, it is how you make me feel. Every day is a gamble, I am very well aware. Some days, kindness flows with the generosity, some day the kindness flows without the generosity, some day the kindness doesn't exist and the overwhelming generosity will never make ammends. I understand that I do make mistakes and it will be reflected in my gratuity. However, I do not understand how I am not paid for giving above and beyond, just because someone likes to play God, and be above all of us dictating without a self-less thought. Restaurants will always be. Food will always be in need. To you poor tippers, we will still be here to serve you, but if you keep it up, the good servers will disappear, and what you get is the ones that will treat you how you have treated them: poorly. They will be as bitter as the world is beyond the front doors, from where you had wished to escape for the evening. Service is like a bottle of wine. The wine chosen, the cork popped, the evening begins. Then towards the end of the meal & merriment, the charge for such a relaxing evening with no dishes, arrives at the table. You cannot send back the bottle of wine, because you didn't really like it. Nor can you refuse to pay for the wonderfully prepared product or careful service, because "it wasn't all that." Because if the wine isn't spoiled its just a matter of taste. Tipping is the culture of the food service industry and whether or not you agree with that policy, it still stands. Gratuity can be included in the price of the food, as the first round of poker when everybody puts in the standard chip. It's expected. But we servers can do better than the standard, better than the expected, and here comes the gamble: by sitting in our station, you have agreed to that bet. We have gambled on you, because for some of us this IS our real job. And I do a DAMN good one!

P.S. Even if a server is tipped 15% of the food and beverage sale, from their tips, 3-5% of the overall sales are turned over to bussers, bartenders, food runners, and team workers. So when you don't tip us, we still have to Tip them, they did their job, as we did ours. We can't all suffer because you, as a guest, were a selfish, arrogant bonehead. Oh! and try not to get hit by a bus on your way home! ;)

Ok...time for my few cents. i have been waiting tables for 3 years, started at a pretty low end joint, and now i work at a upperscale seafood restaurant in a very large tourist environment. a couple things to think about for people who arent too familiar with how restaurants really work:

1. when you talk about marking up the price of food (lambchops etc) you must realize how much food gets simply thrown out. customers complain, we toss the dish, and they dont have to pay. thats...10-20$ of ingrediants the restaurant just wasted. yea we make 5 bucks a dish, but if we toss 1/10 dishes cause someone complains about this or that, the money made isnt that amazing. same applies to alcohol.

2. i do expect to get a tip from my tables. i provide a very high level of service, i do more than just get your your drinks and food, i entertain you and make the evening more fun. mention a few restaurant anecdotes, or explain something of the city to you. if you want to live in a world with no tips - then expect no service.

3. my job would be DAMN easy if all i had to do was go "hi", take order, bring drinks, deliver order, bring check. but thats not how it works. i welcome you, i explain the specials and drinks, and i answer questions you have about the meal, i check back on you during the meal, get anything you need. (point 2 - keep things entertaining).

4. waiting isnt such an easy job as you may think. most servers at upper class restaurants have to memorize a huge amount of information - the entire menu, ingrediants, drinks, garnishs, service ettiquete. we must remain calm under any fire, carry very awkward tray combinations, be on our feet for often 8+ hours, walking multiple miles. be able to ignore all the bullshit from our lives and pretend everything is perfect. if you think all of that is easy...well then you must be some kinda superman. shitty waiting is easy -- good waiting is hard!

i welcome any comments.

I can tell who has never worked in the service industry and who has. I always tip 15-20% unless the server is rude. If they mess up and aplogize or make it up to me in some other ways then I still tip them. If you don't want to tip then eat somewhere they don't have servers. We have to pay tax on our total sales to the government so if you stiff us we could actually have to pay out of our pocket. If the government didn't make me pay tax on my tips this whole argument wouldn't matter. I could care less if you tipped or not.

I find the notion that a diner must ALWAYS tip a bit unfair. I almost always tip over 20%, but on very rare occasions, when service was truly offensively bad, have declined to tip. I know servers rely on tips to live, but tips are also payments for service, they are not welfare. And waitstaff, while generally hard working and competent, occasionally genuinely don't earn a tip. An example: out for brunch, order two omlets, waitress takes order, while we're waiting, we notice she's on the phone, arguing with her boyfriend, argument gets loud, everyone in the resturant can hear it, it goes on and on, omlets take nearly 1.5 hours to get (they wait until her fight with BF is over), come cold. True story. Rare, but true. I'm supposed to TIP for this "service." Sorry. Not me. (BTW, six months later, this resturant has closed.)

I actually really enjoy these waiter websites, and don't doubt for a minute that crappy customers outnumber crappy waiters 1000:1, but don't pretend waiters are immune from criticism.

There seems to be a disconnect on this board about tipping for your average dinner, and tipping for a really terrible experience. If everything is crap, then of course you don't have to tip. But 15% is standard, and if you give your waiter 15% every single time, there is no problem. 20% may be better in some locales, just use common sense. You know what living costs are in your area. As for, "tipping is only for exceptional service," work in a damn restaurant for a week. Please. Find out how many tables per day can get exceptional service. And for all you who feel that waiting isn't a real job and feel entitled to an above average experience every minute of the day, I ask you, how do you manage to give 110% effort every hour of every day? I would really appreciate your input, and I'd like to imitate you. If you treat me with respect, I'll do everything in my power to make sure that you have a good time. But disregard me or, horrors, don't tip, and remember that the staff always gets the last laugh. Good managers know who their good waiters are, and if you stiff us and we stiff you back, guess who usually wins?

As for changing the system, start a petition and I'll sign it. But you know you're all talk, you patronizing jackasses.

I am SO glad I live in a country that does not consider tipping mandatory. Decent wages are already a part of the cost on the menu. Service charges are part of the meal. No possibility of under paying. I can only tip, to REWARD someone/place for excellent service. I can never withold a tip and have waiters in my face or bad customer service the next time, but I can certainly pay extra for above the board (price) service and food.

"Let's go out to eat tonight honey. Great! Where should we go? Oh, you remember that great WAITER we had at so and so's? That was a GREAT time, lets go there again." That's WHAT you tip for. I mean, hey if you know so much about wine and are such an epicurious fellow, why not make a statement and cook it yourself? Oh, and those great first dates where you want to "impress to undress" yeah, we help you there as well. Damn, I thought it was obvious.

OK I don't get it. You don't want to tip because you think the owner should pay a "living wage" but a the same time you will eat at these establishments and patronize them (you do pay the bill) but you don't want to leave a tip!?... So basically you are supporting the very system you are against. That does not make sense to me. I think its a way to rationalize being cheap. If your really against the "system" you won't eat out where you have to tip.

For those that disagree with 'Waiter' your living in a fantasy world. Yes he's being a little inflammatory at times but you are not being that much better.

Lets look at the whole notion of 'your bosses should pay you a real wage!'. Ok, has anyone given one iota of thought to how much a momumental change to the restuarant business this would be? Do you have ANY idea?

First off EVERY restuarant must change otherwise there will be those that decide to remain as 'tipping' establishments and will keep their food costs low. What does this lead too? Everyone will go there and a good percentage will leave bad tips, Im not saying you will personally but I don't trust people.

Second, goodbye service! Sure good waiters will still give good service but there are now a large percentage who have had any motivation removed (ie tipping) to provide that service.

Thirdly you now have payroll management, too many waiters on making 10 bucks an hour? Crap send half of em home, oh what we got busy an hour later and the restuarant is getting slammed? Too bad customer you didn't want to tip.

The system is not going to change, get over it and stop trying to make excuses for your own cheap ways. Either that or go eat at Burger King.

Oh and waiting isn't a real job? Fine, then I say again, go eat at Burger King.

Here's a few clues:

1. We don't believe we DESERVE tips. Only bad waiters do and they deserve all the crapiness they get.

2. When I provide you with prompt, pleasant and courteous service then yes, I would like to be tipped accordingly, my wage depends on it. No you are not hurting my boss by tipping me badly, you are hurting me, the system is Not going to change, GET OVER IT.

3. 15% is standard I believe if you received adequete to good service. Be my guest DON'T reward mediocrity, if you got shit service don't feel obliged to leave 15%-20%. I know when I've given crap service I fully expect to get a shit tip. On the other hand you could also reward excellence, there is nothing worse than absolutely busting your hump for a table, going above and beyond then getting left a 10% tip.

And again if you don't believe in tipping then please be our guest and go eat at restuarant where the employees make a living wage. Would you like that meal biggie sized sir?

OK

So I have read all the postings on this page and I wish to comment. As an individual that has worked both in the service industry as a waiter/bartender and as a desk jockey (2 years) I would like to say something. I have chosen to return to the restaurants because I find the job much more fun and much more personally rewarding because I get to interact with people on a daily basis. However this is a day job to pay my rent while I pursue a paying career in the theater and this brings us to the topic of tipping.

Yes the system sucks however it is the system, do all you want to change it however in the meantime please don’t punish the middle man. I personally do prefer tipping when I dine out because it is the most substantial way to tell the person who has been "taking care of me" how they did. I also ask that if I as a waiter give you bad service don't tip me 15-20% leave 10% otherwise how do I know I'm doing a bad job and if you don't leave me a tip and I did well you are sending me a mixed message.

Again I say the system may suck but if you do not leave a tip you are actually taking money out of my pocket. Every week my paycheck, if you can call it that, is $0 that’s because it starts off at $3.25 an hour and that all goes towards taxes. So the only money I make is what I’m tipped minus the money I am required by the restaurant to tip out to my support staff no matter how well they do their job. At the end of every night I am required to tip out those who help me from my sales not my tips so if my sales were $1,000 I tip out $10 to the bartender (1%) $20 to the bussers (2%) and $20 to my runners (2%) This does not mean that I don't bus tables or run food it just means these people are supposed to help me do these things. So I have tipped out 5% on my sales therefore if I only made 15% (because at least one table a night of foreigners leaves nothing so it screws up my percentage) I walk with 10% or $100 not great but not bad. However when I get stiffed it takes away from good tips on other tables. Just a note I don't get stiffed because of bad service I have had tables praise me and tell how wonderful I was and leave $3 on $97, that made me mad.

A lot of people in the service industry are bitter and resentful that they wait on people hand and foot (I have days I just want to strangle people too) but if I treat you with respect and do all I can for you please show your appreciation. If you get rude or bad service don’t tip but if it was a problem with the restaurant talk to a manager make a complaint, tipping is your comment card to the server not the restaurant.

thks

I couldn't agree more with Claudio, Waiter's points just don't hold up.

Tipping in the US has become so ingrained in the service industry that many times you are expected to brainlessly leave a 20% tip. Why, because the fucking system says so, on any service no matter how good or bad your experience was. A sense of entitlement has taken over when it comes to tips and a waiter could fuck your order up, be obnoxious, unattentaive and still expect a big tip. In NYC bars, you order a $4 draught beer that takes 10 seconds to serve, and if you don't give a dollar tip, good luck getting another one when it gets busy. The whole deal is ridiculous. However, this does not extend to the minimum wage service jobs, like fast food or maid service. Because tipping is programmed into the American mind, few can think outside the box. Few see how gradually, salariers are lowered because one earns lots in tips. In under developed countries like South East Asia, Americans are ruining things by throwing their dollars around. First, customers tip regularly, then people expect it. If it continues, their employers will notice and reduce their salary, as after all they make good tips. The time will then come where employers pay them no salary at all! Like in the good old US of A.

A restaurant is there to serve the customer. The price of food should include the use of the restaurant and services! A tip should be given for very good service or out of the way service. But calculating 15% every time just because you "have to" do is fucking insane.

We thought our input might be warranted on these issues. SnapFood provides online ordering from local restaurants in Manhattan. Customers pay on the website and are given the option of tipping. Our customers range from residential to commercial (businesses), so my statistics are across both.

Actual Stats: About 68% of customers pay a tip online, rather than waiting to tip in cash at the door. Of those who tip online, the average tip is 17.28%.

Recently, we were interviewed by NY Press and were asked what the "right tip" should be. Working with so many restaurants and having seen so many orders, we have some good advice on the subject.

The number one factor to a delivery person is time. The more time spent on you, the less probability of them receiving more tips. Therefore, your concern should be how much time of theirs do you usurp. Think of (a) how much time will it take to travel from the restaurant to your location, this will include factors such as street direction and weather; (b) how complicated is your location, i.e. will the delivery person have to wait at a security desk, will he have to wait for you to buzz him, is your elevator slow, are there stairs, etc.; and, (c) in many restaurants a large order (which is relative per restaurant) must be specially packed and the result is that a delivery person may be held up at the restaurant helping prep your order.

One last thing to consider when tipping upon arrival is whether you are ordering at peak time. If you place an order at 1pm on a weekday, your order will take longer to arrive than at 3:30pm. If you place an order at 7:30pm on any day, your order will take longer to arrive than other times. Most restaurant struggle to manage the high turnover rate of delivery staff. The net result is that if they are short staffed it impacts delivery times and this is especially difficult during peak times.

Finally, generally we recommend giving the delivery person the benefit of the doubt. Your desire to get the food quickly is directly aligned with their financial interests. They don't tend to dawdle.

Hope that was helpful!

- SnapFood.com

SnapFood helps you find great restaurants, view and print menus, and order food for delivery or pickup!

Glad you have the free time for masturbating Ckaudio.

What do I do? Something that allows me to go away on weekends. You know, as opposed to waiting tables and posting to blogs.

Claudio?

What do you do Claudio?

Once again, you've shown yourself incapable of serious discussion or, for that matter, answering logical points with anything remotely resembling the same.

But what more would one expect from a career waiter?

Oh - the Republican crack really stung. I'm so sorry.

No you are really some kind of Economic Darwinist "It deserves to die." I bet you practice that line in the mirror just like Travis Bickle.

And the funny thing is, if you're the sort of person who runs about accusing people of being Republicans, you're probably also the type who bemoans "corporate welfare" (in which case we'd be in agreement.)

Well tell me this - what's a tip, if not a form of corporate welfare? As I said in an earlier post, if a restaurant - or any business - can't survive without these kinds of life support, it deserves to die. It's the same whether you're US Air or the Russian Tea Room. Getting the staff paid should be as much a part of the business plan as drumming up buzz and scoring on the Zagat.

Seriously, the Republican comment was just stupid. If I were a Republican I'd probably also be die-hard pro-business, and would consequently be in favor of the status quo, which helps restaurant owners. To the contrary, I not only support minimum wage for wait staff, but a LIVING wage for everyone. Just goes to show what an ass you are, coming to such an absurd conclusion about me.

Waiter you must be a communist!

Claudio You must be a Republican!

I don't know what exactly being "emphatic" to the working man means. Perhaps you mean empathic? In any event, it's a ridiculous statement, and once again, you're avoiding the core issue several posters have raised.

Which is - Why on earth should we pay your wages directly through our tips, as opposed to letting your boss budget them into his operating costs? Would that impact restaurant prices? Of course it would. And those restaurants that consumers felt were not worth the extra change would simply go out of business. So be it. This is how every other kind of business operates. If you can't cut it, you don't make the cut. I'd find this preferable to blanket 15-20% tipping, which is expected regardless of quality. As it stands, 9 times out of ten we're rewarding mediocrity. Just another reason why this system is despicable.

Now, if you want to talk empathy, why is it the vast majority of "working people" don't get tips? These people work second jobs to make ends meet, seek government support, or go back to school to move up a notch. Why should you be any different? Why should we single you out for charity? Besides - our city taxes, the highest in the country, already pay for CUNY and all manner of public subsidies. I'd say that's more than enough empathy.

An earlier poster stated that tipping was a very personal issue. It reflected an aspect of who you are. Are you emphatic to the working man? Are you generous? He was right. That's why it's such an emotional topic. Claudio's angry reply is evidence of how incendiary this topic can be. Look at how many posts the Tipping Point got compared to other forums in the Gothamist. Hmmm.

Claudio has the usual knee jerk "get another job" reaction so many of you have. Claudio is wrong of course for reasons I have enmuerated in previous postings. He has his view - I have mine. However Claudio if you decide not to tip you will become the Yassir Arafat of restuarant patrons. Eating in a different restaurant all the time. I mean you will piss off so many waiters you will never get good service at any restaurant a resonable distance from your home. That will put a crimp in your dating life. That is if you have a dating life.

"Bad" tips...

You know, waiter, the more I hear out of you, the less inclined I am to tip so much as a dime. You're not entitled to a cent. Tipping is voluntary, and as such any tip is a good tip. There are no bad tips. There are however bad jobs, and waiting tables may well be one of them.

So here's a tip: get a better job, write your legislators to demand the same minimum wage every other class of American worker gets, or shut the hell up.

Since we are on the subject of tipping let me raise a hot button topic - are African Americans' bad tippers? If you were a waiter what was your experience? If you are African American how do you feel being characterized as a bad tipper? Trust me - most waiters, no matter how racially enlightened, - will agree with that generalization. Sad but true. But before you write me and call me a racist cracker - go to

http://www.npr.org/features/feature.php?wfId=1329241 and read the article about a Cornell University study on blacks and tipping. Please listen to the interview as well. It is most illuminating. Leaving bad tips has more consequences than you might realize.

waiter, i can't tell when you're being sarcastic or not... i honestly don't follow your 'elitist' comments but it appears to be a pointless semantic argument. as i said, MOST can wait tables, not everyone. more difficult locales usually pay more money as you've witnessed by your high wages. but in general, it is a simple job, and thus relatively low paid. there's nothing strange about your friend making $150,000 if that's what he's worth to the business. that's the nature of the system right? it just reinforces my point: if you're valuable, you get paid for it. if your skills are a dime-a-dozen, then i guess you complain about your tips.

did i say i was proud that i waited tables? nope. i told you that i speak from experience. would i be toast at your friend's restaurant? i doubt it, but the point is moot... food service, while fun, is not my life ambition.

The reality is that tipping is dumb but since it is the system I partake. Generally 20%

BUT I do think it is unfair that we tip waiters 20% but tip the delivery person only a couple of bucks - his trip is alot further.

And why should I have to tip cab drivers & haircutters (I do but..) I mean this is the basic service I am paying for , what am I grateful for (i.e.gratuity) that I wasnt in a car accident or that you didnt f-up my hair.

Just charge me what UP FRONT and I'd be a lot happier.

Yes I guess I have a melodramatic streak Hijiki! You have got me figured out. As for charging you with elitism that would imply that you belong to some sort of uber yuppie cohort that has superior intellect, wealth or abilities organizing society for the benefit of its limited number. That’s the Republicans my friend!

Waiting table is an easy job in some places to be sure, harder in others. I disagree that anyone can wait tables. Some people are not temperamentally suited for it. I make a professional wage because I am as professional waiter and I am very good at what I do. I have a friend who is the maitre d’ at one of the better French restaurants in NYC. He makes well over $150,000 a year. Doesn’t that just burn your ass? Now I know you are very proud you waited tables in your past but if you worked at his place you would be toast.

But having worked in a restaurant at least you agree it’s a job. Thanks for not demeaning us and saying were all a bunch of screw-ups.

You would be perfectly fine if you lost your job today? That’s very Zen grasshopper. Most people, including a lot of the readers in these posts, would be wigging the fuck out!

Enjoy jousting with you elites! What am I talking about? Very little of what I have read in these posts shows much superiority in anything.

Feel free to bitch at me at http://www.waiterrant.blogspot.com/

Love to you all.

waiter, you're so melodramatic. tell me, why should you make more than your $800-900/week waiting tables? that's a professional wage. what do you do that deserves so much money? it's not that it's a drag on society, but waiting tables is easy for most and therefore not worth big bucks. seriously, you are not some charity case worthy of donations so quit playing the the pauper.

you know how the system works and whining about it and chasing after low tippers certainly won't get you more handouts. you're not entitled to anything, you have to work for what you want. that's nothing new, it's worked this way for our entire lives. all you have to do is find a new job if you don't like the way this one works. i made no generalization that waiters are dumb, dirty, or that the job is demeaning... it's not, you're just trying to impose elitism on me.

and to respond to your assumptions on who i am... i accept the system for what it is and i'd be perfectly fine if i lost my job today (are you insinuating that waiting jobs got shipped off to china?!). like i said, i've worked your job in the past and i enjoyed it very much. i doubt you'd be much of a teacher for me.

Good lord, if restaurant owners were held "to their obligations as employers," as Hamilton suggests, if the system were changed, then restaurant prices would surely rise by, say, about 15% to 20%.

So, I have a suggestion for both Hamilton and Costco Nadia: please stay home. In the world of good customers and bad customers, you definitely belong to the bad. It's in the best interests of restaurant owners and certainly waiters if you simply stay home and cook your Costco dinners.

But then again, have you seen the markup on their prices? Damn capitalistic pricing systems!

I'd have no problem patronizing only such restaurants. But I'd say the onus is on restaurant workers to tell us who's a fair boss, and who isn't, so we can make informed choices. How bout a Zagat "Shame on You" Survey? Meanwhile, I'll continue leaving a few bucks as a nominal tip, just a people do the world over. And if you don't like it, get a different job.

Damn. You know, hotel maids, who do a hell of a lot more (and more skilled, and more demeaning) work than waiters, customarily only get a buck or two.

Amen Sister!

Please, please, the way to change a system you disagree with is not, in this case, to repeatedly harm the lowest-ranking members until the whole pyramid collapses. If you are so angered by existing practice that you simply can't bear to leave a tip for table service (generally speaking, not in cases of abysmally bad service), then please do something a little more pro-active and a lot more kind: patronize only those restaurants that meet your standards. Or open one of your own.

PS. If people "act on principle" and leave a nominal tip because they feel owners are skipping out on their obligation they are not hurting the owners - they are hurting the waiters! If you are opposed to the practice of tipping eat in a restaurant where the waitstaff is paid a living wage or there is no table service.

I really dislike Wal-Mart so I try not to shop there. I don't, however, mug the employees on payday and take their money!

Hamilton,

Please enumerate what you believe a restaurant owners obligations are to a waiter. Thanks. Maybe I could understand the point you are trying to make if you flesh out your argument a bit.

"letting us make a living is somehow a drag on greater society..."

Jesus, you STILL don't get the point! No one's arguing you shouldn't make a living! It's about holding restaurant owners to their obligations as employers. You are NOT self-employed. A cab driver IS, and there's the difference where my personal tipping philosophy is concerned. This stupid, almost exclusively American system benefits you, so you have no problem with it. Well, others do. Same way you're desperate to defend the status quo in your business, pharmaceuticals fight drug importation, because they know they have something good they stand to lose if things change.

Don't worry, waiter, Americans are too complacent to make a fuss big enough to change the system. But if now and then one of us comes to your restaurant and leaves no more than a nominal tip, don't assume it's cheapness or elitist indifference to your plight in life. We might just be acting on principle.

Sorry about the flame post. Beer, anger, and the internet are a combustible mix!

Just because your attitude pisses me off, waiter, I plan on leaving 10% from now on. For good service.

waiter, waiting is a good high school and college job. it's very easy and low skill... most people can do it well. that's why it doesn't bring in a big salary. there's your economic reality: low skill gets low wage. if you want to hold onto a job like this to suppliment your income through adulthood, then accept it's reality. you know very well that not everyone will be interested in contributing and it's a risk you take to make easy money. you know how it works.

you make $800-$900/week waiting tables! you're making out like a bandit. i wouldn't be complaining.

Sorry about the flame post. Beer, anger, and the internet are a combustible mix!

Oh my God I just read your comment Jakeline O'Connor! I have got news fot you - you are cheap. You are as cold as ice. Did anyone ever tell you that before?

Sorry I meant I disagreed with Joe in my earlier post. Sorry Hamiton.

I'm a little shocked by the number of people who think that tipping isn't important. This is your waiter's LIVING. If you can't afford to tip at a respectable level, as others have said, don't eat anywhere with table service. That's your perogative.

I believe that by entering the restaurant and ordering food you're tacitly agreeing to follow the nearly-universal precedent for this industry. The fact that you don't pay for a waiter's services until you're completely done enjoying the benefits of those services already puts him or her at a disadvantage; they could do everything right and still have a tip withheld because lots of patrons enjoy wielding that kind of power. An unpleasant kind of patron, yes, but an all too common one.

Maybe if you have no intention of tipping or holding to a 15-20% standard you should announce this to your waiter as you're being seated, so he or she knows exactly what to expect. Just in the interest of fairness, of course.

It may be a shitty system, but if you object so very strongly, try only eating at restaurants that pay waitstaff a decent wage on the books. I don't know how many are out there but maybe you could open one.

Will any of you waiters and bartenders please stop missing the point Nadia and Joe and others haev made?

Tipping lets your bosses off the hook. Lots of us have a big problem with that. So should you.

Nadia, are waiters beneath you? If you don't think they deserve a tip, go where you do not give tips(i.e. fast food). I work a "real job" in an office all week and work at a bar on the weekends and EVERYONE else there has real jobs as well. We depend on tips to have some more to save b/c our day jobs are not paying us enough(and if we could change that we would). Since I cannot afford to go out to dinner that much, I don't. I feel way to guilty not being able to leave a good enough tip to someone who deserves it, so I usually get carry-out. You don't have to do 20%, but no less than 15%, unless the service is terrible and then at that point you should let the manager know. Some people were not meant to be waiters/bartenders.

Watch the movie Reservoir Dogs to find out about why you should tip. It's very informative.

I tip purely on service, depending on whether I enjoyed the food and if the waiter was attentive and nice. I've worked in retail for many years, and as a sales associate, if I'm not nice and polite to the customers, I don't make a sale. So, why if the service is crappy, and the food is aweful should I tip 15-20% of my hard earned money? That makes no sense, the customer is always right. And for all you waiters out there complaining, if you did your job well, smiled and your service and food was good, you'll get your tip, just don't expect it if you don't work for it. In Europe, people rarely tip, and its not a global custom, certainly its not an mandatory obligation by any means.

Also, its not a good thing if the restaurant and service is bad to tip because what signal are you sending the restaurant? Your tip is the ultimate sign of your satisfaction. If the food is bad, I tell the waiter, because if I owned a restaurant I would like to receive what I would preceive as constructive criticism. So that I can improve on my business and expand my customer base. It only makes sense.

Its not about being cheap, tipping or not tipping, its ultimately about service and quality. Or at least, it should be!

I can understand this tipping culture. Seems like it would be better to just pay the staff a decent wage and be done with it.

Bring back the automat.

Waiter,

I understand you have an axe to grind here, but you're missing the point. The point is that tipping is an ass-backwards social convention, and it doesn't make a hell of a lot of sense for anybody but the restaurant owner.

You compare waiting tables to sales (unless you're talking specials, this is weak to begin with), yet salespeople's commissions are paid by their employers, not their clients - with the general exception of real estate brokers. And for all intents and purposes, brokers are self-employed, so the analogy is invalid. They are not paid any salary, have no benefits, etc. Sure, you can argue that the costs of compensation for corporate sales forces are baked into all kinds of end-user costs. Well, I'd agree with Nadai that restaurant prices already reflect a significant markup. The "end-user cost," as it were, is already hefty when I'm paying $15 for 10 cents' worth of wholesale Ronzoni with some tomato sauce and parmesan tossed on it.

Your passion is misdirected. People like you should be raising your voices demanding a living wage. That's your boss' job. It shouldn't be my responsibility as a consumer to bail him (or you) out.

I just double the tax. Simple.

waiter,

i've seen restaurant owners shopping at costco and have a pretty damn good idea what the markup's like. buying two dozen lambchops for $12.99, then selling these for $5 a chop sounds like a pretty profit to me. my POINT, if you would get your defensive head out of your ass, is that these profits should pay your wages - NOT my tips.

my second point, about primadonnas getting "real" jobs, concerns the legion of nyc artists (of widely varying abilities) who feel it is beneath them to work a regular, 9-5, white collar job. this is so common it's a goddamned cliche. old as "la boheme." i can understand actors who need to be free to audition during those hours. as for everyone else, it's a masochistic kind of vanity i think people need to grow out of.

finally, waiter, tell me why you deserve a tip - but equally hard-working (or harder-working) retail clerks don't? that's what i did all through school, for crap money. minimum wage. then i graduated and got a real job. do the same - or stop whining. and lose your childish sense of entitlement.

"It's probably one of the most difficult jobs around"

now that's just silly... i've been a waiter and it was one of the easiest, most enjoyable jobs i've had. i'm sure it's not for everyone, but come on! there's almost no danger, you get to move around and share time with your coworkers, and honestly, you get paid quite well for what you do. seriously, how much do you think a waitron deserves for a night?? most of the waitstaff i've worked with were not going to lose their apartment if they didn't get a few tips. on the other hand, look at cabbies working longer hours, much more danger, crappy environment, alone, and more often the bread-winner for a large family. i almost always tip 20%, but you're discrediting yourself by overstating the difficulties of that job. if you think your worth more then find your talent and exploit it instead of complaining that you're not getting your proper handouts. you all knew the game and its hardships before you took the job.

on the question of since when did 15% become 20%, I always understood it like this - I grew up in the nyc suburbs, and was always taught to tip 15%. When my older sister went to school in the city and I started spending more time there, she taught me that in the city 20% is expected, and I guess I just accepted it. All the people who are shady tippers are probably not the types of people I'd like to be friends with, let's put it that way. It's probably one of the most difficult jobs around; everyone should be a little more understanding. Not saying you shouldn't dock your tip to 15% if the service is pretty bad, that seems reasonable, but honestly, make sure the service was definitely sucky before you just willy-nilly throw out someone's wages.

As a waiter I would like to make a few comments:

1. Tipping is optional but then again so is saying "please and thank you," giving your seat to an elderly lady on the subway and any other number of social conventions that lubricate the gears of a civil society. So just leave the tip for Christ sakes.

2. Mandatory tips on parties of six or more? Well I am all for it and let me explain why. How long does it take 2 people to eat? An hour and a half? Maybe. How long do you think a party of six or twenty for that matter will occupy valuable real estate in a restaurant. Three hours at least! That means the waiter will not be able to turn over as many tables and not make as much in tips. If he gets stiffed by the large party his/her night is shot. And oh boy do we get stiffed! One night I had a party of twelve that stayed five hours and the check was well over a thousand dollars. You know what they left me? 25 bucks! I chased those assholes into the parking lot and got the usual "get a real job" wisecracks. After that my establishment added the 18% mandatory gratuity for parties of six or more. If we didn't do that no waiter would ever want to take a large party again and the restaurant would have some serious problems. And we figure the tip PRETAX!

3. Doubling the tax to figure the tip. Nothing marks you as a New Yorker more than this stupid practice. Learn to count! When you venture outside of NYC to eat keep in mind that the sales taxes are lower in other communities and that doubling the tax can lead to 12 or 13% tips. Bring a calculator next time.

4. Now to Nadia's idiotic comments. Waiting tables is a real job for well over a million Americans! It puts food on the table, pays for educations, child support - you name it! Also the food markup is not as high as you think it is (Its booze where you really get robbed! But most New Yorkers are blissfully ignorant of this as they get plastered on $20 martini's) and the owners of most establishments work in the place every day and are not sunning themselves in the Hamptons. Her comments just demonstrate she knows nothing about how restaurants and the people who run them operate. Also, as in any profession there are immature waiters or "primadonnas." But Nadia have you hung out with any financial services types lately? Having been in the corporate world I saw more coke snorting relationship destroying antics than I ever did in the restaurant biz. Work a few days in a restaurant Nadia and you will understand what I mean. Peace out.

4. To all of you who tip 20% and have developed the empathy to understand to that things don’t always go right in the kitchen - you are saints! God bless you!

5. If you have any other problems with tipping go to my blog http://www.waiterrant.blogspot.com/ or email me at waiterrant@yahoo.com

6. Love the Gothamist!

Whenever I go to a resturant I usually add a tip of 20% to the charge slip and spell it out below. My brother had an incident where the waiter added an extra digit for his tip.

On another note - where the busboy cleared my 1/2 of glass wine while I was in the ladies room, I paid the 20% tip anyways- and spelled it out on the survey below that I was extremely upset with the loss of wine. I saw them both (waiter/busboy reading my note when I left)

I only drink in places where there are buy backs. The best way to signal your understanding is to buy a drink or two and place a $20 on the bar. Do it again for the next round (if two drinks gets you close to $20, find a new bar). You should have close to $20 sitting there is loose bills. Feed the pile judiciously throughout the night and you'll come out a little ahead by the time you leave, but have asolutely stand-up service and recognition when you return. Also, buy rounds, not individual drinks. Easier on the bartender, and makes it apparent the quality of tip you are leaving more quickly. If you drink like I do (which will range from 7-10 whiskies in a night), or are out with 3-4 people, expect that you are leaving $20-40 on the bar (in a good bar, that might be four drinks in there). And manage it well so you don't actually touch that pile when saying good night. Again, at best you will save cab fare, but it changes the entire bar patron dynamic for future visits. I can think of a handful of places in the EV where this is SOP. If that's not enough help, find Eric on E 6th Street. Best bartender in the East Village.

i tend to tip close to 20%. my sister's been working in food service for a long time, so even though i know the standard was 15% when i was growing up (doubling the tax used to be thought of as a good tip), i appreciate that servers basically live off tips. i also know that they end up having to split their tips with the bus boys et al, and i know of some places where everyone's tips get put into a fund and get split up evenly at the end of the night (which seems like a total asshole thing to do). i also tip 15-20% on cabs and food delivery, although i tend to tip less on cabs since the fares went up. i know that's crummy, because all that extra money is going to the dispatchers and not the cabbies, but it's just so expensive now. on fares under 10 bucks, i usually add a dollar and round up, and then up to $20 i add 2 and round up. and i give bartenders a buck per drink, even though they're not really doing anything, and i've never gotten a free drink out of it. i very rarely put money in tip jars at, like, starbucks, although if they're really friendly i'll throw my loose change in.

So sorry about the multiple postings. I didn't realize that the mechanism was kinda slow.

Obviously, considering the number of responses, this topic is a touchy point among NYers. The reason: it's a point of decision for the buyer and the decision, while seeming a minor one, is actually freighted with moral complexity. It asks: are you generous? Are you empathic? Do you understand what it is to work, to labor, to serve? Or do you just make a show of these qualities because that's what's expected?

It's also a real world question, a dollars and sense one, if you will, because 15 to 20 percent of a typicallly already high restaurant bill is quite a bit of money. So just as you expect the food you pay for to be tasty, so should you expect the service to be agreeable.

Tipping is, also, for better or worse, the only place where a restaurant customer actively enters the feedback loop. Consistently bad tips signal consistent dissatisfaction whether or not it was the server's fault. The owners of such a place might realize that because they might have a hard time keeping good front-of-house help

That said, about the particular incident: whether the customer was a cheap bastid or making a principled stand, who knows? But I'm more astonished that the proprietor chose to ARREST a customer over a few bucks rather than let the whole thing slide. My guess is if the owners would do that, the place is probably a shithole. Arresting customers is not good pr. So probably A Battle of Wills by the Cheap Bastids, may we never see the sight of them in hallowed Gotham ever.

Obviously, considering the number of responses, this topic is a touchy point among NYers. The reason: it's a point of decision for the buyer and the decision, while seeming a minor one, is actually freighted with moral complexity. It asks: are you generous? Are you empathic? Do you understand what it is to work, to labor, to serve? Or do you just make a show of these qualities because that's what's expected?

It's also a real world question, a dollars and sense one, if you will, because 15 to 20 percent of a typicallly already high restaurant bill is quite a bit of money. So just as you expect the food you pay for to be tasty, so should you expect the service to be agreeable.

Tipping is, also, for better or worse, the only place where a restaurant customer actively enters the feedback loop. Consistently bad tips signal consistent dissatisfaction whether or not it was the server's fault. The owners of such a place might realize that because they might have a hard time keeping good front-of-house help

That said, about the particular incident: whether the customer was a cheap bastid or making a principled stand, who knows? But I'm more astonished that the proprietor chose to ARREST a customer over a few bucks rather than let the whole thing slide. My guess is if the owners would do that, the place is probably a shithole. Arresting customers is not good pr. So probably A Battle of Wills by the Cheap Bastids, may we never see the sight of them in hallowed Gotham ever.

In the new era of $11 drinks (thank you, Joe's Pub, for that height of common-man suckage), I've abandoned the 20% of the drink total and am reverting to a buck a drink. It's just silly otherwise. In general I tip 20% and more for food service; too many friends have worked in that trade to skimp.

However, once in a while I don't have as much cash as I thought I had, and if the tip is going to be mandatory - I agree with all above - it should be included in the price on the menu. If I don't leave it, there's probably a reason, and it's my choice. Shouldn't require any explanation.

It's rare that I don't tip, and usually it's called for when it comes up.

BTW, the bit about TIPS standing for To Insure Prompt Service (or TIP as To Improve Performance, another common one) is not true. Just as POSH is not from Port Out Starboard Home. Nice ideas, but most of those explanations are post-facto creations. The use of acronyms is recent and not as widespread as might be thought, and it is almost never a correct origin of words predating the very modern age. In the same vein, For Unlawful Common Knowledge certainly is not, but we still don't know where that word did come from.

You can read a bit about the origins of "tip" here, and in many other spots. Try Googling tip with etymology or somesuch.

Obviously, considering the number of responses, this topic is a touchy point among NYers. The reason: it's a point of decision for the buyer and the decision, while seeming a minor one, is actually freighted with moral complexity. It asks: are you generous? Are you empathic? Do you understand what it is to work, to labor, to serve? Or do you just make a show of these qualities because that's what's expected?

It's also a real world question, a dollars and sense one, if you will, because 15 to 20 percent of a typicallly already high restaurant bill is quite a bit of money. So just as you expect the food you pay for to be tasty, so should you expect the service to be agreeable.

Tipping is, also, for better or worse, the only place where a restaurant customer actively enters the feedback loop. Consistently bad tips signal consistent dissatisfaction whether or not it was the server's fault. The owners of such a place might realize that because they might have a hard time keeping good front-of-house help

That said, about the particular incident: whether the customer was a cheap bastid or making a principled stand, who knows? But I'm more astonished that the proprietor chose to ARREST a customer over a few bucks rather than let the whole thing slide. My guess is if the owners would do that, the place is probably a shithole. Arresting customers is not good pr. So probably A Battle of Wills by the Cheap Bastids, may we never see the sight of them in hallowed Gotham ever.

I have tipped as high as 50%, much to the dismay of my budget, and as low as 10%. My budget generally requires me to tip between 15% and 25%.

Usually 15%. Maybe add a couple bucks if the service is really great. It's funny though, I tend to tip cabs 20%, if not a little more. I usually add a bit extra on since whenever I'm taking cab home, it's from Manhattan to Brooklyn and you know that driver may not have a customer going back to the city at 3 a.m.

So the next question is cabs -- do you tip the same rate as restaurants?

I thought it was illegal now for the bartenders to give buy-backs? When I was in college in the Bronx that is how I survived going out - pay for two, third one if free. I have never, ever, never, received a 3rd beer free here in the city and believe me I don't go to fancy places.

I usually tip 20%. I remember back in the day when I was a waitress I made $2.15, my check used to be like $9.00 after I worked 5 shifts (after taxes). They rely on that tip money, because that is the way it works here.

As for delivering (yes I did that too - a pizza delivery girl with interesting stories), but anyway I was a youngin and not that big of a person. I used to carry huge trays of food into these places and leave there with a $3 buck tip on a $170 order. That's wrong. Use your judgment - if its raining give more (because you didn't want to go outside yourself), but it certainly doesn’t need to be 20%.

I've never seen so much consensus on the tipping question in my life! Nice, constructive, non-bitter comments here. I just want to add that even if the server is lousy, remember that he or she has to tip out the food runner, s.a., busser, host, bartender, barback, and dessert/salad person. A good solution, and one that sends a good message, is to visibly tip these people yourself to be sure that they get rewarded even if your server failed. Bussers are almost always the most competent people in the restaurant, even if their language skills tend toward the non-English. One last thing--the server is not responsible for the food quality, but a tip should reflect how well they handle any food problems that arise--they should be defeding you in the kitchen, not defending the kitchen in the dining room.

Re: Bar tipping. A $1 tip is a good investment in any decent bar (of which there are very few left in NYC), in that in any good bar after buying two or three rounds of drinks while leaving decent tips- the bartender will buy you a round. So everyone wins- the bartenders gets good tips, you get free drinks (a free $6 beer more than makes up for the $3 in tips you have spent) and the bar owner gets a regular. Granted if you are in some place where the bartender couldnt give a damn about you- feel free not to tip. In any other bar- it is worth your while.

Federal minimum wage for resturant servers is as low as $2.13 per hour. There is a formula to what they get paid, as long as their minimum rate in addition to their tips is equal to or greater than the standard federal minimum wage of $5.15. This will vary in different states where the state may have higher standards. (I happen to work in an hr dept, so I have to know these things.)

originally, T.I.P. was an acronym for 'to ensure promptness'...

its pretty ridiculous how far from its original meaning the concept has evolved.

I've heard the reason to tip 20% or more is because waitstaff make less than minimum wage and really count on the tips. How true is this?

totally true. The minimum wage for regular folks is in the $5 range, while for waitstaff it's in the $3 range. this is an old press release from 2000, but it specifically shows the distinction.

I ususaly tip 15%, if the service is good, I have no problem tipping 20% or more.

One thing that has not been mentioned here is that the IRS knows servers get tips, and they are taxed based upon the totals of the checks for each table, regardless of whether they get a tip or not. Therefore, if there is no tip left, the server still pays taxes as if there was, which translates to them loosing money each time there is no tip left. Not completely fair, but the IRS is going to find a way to tax you no matter what. Because of this, I will still tip at least 10% when the service sucks, and then I will think again about returning to that establishment.

Had a waitering stint @ Diner24 when it first opened and left within a week when I discovered that we (as waiters) had to tip out close to 50%to the underpaid bussers and food runners. I, myself have worked in this business too long to be vindictive, and I will never tip less than 15% of the total check (Tax included)even if the food is sub-par and the service sucks. Chock it up to a bad dining experience and tell as many people as you could to steer clear of that establishment. According to the Documentary, "Eat this New York", over 1,000 restaurants open in NYC each year. With that, given our limited space, just as many are going out of business.

What do you do when you pick up food? Occasionally when I order out, the waitress brings me my order, and presents me with the receipt which (naturally) has the tip space on it. Should I feel bad for not leaving anything extra?

I've heard the reason to tip 20% or more is because waitstaff make less than minimum wage and really count on the tips. How true is this?

I generally tip closer to 20%, though if the service is terrible, as it was at Paris Commune last Friday night, I will leave less. Poor food quality is not as big a deterrent to me to tipping, as a tip seems to mostly reward outstanding service. If the service is unacceptable, the tip will reflect that.

Riddle me this: Since when did the standard tip go from 15% to 20%? Twenty percent is a pretty hefty fraction of any amount. And $1 per drink for a bartender? When all they are doing is holding a pint glass under a tap for 10 seconds? Ridiculous. A buck per round is more reasonable I think, two if there's more than 3 drinks in the ordre or if they are mixed drinks. And here's some advice for you bartenders -- want a tip the next time I come up to the bar? Then say THANK YOU when I tip you, goddamn it.

i went to a japanese restaurant once where they refused to accept a tip because it was considered rude. they told me the service should be excellent at all times, and so tipping is not required. and remember tipping is also not a town in china.

I always tip 20%. As stated above, the math is easy, and regardless of the meal cost, since dining out is basically a luuxry (there are plenty of places where you can get good food reasonably cheap with little pressure to tip -- Mama's, Bereket, etc., so going to sit down dinner doesn't really qualify you for any kind of rationalizing your way out of it). But when I get bad service I never quite know what to do, and I'd say it's 10% of the time, and half that, really bad. And this is using a rule of average service means I am waiting to signal someone for an extra drink, probably have not received water at all. I have low standards since severs or either overworked, or of middling competence -- this is NY; if you could get really good waiting table a restaurant that has $12 entrees, you're already gone. When I get abysmal service, I'm always struck with how to communicate it, since every time I read one of these exchanges, I always hear about how 'assholes never tip enough'. And when 10 people end up sharing a dinner, I'm always covering for the two people who are stiffing their friends, to say nothing of the servers (I once watched a women try and take back tip money that I had added over and above the table and put it in her pocket saying we were overtipping even though someone else was buying her dinner), so how do I communicate to a server in the short window I have that I have left less than 20% perhaps well under 5% of the time (and I go months without cooking at home), but that is a very decided decision that is intended to communicate displeasure with their performance, which they should perhaps address. It seems irresolvable, other than speaking to a head waiter/host, etc.

What we need is a forum on divying up a check, cause I'm sick of buying dinner for two extra people I just met cause they are rude or stupid.

When the service is good...20%, but when its bad (or the food is bad), the patron has every right to withhold or reduce the tip.

I had an experience similar to whatisee's. At Essex once, for brunch with nine friends, my brunch came out of the kitchen well after all my friends were finished eating. But it wasn't that they forgot, it was that the kitchen was overwhelmed and rather than hold up everyone, they delayed my food.

Everyone was apologetic. Kitchen guys came out to say they were sorry. The hostess massaged my shoulders and made sure my drink stayed full. The waiter also rubbed my shoulders, sparking jealous dirty looks from the gay men at our table. And they brought shots around for the table when we'd all finally finished eating.

I didn't ask for any of this extra attention, but I think I tipped almost 30% for it, even though my meal was late.

Generally, though, I tip 20%, unless service is bad or the tip is mandatory.

When did 15% become 20%??? don't tell me inflation, because, duh, restaurant prices rise with inflation, and thus the dollar amount of tips.

In NYC, I double the tax, which gives you what, 17%? I usually round up to the next dollar, (or what makes it easier to divide the change among the party, 'cause I majored in English), which puts it around 18-19%. If the service was excellent, I chuck in another dollar, which usually puts it a little over 20%. At a place I often visit, I usually leave 25%--because I go there all the time and get told about things that aren't on the menu, or get samples of new stuff. I haven't had much bad service, but I wouldn't feel guilty skimping on the tip if the service was bad, because it's a *tip*, implying a reward of sorts.

At bars, I generally leave $1 per drink per round (unless it's a really expensive place).

finally some new from my neck of the woods, according to the DA (Kate Hogan) this isn't the end of mandatory tips it just mean that they have to rephrase their menu to say: "service charge" "surcharge"

as for tipping, i like to tip with art and try to draw something nice and memorable on the napkin or make a list of life tips for them. or i would if i could draw and knew the servers didn't expect financial bonuses based on societies norms

15% Tip. Everyday.

I don't think it should be mandatory. Have you ever seen the pricing structure for weddings. In fact, you have to pay that HEFTY figure prior to your wedding date.

Mandantory tipping is very annoying and in my experience leads to less of a tip for the waiters. Since they generally add on 15-18% on a group and I am definately one of those who typically tips 20%- but if you have already done the math, are unwilling to take the risk of not getting 18%, combined with my general disinclination to do math at the end of the meal- enjoy your 18%. And under tipping is good- cull the herd of the bad waiters. There will always be more actors and real professional waiters make good money by providing good service- just like bartenders ( $1 a drink minimum).

I only tip when the service is really good, when I see that the waiter put on an extra work for me, otherwise I don't fell myself compelled to tip at all. In my view, they are being paid to do that kind of job, and I am paying the restaurant for its services, what includes serving me. you can call me cheap or anything else, I really don't care, my money don't grow in trees and if you are applying for the waiter job, you already know what it will be like. I agree with the others, if you don't like it, get a real job. It's time, we start tipping for a reason not because of the poor worker, scr.. the worker, no one tip me at my job for being polite, that's my obligation if I want to receive my wages.

Usually 20%, sometimes higher, sometimes lower.

$1 to make a point. Like the time we had really really bad service, four of us there, only three meals showed up. We kept asking the bus boy and other waiters for our waitress, she showed up 15 min later and asked if we were ready for dessert. Turns out she had never put in the other meal order in addition to some other mistakes. She offered to put the order in then, but we just asked for the check.

We paid the bill, gave $1 for the tip, but as we were walking out, this freaked out guy jumped in front of us and asked why we only tipped him $1. We asked him who he was and it turns out he was our waiter, though we had never seen him before. The other girl was supposed to be following him on her first night, but he let her handle the entire section by herself.

When I was 15, I was a bus boy for about three days before I ran screaming for the door. Service is tough work. So I always try to hit 20%. No matter how bad the food or service is, I can't stiff. I just don't have it in me. Servers have to deal with too much, especially people who think a big tip is a balloon payment on rudeness. I will drop to 10% if something's really ticked me off.

Having said that, mandatory gratuities on menus always bug me a little. But I can't quite figure out if it bugs me because the restaraunt is demanding a tip or if its because they can't depend on people to do the right thing.

This Tavares chap has other issues. It's not about the tip, friends. A couple of hundred dollars, a fight with police, and a night in jail over an extra $6 or so on a tip in a mom and pop restuarant doesn't add up in a rational mind. There's other ways to tell Joe and Tina Soprano their restaurant sucks.

I tip double the tax. If services is exceptionally good, 20-25%.

If service is bad, no one is under any obligation to pay anything regardless of ridiculous social mores. I have no shame in putting down no tip if it is deserved.

it got me thinking curb your enthusiasm.

Hey Jen,

20% always.

10% if the service was questionable.

1 penny if it was bad.

The penny is rare because I can pretty much figure out if service is going to suck. This has only happened when the server was a Jekyll & Hyde kind of idiot.

Now that I have kids, I just frequent the same places. It's just not worth it to me to do the foodie exploration thing anymore. I'd rather spend my money some other way.

Generally I put in 15% for decent service, but on principle I really have a problem with the custom.

First, restaurant prices already reflect a ridiculous markup of the food I'm eating. Second, where do these jerks get off passing me the buck on paying their workers, while they're off in the Hamptons and I'm working 60 hours a week? Lastly.. there are plenty of other menial jobs where workers are NOT customarily tipped. I worked a couple of these myself in my college days, so that pretty much does away with the sympathy factor, sorry. As for the primadonnas who wait tables for a day job, hey - time to grow up. Plenty of us creative types work a "real" job and still find time to do our thing.

I nearly always tip a solid 20% unless the service is terrible and then I usually tip 20% anyway. I figure servers and kitchens can have bad nights and they rely on that money for their rent. Plus I'm just plain lazy. 10% is easy to figure out, but that's too small a tip, and 15% requires two much math. So much easier to just figure 10% of the total and double it.

I generally always tip around 20% too, except when the service is really bad (10-15%). But only when the service is bad - if it's something that's obviously not their fault, I try to take it into account.

I have left no tip on one occassion, but that was particularly egregious. The waiter was one of those guys who clearly only half-listens, and I repeated my order about 4 times before he claimed to have gotten it into his little handheld computer. Then, I got the wrong food (not even cooked wrong - I got a different item from the menu). When I refused the dish, he actually started arguing with me that I was the one who screwed up. Now - the fact that I repeated my order 4 times (I wanted tortellini, not penne) was pretty memorable to me, and the fact that he didn't just apologize and take the penne back was what pushed me over the edge.

I always tip two times the tax on the bill in NYC as an absolute minimum (no matter how bad the service). From there however good the service was I add more or if just average I stop there. I figure 17% or so is a good starting point. But regardless Taveras is a cheapo in my book. Hell I wish most meals for 9 were under $100 hahaha...

I worked in restaurants for two decades and ALWAYS overtip competent servers. Taveras is still a cheap bastard who took his displeasure of the food out on the servers. The servers still have to make a living whether he likes the food or not, and, by the way, its pizza, not an expensive 7 course french meal.